Al Gore has admitted that his early, critical support for corn-based ethanol subsidies — which he now admits is "not a good policy" — was designed to curry favor with Iowa farmers before his presidential run. Shameful! Enjoy liars' jail.

Wikileaks is threatening via Twitter that its next leak will be "7x the size of the Iraq War Logs," which themselves constituted nearly 400,000 files. So get ready to troll through 2.8 million of something.

Leonardo DiCaprio was one of 193 drunken, terrified passengers stuck circling JFK after a Moscow-bound flight blew an engine during takeoff. He signed autographs after the emergency landing. Luckily for him, the passengers weren't all Titanic fans.

Lady Gaga and her parents are now partners in the Manhattan eatery Vince & Eddie's. A fan of the "homey" atmosphere, Gaga is a silent partner in the Italian joint. That means no dress meat on the menu.

More Americans think 9/11 was an inside job than oppose naked X-ray screenings at airports. But the ones who oppose the X-rays happen to have access to your televisions and computers, so America is freaking out about the TSA.

One in four web pages viewed by Americans last week was on Facebook, helping the social network steal the largest share of internet visits from archrival Google, according to stats firm Hitwise. Karl Lagerfeld's "white gold Facebook" remains exclusive, however.

Take note, 2012 Republican presidential candidates: Alleged pundit Meghan McCain is available as a "strategist" for the election cycle; one of you'd better snatch her up post-haste! She will help you "kick Obama's ass," as she did in 2008.

Just nine short years after Washington intern Chandra Levy's highly-publicized murder, Ingmar Guandique has been convicted for the crime. That means it's officially time to stop thinking her old boss and lover Gary Condit actually did it. [AP]

Miley's eighteenth birthday party features bumping and grinding with her mom. Jay-Z shot his brother at age 12. Charlie Sheen's hooker gives an interview. Lenny Dykstra's dog could get repossessed. Just another manic Monday gossip roundup.

Tabloid sex-and-xenophobia commentator Andrea Peyser is, as we all know, America's chief booster of the concept of love. So it pains her to announce that Prince William and his slutty hussy bride-to-be are headed for The Big D (divorce).

NATO's senior civilian in Afghanistan, Mark Sedwill says kids in Kabul have little to worry about: "The children are probably safer here than they would be in London, New York or Glasgow." Meanwhile, civilian deaths are "soaring" across the country.

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was on the Sunday talk shows today addressing some of the most pressing foreign policy issues of our time. Then Face the Nation host Bob Schieffer asked if she would submit to a TSA pat-down.

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad told state-run newspaper Jam-e Jam that Iran's family planning program is "ungodly" and that girls should be getting married at 16, because the average Iranian woman gets married at 24 and there's "no reason for this."

In a new book, Light of the World, Pope Benedict XVI tells a German journalist that condoms are okay, as long as they're used by male prostitutes to prevent the spread of HIV. Otherwise, wrapping it up remains super unholy.

[The cast of Cirque du Soleil's "Wintuk" got the full view of Manhattan today when visiting the observation deck at the Empire State Building. Image via Getty]

We all knew Harvey Levin's TMZ pays people to leak information to them, as recently fired L.A. County Superior Court spokesman has been accused of doing. But their real secret? Just plant a staffer on the courthouse payroll. [Update below]

[Ke$ha, the pop star that drizzled out of Lady Gaga's jock strap, was styled to resemble an early '90s fad trinket at last night's Us Weekly Hot Hollywood party. More fascinating Ke$ha pictures after the jump.]

We learned last week that international Jew George Soros had infiltrated Sarah Palin's inner circle by hiring her adviser Randy Scheunemann. But the old man's tentacles are long: Not even Palin's Alaska running mate is clean of Soros' foul fingerprints.

Government counter-terrorism officials gamed out a very likely terrorist scenario in a Northern California drill this week: That of marijuana growers setting off bombs, taking hostages, and laying siege to a strategically critical dam. We are so prepared for this!

Author Robert Randolph has been talking to the tabloids about John Travolta's habit of hooking up with men at Los Angeles saunas. Most media outlets, however, were too shy to delve into the steamy details. We're not quite as timid.