Halle Berry's french husband Olivier Martinez could face battery charges after knocking an airport employee on his ass yesterday. The TMZ video here shows Halle and her beautiful family trying to make their way out of LAX in peace, before Olivier nails the employee with a baby car seat (presumably belonging to Maceo, Halle and Olivier's son).

Last week, actress Halle Berry observed Thanksgiving with the traditional Violent Fight—Almost to the Death—Between Frenchmen on her lawn, where her fiancé beat the shit out of the father of her child. Since then, accusations have been flying like bloodied fists:

Paris Hilton's birthday gift cost more than your house. Charlie Sheen lectures Lindsay Lohan on "impulse control." Jessica Alba is pregnant again. Thursday gossip likes the cars that go boom.

Lindsay Lohan says the jewelry store that filed grand theft charges against her keeps changing their story. Scarlett Johansson is supposedly diddling Sean Penn, Jennifer Aniston wants to move to New York, and Pete Wentz is getting divorced against his will. Thursday's gossip makes bad decisions.

Halle Berry's custody battle gets ugly. Jennifer Aniston could have been an SNL cast member. Whoopi Goldberg on shitting the bed. Lindsay Lohan didn't steal that necklace, she "borrowed" it. Thursday gossip has feminine wiles.

Rihanna celebrates looking sexy in a leaked sexting picture. Lindsay Lohan wears a shoplifted necklace. Mariah Carey is expecting twins. Wednesday's gossip roundup is comfortable with its body.

Celebrities: They bring their significant others to awkward family Thanksgiving dinners just like us! Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal sipped lattes; Kim Kardashian brought home Halle Berry's ex; Lindsay Lohan saw an old flame. Saturday's Gossip Roundup is eating leftovers.

Is this woman too thin, or are we too fat? Roman Polanski breaks his silence. Jenna and Tito are back together. Jay-Z and Beyonce probably aren't moving to rural Pennsylvania, but you never know. Just another Monday gossip roundup.

Jessica Simpson wants to be Michelle Obama, somehow. Jennifer Aniston is locked in a fitness war with a swimsuit model. Peaches wore a confederate flag shirt. Brooke Shields. Sunday's Gossip Roundup is giving a voice to the (literally) small people.

Kate Winslet picking up son Alfie from school ... Roman Abramovich and girlfriend Dasha Zhukova leaving Nello's after lunch ... Ed Burns taking his son trick or treating on Halloween ... Sandra Bernhard walking her dog ... Mark Ronson and sister Samantha leaving Bar Pitti on a Vespa ... Michelle Williams taking daughter Matilda to school ... Matt Damon and Emily Blunt filming scenes for The Adjustment Bureau in Chelsea ... Dustin Hoffman and son Jake attending a Knicks game ... Rachel Hunter standing on the set of Gravity ... Jude Law talking to his son on a stoop in the West Village ... Jimmy Fallon leaving last week's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame concert... Gabriel Aubry getting out of a taxi with his daughter ... and Sienna Miller walking her dog in SoHo.

Lilo stole the formula for her spray-tan product and passed on a starring role in The Hangover, Britney Spears visits the Eiffel Tower, Mischa Barton's wisdom teeth are making her bloated and Megan Fox steps out in an Armani dress.

Bar Refaeli eating lunch at Bar Pitti ... Lauren Conrad shopping with a friend at Topshop ... Josh Hartnett walking in Tribeca ... Seal leaving the Equinox in Soho ... Jerry Seinfeld arriving at Yankee Stadium right before Jay-Z turned up ... Geraldo Rivera walking in Midtown ... Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber jogging downtown ... Ben Affleck talking on his cell phone outside Rockefeller Center ... Agyness Deyn shooting a commercial with Gabriel Aubrey and later getting into an SUV... Ciara leaving her hotel ... and Joy and Regis Philbin walking home on the Upper West Side.

• Olivia Palermo and Whitney Port are "horrified" that MTV producers have been pressuring them to get into a physical fight at "work" for an upcoming episode on The City and they've even threatened to walk off the set if they're forced to participate. How principled! [P6]
• Lindsay Lohan "stomped around" and "caused chaos" after finding out she'd have to sit in economy on a flight home from Tampa on Saturday. (She also told a friend to "come and visit me back there in case I die.") Horrified flight attendants eventually found her a seat up front. [Fox News]
• Things seem to be heating up between Madonna and Jesus Luz. Also, she took the model to brunch at Macelleria on Sunday, so you know. [DM, NYDN]
• It looks like Julie Janklow's new paramour is none other than surfer Scott Murphy, who split with Marci Klein back in December. [P6, previously]

♦ In an interview with Barbara Walters which airs Friday, Peter Cook says it was Christie Brinkley's fault he cheated on her because she wasn't "meeting his needs." Oh, also, he'd like you to know he's really not a pervert. [NYDN]
♦ Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel are back together, although friends say they're "taking it slow." [People]
♦ Angelina Jolie got a tummy tuck, or at least that's what the Star says. [Star]
♦ Amy Winehouse's spokesperson says the singer is not suicidal. In fact, the rep says, "she's fine." Of course she is. [People]

Petra Nemcova (left) taking a stroll through the Village after lunch at Da Silvano ... Sarah Jessica Parker leaving her townhouse in the West Village ... Jeremy Piven taking a walk downtown with a mystery blonde ... Whitney Port eating a salad with friends ... Uma Thurman walking down the front steps of her West Village townhouse ... Nicole Richie leaving Starbucks with baby Harlow, and later leaving her hotel en route to a dinner with Mary-Kate Olsen ... Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry going shopping at Calvin Klein ... Keira Knightley heading inside for a taping of the Charlie Rose Show ... Helena Christensen and Sofia Coppola arriving at Bryant Park for the Marc Jacobs show ... and Jennifer Lopez and Victoria Beckham posing together for photos outside Marc's show before going to dinner.