first-world-problems
World Famous Chef Mulls Ban on Kids After Baby Cries in His Restaurant
Neetzan Zimmerman · 01/14/14 11:22AMThe Perfect Solution to Obnoxiously Loud Public Cellphone Conversations
Neetzan Zimmerman · 12/16/13 12:28PMTeachers Ban Students from Quoting Geico Hump Day Commercial
Neetzan Zimmerman · 10/04/13 01:52PMMan Murdered Wife For Making the Ketchup Bottle Too Hard to Open
Neetzan Zimmerman · 09/20/13 01:07PMManhattan Socialites Fret: Will Next Mayor Come to Our Parties?
Hamilton Nolan · 09/17/13 03:34PMThe Sadly True Thought Process Behind Every E-Mail Ever Sent
Neetzan Zimmerman · 09/09/13 10:30AMWe've all been there. Many, many times.
Woman Dislocates Jaw Biting Into Oversized 'Fat American' Burger
Neetzan Zimmerman · 08/20/13 01:15PMSafeway Shopper Horrified to Find Piece of Chicken in Her Chicken
Neetzan Zimmerman · 07/25/13 09:07AMCobain Daughter Slams Kardashian Sister for Tweeting About Tough Life
Neetzan Zimmerman · 05/24/13 04:40PMThe Police Blotter for America's Third Most Expensive Zip Code is a Thing of First World Beauty
Neetzan Zimmerman · 02/14/13 12:44PMTaco Bell Pulls Ad Making Fun of Veggie Eaters After Veggie Eaters Complain
Neetzan Zimmerman · 01/30/13 10:30AMWho is the Worst Person in This New York Times Article About Diners Taking Photos of Food?
Jordan Sargent · 01/22/13 11:32PMToday, the New York Times ran a story titled "Restaurants Turn Camera Shy," about the push back against the now ubiquitous act of diners taking photos of their food. As one would expect of a Times trend story about frivolous bullshit, no one profiled in the story comes off as sane and/or respectable. But who's the worst? That's for you to decide. Here are the candidates:
22-Year-Old Is Very Upset That She Didn't Get to Be Poor for a While
Hamilton Nolan · 07/10/12 03:25PMMeet Taylor Cotter. I mean, just pretend she's here or something. Taylor is a 22-year-old graduate of Northeastern Journalism School. She has a job, a car, and an apartment. So what is Taylor's big problem? Her big problem is that she's too successful to be living "that 10-cents-a-word life that I always wanted." Crumbs! Can we help this poor young go-getter, somehow?
Yoga Instructor Fired From Gig at Facebook HQ After Telling Employee Not to Check Facebook During Class
Neetzan Zimmerman · 07/10/12 02:12PM'BBQ Chip Bandits' Terrorize Sleepy Canadian City
Neetzan Zimmerman · 07/09/12 05:00PMAfter a woman called police in Saanich, British Columbia, to report a possible break-in, multiple units were sent to set up a containment around the scene.
Rich Person or Troll? The Perpetual UrbanBaby Riddle
Hamilton Nolan · 03/01/12 03:49PMThe message boards of UrbanBaby.com are home to some of the most self-loathing, wealthy, haughty, and miserable parents in all of America. Or are they? Even to our keen internet eyes, it is sometimes impossible to tell whether an UrbanBaby poster is a rich person, or a troll impersonating a rich person. Can you help?