Plenty of you are hitting the gym hard core right now to meet your New Year's resolutions. We're here to help you get fit they fey way with the world's gayest workout video.

Arianna Huffington, internet media mogul and legendary pooper, has "good news." She's launching a new Huffington Post vertical, called "HuffPost Good News":

The Republican presidential nominating contest is blowing wide open, as candidates move from the boring grassroots-organizing lowlands of Iowa and New Hampshire to the broader markets of South Carolina, Florida, Arizona, Michigan, Nevada, Colorado, and everywhere else. So we've compiled a list of collectibles that you — the resident, reporter, operative, thief, cad, provocateur, etc. — can procure for your beloved Gawker Political Desk in return for fair compensation. What are we looking for?

How long will we allow "the system" to persecute innocent marsupials and their impassioned human defenders? We are slyly referring, of course, to the case of Irwin Kangaroo, the well-dressed formerly paralyzed kangaroo and registered therapy pet owned by Oklahoma kangaroo owner Christie Carr.

Would it be good optics for President Obama to deliver his convention speech at Bank of America Stadium, in order "to sell more skyboxes to wealthy donors"? Nope, not really.

Yesterday we brought you a C-SPAN prank caller who asked New Hampshire Republican Party Chairman Wayne MacDonald whether Mitt Romney had a large penis (he does). Turns out it was not an isolated incident. Here is a compilation, via Mediaite, of C-SPAN callers—actually one caller, it sounds like—working in references to Mitt Romney's penis over the air. The last one is positively brilliant. Mitt Romney has a huge penis.

By now we're all very familiar with that one photo that Mitt Romney probably wants destroyed — the one where he and his buddies are erupting with cash money — since it appears in most anti-Romney campaign ads and articles and blog posts all the time. But what about this other one, which your Gawker Political Desk had not seen until yesterday?

Corporate whore Ben Stein, who claims to be an economist but is really a commercial actor with an undergraduate degree in economics, has sued Japanese electronics firm Kyocera for violating his "freedom of religion" by not hiring him as a pitchman because he denies the reality of global warming. This man lives his Republican values to the hilt.

New York Times public editor Arthur Brisbane has a question for his readers today: "Should the Times Be a Truth Vigilante?" That is: should Times reporters "challenge 'facts' that are asserted by newsmakers they write about"? Our feeling is... no. No, the Times should just make shit up.

What is the frontman of '90s rap-rock sensation Limp Bizkit up to these days? Just live-blogging his 60-day juice fast while falling slowly into despair, that's all. Welcome to the dark side of those social media public dieting miracles.

Life is never easy for Herbie Fully Loaded star Lindsay Lohan. After her countless trips to court and rehab and the Chateau Marmont, now she owes the government $94,000 because she didn't pay taxes in 2009. Oh, bother.

How excited are we all about Starbucks™' new Blonde Roast™? Right? We don't even need to explicate that one. The real question is, how excited are the Starbucks™ team member associate partner barista family members, who have the privilege of handing over the bags of the new Blonde Roast™ to enthusiastic customers like us?

Mitt Romney has had five or six years to formulate his response to a full onslaught on his record as corporate efficiency dweeb at Bain Capital, and here's what he's come up with: YOU PEOPLE ARE JEALOUS. Stop it. Go away!

Classical music fans are terribly sophisticated and demanding. They don't like it, for example, when their precious sonic cocoon is pierced by disabled people's medical devices, or by coughing sickies. Now they've nearly torn a man to pieces over his ringing iPhone.

Our new editor A.J. Daulerio—who would know—tells me that every time you write about Broncos quarterback and Filipino mohel Tim Tebow, you get a big response. He's right: after yesterday's "A Non Sports Fan's Guide to Tim Tebow," a lot of people in Colorado and Florida (and one guy in Australia) responded to let me know in no uncertain terms that I am an "entry level writer" and a "whiny little bitch." I've got a selection here.

Matt Drudge—who can usually be found boasting about all his mouth-breathing readers—has been taking umbrage today at the revelation that Department of Homeland Security officials "monitor" his web site, along with about 200 other news and social networking sites. Or as Glenn Beck's Blaze hilariously put it, "Homeland Security Given Green Light to Monitor American Journalists." So what do you call reading a newspaper?

America has entered a bold new era of internal mistrust: a new Pew survey officially shows that class conflict has surpassed both racial conflict and immigrant-native conflict as "the greatest source of tension in American society." Well—are you just going to stand there and let them get away with that?

Philadelphia meteorologist John Bolaris—a bar-trawling man-about-town who has been described as a "media self-promoter," "weatherhunk," "publicity hound," and "poonhound"—has lost his job in the wake of a "real-life The Hangover," with a side of Anchorman bluster.

Computer security consultant Thomas Ryan's ham-fisted attempt at spying on Occupy Wall Street last October exposed his own snitching to the feds. But the FBI apparently still trusts him enough to have had him speak at their big computer security conference this week.

Most of the big banks have kept quiet after President Obama controversially recess-appointed Richard Cordray to his throne atop Consumer Financial Protection Bureau. We still don't know how much this new bureaucracy will annoy the banks, but one can assume they were just fine with the previous arrangement, in which congressional procedural gimmicks were used to block it from ever taking formation. But then yesterday, something wonderful happened: Citigroup's lobbyist chimed in with a passive-aggressive blog post about the whole issue!