Even as Wikileaks battles for its digital existence and Interpol closes in on Julian Assange, the cables keep flowing. This week brought details about Berlusconi and Putin's bromance and China's Googling habits, plus tantalizing hints of extraterrestrials. Diplomatic gossip roundup!

This is the first Friday of the last month for 2010 movie releases! With that meaningless distinction in mind, we turn today to look at ballet nightmares, gay fantasias, and very bad Christmases.

Texas resident Aron Embry was talking on his Droid 2 smartphone when he heard a pop. He claims the phone had exploded in his ear. Embry was rushed to the hospital, where he got 4 stitches.

The second day of Senate hearings regarding a "Don't Ask Don't Tell" repeal went better for shameless filibuster-leader John McCain. But that's only because he fully embarrassed himself yesterday. But are the individual service chiefs really against repeal?

Kim Kardashian and other celebrities pledged to stay "digitally dead"—off Twitter and Facebook—until the Keep a Child Alive foundation raised a million dollars. But after two days, the foundation is still nowhere near that!

Because Gawker is nothing if not a philanthropic organization, we're giving away two prints from the book Special Photographer, a collection of late, great Hollywood photographer Leo Fuchs' work. How to win one? Easy! Just enter a caption contest.

Barack Obama got so sick of everyone bitching about him that he issued his first presidential pardons today, to nine world-famous murderers who'll eat the guts of every web commenter who types "GROW A PAIR, OBAMA" from now on. Seriously.

When Facebook users put their mind to it, they can do anything: Now they've banded together to defeat child abuse once and for all. By changing their profile pictures to 90s and 80s cartoon characters!

The Library of Congress has blocked access to the Wikileaks site on its staff computers and on the wireless network that visitors use, two sources tell TPM.

Last month, Russia was the No. 1 source of spam in the world. It's probably because of Oleg Nikolaenko, a 23-year-old who was recently arrested for flooding the world with 10 billion spam emails a day.

Barack Obama decided to head to Afghanistan for a pre-Christmas visit to the troops and to meet with Afghan President Hamid Karzai. But due to bad weather and "technical difficulties," the meeting was downgraded to a lousy phone call.

The website BabyCenter released its annual list of the most popular baby names in America. This year, it was Aiden for boys and Sophia for girls. What's really disturbing, though, are some of the other names gaining in popularity.

Hey, fluffy newspaper editorial writers, you want Republicans and Democrats to "stop fighting" and "get something done," correct? Well, good news: the Congressional Black Caucus and Republicans might team up to kill the congressional ethics office! America is restored.

An Oberlin student and former American Apparel employee says that Dov Charney owes her one hundred dollars for services rendered. Below is her tale of wageless woe.

A production company is working with location-sharing service Foursquare to develop a reality show where Foursquare is "meaningfully integrated" into the action. How about a show where celebrities check-in somewhere then audience members race to punch them in the face.

Famed fetus vessel Bristol Palin ranted against the lamestream media on her Facebook page today. In a post entitled "Mr. Olbermann — Sorry We Can't All be As Perfect As You," Bristol proves that thin skin is an inherited trait.

Justin Bieber toys with the outward indicators of sexual maturity. Jermaine Jackson owes $100,000 in child support. Lady says she didn't boink Eva Longoria's husband. Aretha Franklin goes under the knife. TGIFriday gossip.

Chili farmer Gerald Fowler, who is, inexplicably, English, has grown the hottest chili pepper in the world: The Naga Viper, which, at 1,359,000 on the heat-measuring Scoville scale, is 270 times hotter than a jalapeño.

Eliseuson, of course, doesn't see what's wrong with his snowman at all! "It's just a snowman," he says. Totally! Just one of those great small-town snow-sculpture tributes to the classic SNL skit "Coneheads" that also makes a powerful statement about suicide by hanging.

You know what should definitely be the last thing that states should ever cut from their budgets? Money for life-saving organ transplants. In Arizona, cuts to state medicaid have literally stolen organ transplants from sick poor people.