Peter Falk, the actor who won four Emmys for playing endearingly exasperating detective Columbo on the hit TV series by the same name, died Thursday night at his Beverly Hills home. He was 83. In recent years he suffered from Alzheimer's disease, but a cause of death was not announced. Here's "one more thing" to remember him by.

Parties, parties, parties, Real Housewives love a party. Who doesn't? Well, maybe your old shut-in uncle. He only likes the Food Network and cutting pictures of Selena Gomez out of magazines. But all of tomorrow's parties were on Real Housewives last night, then Nico came back from the grave to try to eat everyone's brains.

While discussing Amy Winehouse's recent disaster concert in Belgrade on her E! public access talk show, comedian Chelsea Handler, and her panelists, said some offensive things about Serbia and its people, and those people are now angry.

Texas Governor and potential presidential candidate just wrapped up another legislative session dominated by anti-immigrant babble everywhere. But give him credit, as he went to address a Hispanic conference in person yesterday! If he does this again, though, he should probably tweak, or entirely replace, his icebreaker.

News arrives today that fancy gym Equinox is instructing all of its personal trainers to spend the next few weeks getting in extra-good shape, because the company is about to start making them wear fancy new "form-fitting tops" that will be unflattering to anyone with a stray millimeter of body fat. This is fantastic news, because it will cause the vain rich people who go to Equinox to select their personal trainers on the dumbest possible criteria.

Like something out of a Sam Raimi movie or a really dark version of Tom Sawyer, a Russian woman who was declared dead after collapsing with chest pains awoke at her own funeral and promptly died of a heart attack caused by the shock of waking up at her own funeral. Comically tragic or tragically comical? [Daily Mail]

The House of Representatives will actually hold two votes today on war funding. This is quite something: One vote to defund military action in Libya, another to authorize it for a year. Finally, many months after the Obama administration went into another MENA country with little-to-no strategy, we're having something akin to a congressional authorization process. This is healthy.

We've heard the rumor more than once—it usually comes up around the time for contract negotiations—but the evil specter of MTV recasting Jersey Shore is rearing its ugly head again. Would MTV ever actually go through with it?

Surprise! Cameron and Tyler Winklevoss were just kidding about giving up on their legal war against Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg over him allegedly stealing their idea for Facebook. They're actually just changing tactics, slightly.

Late Night can-do kid Jimmy Fallon has found success on television, and with that comes lots of money. Lots of money to buy vacation houses! Vacation houses like this $5.7 million Sagaponack home/apple orchard that he is said to be closing on.

Spiderman costars Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone might be banging. Cory Monteith was a teen junkie. Heidi Klum gets naked. LiLo plans her first post-imprisonment par-tay. TGIFriday gossip.

This Hollywood big shot is always finding boys to sleep with on the gay cruising app Grindr. This Real Housewife is a thief. And this actor is sending dirty texts. Getting laid is the No. 1 use of every iPhone in the world.

Have you seen this man, in the video above? If you watched television in the middle of the night during the 90s then you probably have! He's Don Lapre, professional TV con artist and the American Dream draped in a pastel polo shirt, and he was arrested last night in Arizona after a 24-hour run as a fugitive. On Wednesday, he didn't show up for his arraignment on charges of "conspiracy, mail fraud, wire fraud and promotional money laundering" connected to his marquee product, The Greatest Vitamin in the World. Shockingly, his product wasn't actually The Greatest Vitamin in the World, but rather it was a scam that netted him $52 million from over 220,000 gullible people.

This is Levon Sarkisyan's mugshot. The Connecticut native was arrested for breaking into a stranger's home, telling the owner that God made him do it, and then proceeding to smash statues of Roman soldiers and a marble table with a fireplace poker. Then he took a shower and dressed himself in the clothing of a deceased man who used to live there. When police took him into custody, he informed them that he'd smoked "a strange strand of herb."

So you're a kid, nice kid, hanging out with your little sister. A limo pulls up, door opens, and a guy who looks exactly like the president tells you to get inside, promises you he'll call your mom with his fancy presidential car phone. What do you do? Do you get in? Of course you get in! And magic happens. Duh. Stop being so suspicious of grown-ups all the time.

As he approached the 29,000-foot peak of Mt. Everest, climber Rodney Hogg discovered the frozen body of his old friend, Peter Kinloch — a 28-year-old from Scotland who died of frostbite and exhaustion scaling the same path just months before. He told The Mirror:

Last night, President Obama preempted regular programming so that we could all hear him talk about his plan to bring back 30,000 troops from Afghanistan by the end of next summer. But as Jon Stewart pointed out on tonight's Daily Show, people on both sides of the issue were disappointed with the budding Obama Doctrine.

What should have been just another interminable conversation between two mind-boggling A-holes took an intriguing turn down Rainbow Alley last night, when Fox News host (and self-loathing Gleek) Glenn Beck accidentally blurted out, "I could kiss you in the mouth" to Rick Santorum on Thursday's show. (It was in response to Santorum saying that he'd signed the "Cut, Cap and Balance" pledge, which is apparently the fiscal conservative equivalent of announcing, "I just scored a pair of Lady Gaga floor seats!")

Sean Parker's cocaine arrest is no secret. But the former Facebook president—who was played by Justin Timberlake in The Social Network—once had a wide range of addictions, he told Jimmy Fallon at a technology conference.

After years of oppression, rich people in LA are at last going to get the treatment they deserve. Also today: Superman has a new mom, Game of Thrones has a new queen, David O. Russell likes lookin' at the ladies, and some Good Wife news.