Two young women were charged with third-degree invasion of privacy today, after they allegedly captured and posted on Facebook a photo of elderly nursing home resident's genitals.

On tonight's Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert took Rick Santorum to task over some completely false statements that he has made in the name of speaking from his heart, statements like referring to a non-existent federal law mandating the use of English and claiming that the Dutch are involuntarily euthanizing their elderly. Like his takedown of John Kyl's "not intended to be a factual statement" moment, this is Colbert at his best.

In kind of a hodge-podge Daily Show segment, Jon Stewart zipped through two stories connected only by the thinnest of transitions: Syrian President Assad's email being hacked and the renaming of a small lake formerly known as Jew Pond. It still worked, though.

Nike apologized today after it received criticism for branding a pair of (pretty sweet-looking) limited edition sneakers "Black and Tans," in honor of St. Patrick's Day.

The Justice Department has conceded that a year of your life is worth just shy of $47,000. While that may not sound like a lot to those of you who live in New York, or even just like your lives, it's a hell of a lot higher than the $5,000 per year they were originally trying to play ball with.

Provo-Orem, Utah is the nation's most optimistic metropolitan area, according to the results of a Gallup poll released earlier this week. This could explain why Provo-Orem, Utah just doesn't "get" your cynical, Big City humor.

The British government is set to argue, in a landmark court case, that Christians have no inherent right to wear a cross or crucifix openly at work.

As part of our ongoing project to catalog the 2012 presidential election from a metal point of view, we've been soliciting presidential endorsements from noteworthy American metal musicians. Today: Exhumed.

Michael Sokolove's NYT Magazine cover story this week is about the decline of the casino gambling industry—overinvestment followed by the recession, and oversupply of casinos which raises competition for a declining amount of disposable income. What will this mean for state tax revenue? What will this mean for Native American tribes? What will this mean for gamblers with money burning holes in their pockets?

Even before all of Wall Street collapsed in September of 2008, bringing the national and global economy down with it, there was unemployment. Unemployment has always been a feature of this world. But since the whole "collapse of the economy" thing, it's been clear that if you lost your job, it was probably due to the nefarious work of economic villains far outside of your control. Not any more, though!

The former CEO of Time Warner famously called his company's merger with AOL the "worst deal of the century." But at least that was a combination of two profitable companies. The takeover we heard Twitter wanted to complete with Tumblr is far more baffling.

A new study from the CDC finds that deaths from gastoenteritis—"inflammation of the stomach and intestines that causes vomiting and diarrhea"—more than doubled between 1999 and 2007, to more than 17,000 per year. The majority of those deaths were due to hypervirulent strains of Clostridium difficile.

TMZ is reporting that the New Orleans Police Department has issued an arrest warrant for comedian Russell Brand after he allegedly grabbed a paparrazo's phone and hurled it through the window of a nearby office building earlier this week.

In the midst of his big wins last night, Rick Santorum offered up the nugget that reading from a teleprompter should be illegal for someone running for President. On tonight's Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert took that idea to its logical conclusion: that all book learnin' is evil, an idea to which Santorum is no stranger.

As discussed on tonight's Daily Show, Fox News decided not to cover the primaries last night but instead chose to focus on their standard whining about the liberal elite and President Obama's poll numbers and NPR. Yet, they somehow managed to scoop CNN on the primary results, even though CNN was reporting the returns before they were official, making CNN the biggest loser of the night.

The Washington Post has served up a juicy story about the secrecy surrounding the divorces of CIA agents and their non-spook spouses. Hoo-boy, is it worth a read.

What if the results of the 2012 election hinge not on which candidate is the most non-crazy or has the least bad ideas but, rather, on whose voice most puts voters in the mood for sensual seduction?

In case you didn't know, the President and Mrs. Obama are hearing a British appeal for the United States to return to its status as a crown colony tonight or, anyway, hosting a state dinner for Prime Minister David Cameron and his wife, Samantha.

The Guardian got its hands on a cache of violent Syrian despot Bashar al-Assad's emails from last year, and the upshot, so far, is that the guy bought a bunch of songs on iTunes. We made a Spotify playlist of them.

Three young men, to be exact, according to the source. They were all "summoned" to the mogul's apartment for some downlow fun. He was very enthusiastic about giving blow jobs and very effeminate, which is odd, considering his rep as a ladies' man. Our source says that he entertained his visitors "while his assistants typed on their laptops and waited for him to finish."