What was supposed to be an enjoyable sexual experience for a California woman and her boyfriend turned into a bloody, painful horror show that involved the untimely death of several innocent maxi pads and required a trip to the hospital. The alleged source of all this violence and anguish: a vengeful vibrator.
Zimbabwean Authorities have arrested three women for allegedly committing at least a dozen "ritualistic sex attacks" on male hitchhikers over a two-year period. For their rituals, the women reportedly collected used condoms and stashed them in "the boot of a car." Don't they have a Container Store in Zimbabwe?
Republican Florida state Rep. Brad Drake entered a Waffle House and emerged a man with ideas. Bold ideas, about breakfast. But also some ideas on how to kill Florida's death row inmates with firing squads. Regular Florida folks might be tapped to help shoot some of these condemned critters, because government employees shouldn't have all the fun.
You know how on Wednesday the the Obama administration accused Iran of planning the assassination of the Saudi ambassador on U.S. soil, leading to a renewed call for sanctions against the country? Turns out that "hard evidence" of the Iranian government's involvement in the plot "is scant." But don't worry! U.S. officials have analyzed the situation and think it's "more than likely" that at least a couple important people knew about the conspiracy.
America is angry! The protest that started nearly a month ago in Lower Manhattan has been spreading over the past week, and occupiers armed with Guy Fawkes masks and Sharpies can now be found in most major (and minor) cities across the U.S. and Canada. Here are some photos from the protests over the past few days.
Who says an 89-year-old can't get into the rap game? Betty White's latest tour de force is this music video for "I'm Still Hot," a duet with the British singer Luciana. But don't think that White's venture into hip hop is all fun and games: The project benefits one of White's favorite charities, the Los Angeles Zoo. [via Idolator]
Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan passed right near each other last month—millions of miles above earth. Not because they were launched into space by some kind of, I don't know, space... cannon? But because they are asteroids!
"I was raised to believe that there are no limits to individual achievement and no excuses to justify indifference," reads a message on Massachusetts Senator Scott Brown's website. Weirdly, former North Carolina Senator Elizabeth Dole said the exact same thing in her Senate campaign announcement speech in 2002. Which leads us to wonder: Is Scott Brown Bob Dole's Wife?
What would happen if illegal immigrants from Mexico concluded that economic conditions in the U.S. were just as bad—or worse—than those in their native country and decided to return home en masse? How would the US Border Patrol deal with a reverse immigration crisis? That was the plot of tonight's South Park, and you'll find answers to both those questions in the highlight reel above.
Here's the trailer for Albert Nobbs, a period drama from director Rodrigo Garcia. Set in 19th century Ireland, the movie stars Glenn Close as the title character, a woman who poses as a man so she can work as a butler in Dublin's fanciest hotel. But when someone finds out her secret, and she falls in love with a woman who happens to be involved with another man, well, things get complicated.
Which movies have been illegally downloaded the most? If you said "a bunch of mediocre sci-fi/fantasy blockbusters," well, you're wrong! It's, actually, "a bunch of mediocre sci-fi/fantasy blockbusters and, also, The Hangover."
Don't let this keep you from occupying Wall Street, because banks are still awful, but Citi helpfully lent its data to reveal the true cost of eating at expensive restaurants. Finance blogger Felix Salmon dove into anonymized credit card slips and found that people fling money around as unpredictably as wild monkeys in these places.
The Occupy Wall Street-affiliated "Millionaire's March" didn't stop by New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg's townhouse on the Upper East Side (or, for that matter, his massive Bermudan estate), but that's okay! Mayor Mike dropped by the permanent occupation at Zuccotti Park on Wednesday evening to say "hi" and join the drum circle.
Something is rotten in the state of New York. Specifically, upstate. People in the Buffalo area keep crashing their cars into buildings, and nobody can explain it.
Universal's crazy Tower Heist plot will not come to fruition. Also today: A Disney princess makes progress with her very own grownup show, three of your least favorite shows will live a little longer, and Ben Stiller has lots of ghosts, which one you need?
Just when you think that Manhattan is totally safe for gays, you hear about an awful verbal attack that you just can't believe. And in super gay Hell's Kitchen for that matter. Did the two men who were called "fags" in a CVS this morning do the right thing?
