• Dennis Rodman reveals that his ex-wife Carmen Electra has a tendency to insert penne pasta in her lovers' asses. Happy Columbus Day! [Lowdown]
• Long Island's favorite alcoholic, singer Billy Joel, was once so depressed that he drank furniture polish. Sadly, he didn't drink quite enough and instead went on to destroy several innocent trees with his car. [Page Six]
• Having sacked supermodel Kate Moss after she graced the cover of the Daily Mirror with a rolled 5-note shoved up her nose, Burberry considers actress Rachel Weisz as the face of their next campaign. [R&M (3rd item)]
• Brad Pitt has bought some sort of batcave in the wilds of Canada, where he's instructed bodyguards to stalk any paparazzi following around the actor. [Page Six]
• Former gossipista Deborah Schoeneman's forthcoming roman chef features a character called Tim, "An already jaded, near-alcoholic gossip writer with no boundaries." Wonder who that could be based on. No, really, we do wonder: Find us a gossip boy who doesn't fit that description. [Gatecrasher]

GAWKER EXCLUSIVE!!! For your viewing pleasure, we're proud to present the first publicity stills from the set of Vogue editor Anna Wintour's cinematic gang-bang debut, The Wintour 500.

If Kate Moss knows what's good for her, she might stay at Arizona's Meadows rehab center indefinitely. The UK's Sun reports today that upon her return to Britain, the once-super model will be arrested under suspicion of supplying cocaine.

In this week's installment of New York mag's style pages for the common man, the Look Book, we're introduced to Ronald Whitfield, the number two man for the NYC Department of Corrections union. Describing his style as "mature conservative," Whitfield isn't a fan of the baggy-pants prison style but sure loves him some haberdashery before a night in with the latest episode of CSI (Oz, however, is a little too realistic). He's also given a lot of thought to the prison plights of Martha Stewart versus Lil' Kim, which means we might have something in common with Ron after all. After the jump, Intern Alexis wrangles Steven Chen, Katie Halper, and Daniel Levin Becker for comment on Whitfield's Stacy Adams shoes.

The French-designed hooded sweatshirts featured above will be available, by order, in a few weeks — just long enough for the MTA to think of the appropriate, enforceable ban on them.

At this point, we're plum out of original commentary on supermodel Kate Moss's "alleged" cocaine use, except for the fact that we find media reports of the incident utterly absurd in that they still referring to the whole thing as "alleged." There's really nothing alleged about it: The Daily Mirror published photographs of her bumping lines, Kate Moss has apologized for her indiscretions, and now a video of the incident has made its way to European television outlets and, in turn, the internet. If you've never seen a Brian DePalma movie, you'll find the footage (from an Italian newscast) highly educational. Otherwise, it's nothing you haven't already seen on a Saturday night.

We've always felt that the mannequins at Bloomingdale's were a bit too fat for our taste. A butterball on display in designer threads certainly isn't going to inspire us to open our pockets, you know. That's why we absolutely adore the mannequins at Stella McCartney's store, made in the mold of the ideal customer, sharp collarbone and malnourished breastplate included. It's aspirational hunger, people — buy it!

• Did Sienna Miller miscarry cheating beau Jude Law's baby? Perhaps, although it's equally likely that if there was the loss of a baby, it might've been a bit more intentional. We're just sayin'. [R&M]
• Tara Reid lashes out at the media yet again for its insistence on portraying the Taradise star as a demented lush. Yes, dear media, it's your fault she morphed into a human tequila popper and can't score a decent gig to save her left tit. [Page Six]
• Demi Moore's wedding to little brother Ashton Kutcher has been confirmed. Sorry. [Fox 411]
• Even more disappointing is word that OK! has paid an absurd $3 million for rights to the demonic marriage ritual. Meanwhile, Katrina evacuees could use some blankets. [Lowdown]
• Supermodel Carmen Kass fainted backstage at the Prada show in Milan. Hunger tends to do that to you. [Page Six]

If you haven't already, you might want to familiarize yourself with The Party Party, a remix project featuring vocals from the administration's finest. The White Lines track appropriately features a voice-over from George W. Bush, highlighted by the following lyrics:

Just remember, you first heard it on a random blog 3 or 4 days ago: Supermodel Kate Moss, whose talent for cutting and bumping lines of cocaine has been recently documented, has entered the Meadows rehab center just outside of Phoenix, Arizona. Reportedly costing over $4000 a day, the clinic is just slightly more expensive than Moss' coke habit and will hopefully provide the sniffly lass with some much-needed time away from her crackheaded, kinda-erstwhile boyfriend, rocker Pete Doherty.

• Britain's Sky television plans on showing a Kate Moss documentary that includes actual footage of the supermodel blowing her couture rails. We're not sure this is worth your time; if you simply print out all the images from the Mirror and assemble them, in order, you can have a handy animated flipbook. Much cooler, we think. [Reuters]
• It's a dream come true: High Times is looking for an editorial assistant. Now if only interested parties were motivated enough to put together a resume. [Craigslist]
• Clear your mind. Inhale, exhale, and go blank. Now: What's the first phrase that pops into your head? "Christian Mime Ministry?" Why, us too! [AllThingsChristie]
• You might find this hard to believe, but Jackass sidekick Steve-O got drunk. On television. Crazy, we know — but at least worth a snickering watch. [CC Insider]

Ladies and gentleman, feast your eyes upon the wreckage that is Jasmine Golestaneh, a musician (of course) who prides herself on a fashion sense which resembles a "semi-catastrophic" accident. In this week's edition of New York mag's Look Book, Jasmine confesses her predilection to finding garments in the street, speaking to clothing, and bossing around her bandmates. After the jump, Intern Alexis grills Rachel Hardage and Sheraz Shere for some fashionable policing.

How awesome is Tara Subkoff? She acts in random-ass indie flicks, creates random-ass clothing for Imitation of Christ, designs random-ass shoes for Easy Spirit, and now she's making completely wonderful, random-ass comments on the record. At a Saturday panel during the New Yorker festival, Subkoff sat with fellow designers Alice Roi and Behnaz Sarafpour and stole the show by being catty, rude, insolent, and our freaking hero. A sampling of Subkoff's adorable impertinence:

Reports a pal from within 4 Times Sqaure today:

Today in Kate Moss' big cokey adventure, the Queen of All That Is Sane, Salon's Rebecca Traister, gets to the point:

The fallout from last week's Daily Mirror photo spread of model Kate Moss enjoying a healthy line or twelve of cocaine continues, as stalwart label Burberry followed Chanel and H&M in dropping Moss from their campaign. Cosmetics company Rimmel is also reviewing their contract with Moss, having officially expressed their dismay with the model for clearly wearing Clinique eyeshadow while being photographed blowing rails.

Things just keep getting worse for (former?) supermodel Kate Moss. After her coke-sniffing mug was featured on the cover of the UK's Daily Mirror last week, mega-retailer H&M has dropped Moss from their upcoming campaign and it seems that Chanel is following suit, refusing to renew Moss' contract in October. Moss still has a deal with cosmetics company Rimmel but, at this rate, we doubt that'll last much longer.

Spelling is such a subjective thing.
Considering porny retailer Dov Charney's whole schtick revolves around the fact that his American Apparel is made in America, we find the above photo of stock arriving at the new store on 23rd Street to be rather amusing.

In this week's edition of New York magazine's Look Book, we meet Pete Kress, your friendly neighborhood bouncer. Pete considers his style "rico suave," likes pig carcasses, and comes complete with tattoos and pit bull. But we bet you already knew all that just by looking at him. After the jump, Intern Alexis grills Aziz Ansari, Jen Adams, and Christina Kallery for their tips and tricks for making Petey a pretty boy.

Overlooking Ground Zero, September 18, 2005: