Once upon a time there was hip hop clothing, worn by hip hop heads. As hip hop's popularity grew, that evolved into the nebulous "streetwear" category, worn not only by hip hop heads, but by everyone from downtown club kids to secretly rich trust fund hipster kids to skateboard rats. It's all a big mess! And all that crossing over amongst the formerly well-established, segregated categories of identity has inspired streetwear makers like LRG [via Satchel of Gravel] to do something totally uncalled for: create hoodies with built-in masks, in a misguided attempt at edginess that succeeds only in evoking the villains in the Karate Kid movie. The last straw? The newest one, featuring a wolf motif, complete with ears. Too much. Proof: These three mask hoodies, in ascending order of un-necessity:

ESPN Magazine is celebrating its tenth anniversary, and you know what that means: it's finally time to become a leader on the fashion scene. Really! The magazine is hiring its first "style director" and increasing its fashion coverage [WWD] because, as they explain rather doubtfully, "People want to know what athletes are wearing to and from the ballpark." What will the sports-centric mag's style look like? We're guessing that the hat that they put on Alex Rodriguez for the issue's cover is a pretty reliable guide to their future in high fashion:

Stereotypical hipster brand American Apparel has always walked the fine line between sexiness and porn with its ads (like the one pictured). Or gone over the line, depending on your perspective. But now the anonymous prankster that earlier posted a fake finger-in-the-butt AA billboard has struck again, helping the company along its inevitable path to becoming a full-blown pornography producer. Why beat around the bush? Heh. After the jump, the two new naked AA ad spoofs [via Copyranter] that have appeared in downtown NYC. Possibly NSFW, if you consider simple line drawings to fit in that category.

Yes, the fashion industry is just like high school, and Times fashion critic Cathy Horyn not only said it but proved it this morning with an article detailing, in no less than 1,400 words, her own petty squabble with designer Giorgio Armani. Aramani appears to be, by far, the pettier of the two, having banned Horyn from his fashion shows over a rough review in January and having sent a bitchy letter to her bosses. But Horyn has also been catty, writing repeated melodramatic accounts of the feud and casting Armani as something of a 1980s has-been, even as she puts on analytical airs. Here's a quick summary, in Horyn and Armani's own words, of their hissy little slapfest:

Designer Christian Siriano won $100,000 and America's secretly gay heart on Bravo's Project Runway by being the sassiest bitch on the show (and, OK, with some genius design work). A competitor designed clothes suitable for a "tranny ice queen," he said, and everything else was a "hot mess," "tranny mess" or "fierce." Siriano believes his "distinctive attitude served as a form of personal branding," according to a new profile in the Advocate. That's hard to dispute, given that runway queen has already been parodied on Saturday Night Live. But it's possible to brand too effectively, as SNL's Amy Poehler demonstrated when she mocked the designer's repetitive language. Siriano has apparently responded by ditching his favorite catchphrase "fierce" and replacing it with "I'm gonna stab you," uttered eight times in front of the Advocate's writer vs. zero use of "fierce." Wise, but maybe Siriano should just drop the catchphrases altogether and focus on designing clothes. Here's SNL's imitation of the up-and-coming fashion maven:

The NYT's T Magazine has a handy graphic breaking down the fashion styles of indie rockers, and confirming once and for all that nobody should aspire to be an indie rocker. Each band profiled corresponds to a luxury brand. Doesn't that violate some sort of tenet of indie cred? PLUS they are all matched with smiley fashion slogans summing up their look, which just makes you realize that it is always an unwise decision for a band to agree to participate in a story in T Magazine. Below, a picture of each band and their supposed "look"; which is most preposterous? [I vote "Williamsburg prep"]

Happy news for fellas who just like to lay back with a cold one and soak up the rays: Stoner romantic comedy actor Matthew McConaughey is launching his own clothing line, called j.k. livin [Us]. The "j.k." stands for "just keep," and the "livin" stands for the recognition that stressing out over things like grammar can totally kill the leisurely pace at which life should be enjoyed. So far it looks like the line just features a half ass t-shirt, but hey, why worry? In a complementary move, McConaughey's girlfriend, Brazilian model Camila Alves, has launched her own line of astoundingly pricey handbags. Together, these items will bring the pleasures of Hollywood to you, the consumer. Photos of her $1,350 monstrosities, and her man's halfhearted t-shirt/ wristband set, after the jump.

Designer Jill Stuart may have had enough of Lindsay Lohan's slutty shenanigans! Stuart signed the persistently famous Lohan on as the face of her brand for a big ad campaign last year, but now she is reportedly looking at Hilary Swank as a "more professional image" for her next campaign [Mixed Media]. A double standard could be in effect; a lifetime of drug use and crazy behavior by Rolling Stone Keith Richards hasn't prevented him from being picked as the new face of Louis Vuitton. If a luxury brand wants a wild celebrity fronting it, shouldn't they at least pick an attractive one? After the jump, a visual comparison of Lohan's ads with Richards' ad. See if you can tell which has lived harder.

Reliably obtuse New York Times writer, Cathy Horyn, has surpassed herself this time. Here's the latest lede from the fashion critic: "If fashion strikes people as a separate language, if not a funny Xanadu, it's hardly surprising. The last days of the fall ready-to-wear season were loud and lugubrious, with designers talking in volumes." Translation, anyone?

Supermodel Heidi Klum signed on to be the face (and ass) of Jordache last year. They needed the help; Jordache was really cool when I was in elementary school, and since then, not so much. The company has been pushing Klum's ads everywhere—today, there's a half page spot in the Post adjacent to Page Six. Which makes it all the more pressing to answer the question: What happened to her nipples? Jordache has chosen to offset the fact that Klum is doing topless ads by simply making her nipples disappear, which is eerie, bad for children's educations, and, frankly, un-American. Sports Illustrated does some photo magic for its swimsuit issue, but this is more blatant and disturbing. The offending ads are after the jump; please advise your kids that this is not natural.

Have you ever drunk lime-flavored Bacardi? Worn Timberland boots? Made a web site? WELL STOP BITING FROM PRODIGY OF MOBB DEEP YOU FAKE ASS SHOOK ONE. HOW DARE YOU QUESTION HIS TREND SETTING? It turns out that Prodigy, the soon-to-be-jailed Queens rapper, is responsible for many of the innovations in music, clothing, and the world at large, so SHOW SOME RESPECT.

Kanye West does not just rap, write books and honor his dead mother, he is also a very active fashion blogger, but for some reason the fashion world is just cruel in return. Partly it's because they maybe misinterpret his praise as criticism, like when he awarded the "illest shoe award" to some Balenciaga sandals and then couldn't get into their show. Other times designers turn down his fashion show ticket requests because, West speculated in the Times, his massive stardom would overwhelm their shows. Luckily Stella McCartney and Viktor & Rolf aren't haters like that, but it's still kind of sad and warped that a Grammy-awad-winning musician is scraping for a fraction of the respect afforded to, say, BrianBoy. It's not like West isn't enthusiastic about the trade. Here are some recent designs that, West wrote on his blog, are to die for:

The issue of fancy men's underwear is still threatening to undermine this great country. Andrew Christian has unveiled his new, horrific men's underwear with Flashback Butt-Lifting and Contouring Technology. He promises that it "gives men the illusion of having a sought-after "bubble butt" without having to spend hours in the gym." Great John Wayne's ghost, is a bubble butt now sought-after among men?!? An actual quote from the designer, who is suspected by me to be working with the terrorists: "Surprisingly, I was actually inspired to create this technology while at the gym and seeing how hard men work on exercising their buttocks. I just knew that there had to be a way to achieve similar results by simply wearing underwear." Good. God. After the jump, before and after pictures of the new underwear technology at work. We beg you, do not be seduced.

Vogue's editor is too jealous of her icy mystery to expose herself much in public. She gives few interviews, and shows up to fashion events shielded by a helmet of hair and dark sunglasses. That makes Wintour's appearance before the Oxford Union, a debate club which is a playground for future British politicians, all the more unusual.

We must hand it to Will Ferrell. Having just delivered another homerun performance as Chaz Bobby Burgundy the Tank in Semi-Pro, the actor is already thinking ahead to his next project, promoting the just -started -filming Land of the Lost adaptation by wearing this Enik- the- Sleestak- inspired smocksuit to last night's premiere. For purists worried that their beloved, Saturday morning memories of the Marshalls, Cha-Ka, and the rest of the Lost gang might be tainted by crass Hollywood cynicism, fear not: The delightful premise, in which Ferrell stars as an arrogant, womanizing movie star cast in a remake of the Sid and Marty Krofft series, only to discover that real Sleestaks (Vince Vaughn, Ben Stiller) exist among us, is post-modern self-referential hilarity at its finest!

When you're five months pregnant, sheer fabrics and subtlety don't exactly go together. But Nicole Kidman, seen here promoting The Golden Compass in Japan yesterday, is brazen! She will show you her baby bump and you will like it! On the opposite side of the spectrum is Nicole's replacement, Katie Holmes, who wore a Look Ma, I'm Not Pregnant silk dress to last night's Costume Designer's Guild Awards. How tight was it? So tight that we now possess the knowledge that Tom Cruise prefers his women to wear low-cut cotton undies. But putting their triumphant maternal updates aside, what's with Tom's paramours and their preference for Auntie Mame numbers?

Evidence that bobbed, steely Vogue editor Anna Wintour is out of her gourd: She believes that John McCain, Hillary Clinton, and Barack Obama are all "superheroes." For being a P.O.W., or a woman, or a black, or whatever. Hey, okay. But one man in fashion is not standing for the whole environment of fear surrounding Wintour, which makes it impossible for anyone remotely connected with the industry to insult her. Giorgio Armani says: Who cares about that crazy lady?

Carine Roitfeld, French Vogue's editor for the last seven years, is the cooler, slightly younger, doesn't-give-a-fuck version of uptight American Vogue editor Anna Wintour. And hey: nobody made a moviebook about how bitchy she is. Not only is Carine totes different, but her whole magazine is pretty much better. Everybody in the fashion industry knows this already, but she very Frenchily explains what's wrong with American fashion editors to New York mag. (Oh, and: contrary to popular belief, she does not weigh her female staffers, but it is true that she doesn't know how to use a computer).

New York has found five people who wear only one color exclusively. Freaks! ("I feel messy and unclean if I wear other colors," says a gray-colored designer). Welp, guess she found the all-green-wearing person she was looking for... [NY Mag]

This flowchart, designed to answer the question "Do you dress like a Douchebag?", is brilliant for any number of reasons, but high up on the list has to be the sequence that goes "Are you wearing a skirt? (yes)/Are you a woman? (no)/Are you Scottish? (yes)/Are you wearing undies (no)/Awesome." [Arabian Monkey]