Samsung says Lisette Lee, the Beverly Hills woman caught with 500 lbs. of marijuana on her Gulfstream jet, is lying about being an heiress to their fortune. Hollywood acquaintances say she's been calling herself one for years.

Lisette Lee arrived in Ohio from Beverly Hills on a chartered jet carrying $500,000 worth of marijuana. False eyelashes fluttering, she claimed to be an electronics heiress. But she used to use a different name and be an actress.

Gather round, unhappily married men, because the FDA has issued a report on flibanserin, the real live "Female Viagra" that will usher in a new golden age of raw, dirty once-per-month sexing.

Researchers are mapping rock star Ozzy Osbourne's genome hoping to learn something about how the hell he survived, despite all the drugs, and the bat heads. Hopefully they will also figure out what made Master of Reality so bitching. [CBS]

Andrew Auernheimer, a.k.a. "weev," a member of the group that exploited a major flaw in AT&T's 3G network last week, was arrested on Monday on felony drug charges. Police say Auernheimer had cocaine, ecstasy, and LSD in his possession. [CNET]

Two Ugandan nuns, Sisters Nanteza and Rita, were arrested this week for growing weed on the grounds of their convent, which they told police was used for farm animals. Natenza attacked the officers for entering the convent without her permission.

A rookie NYPD officer, who was fired after testing positive for cocaine use, says he drank coca tea but was "unaware of the tea's connection with cocaine." His girlfriend's mom gave him the Mate de Coca. [NYDN]

Louisiana prison inmate Joe Lewis, perhaps inspired by The Butt Smuggler, was caught trying to sneak cigarettes, four muscle relaxers and chewing tobacco back into jail inside his prosthetic leg from a work release program. Four pills? Weak. [TheTownTalk]

Larry King's wife, Shawn King, overdosed on pills on May 28, according to RadarOnline. In a recording of the 911 call, her father tells the operator "I can't wake her up," and "I don't think she did it on purpose."

There was a time when running a sex club out of your apartment where guests played with fire and dressed in rubber suits was cool. Not anymore. At least not to one man, who viciously attacked Dmitri's Apartment with feces.

Police in the West African nation The Gambia seized a two ton stash of cocaine, valued at $1 billion, and called in agents from Britain's Serious Organised Crime Agency for help with the investigation. Somewhere, Amy Winehouse is crying. [BBC]

Three days in jail can seem like a lifetime. So before 24-year-old Gavin Stanger surrendered to authorities in Washington state for a misdemeanor disorderly conduct charge, he crammed some goodies up his ass to help pass the time.

Gossip Girl pretty boy Chace Crawford was arrested last night in Plano, Texas for misdemeanor marijuana possession at a place called Ringo's Pub. (Sadly, not a gay bar.) He had "one unlit joint," according to TMZ. Here's his crabby mugshot.

Police in Texas have arrested two men with a truck carrying 147 assault rifles, 10,000 rounds of ammunition, and 53 bayonets (what?!) bound for Mexico. Over 23,000 people have died in Mexico's drug war since 2006. [BBC, pic]

Yesterday, we asked you what Ted Haggard's big announcement could possibly be. There was great speculation! Well, he's starting a new church with the novel idea of helping people (and pulling in some cash), because "something is better than nothing."

There are so many things you can find at the beach. Shells! Sea glass! Driftwood! And, uh, cocaine: A beachcomber in Galveston, Texas, stumbled across a bag with 16 bricks of coke—an estimated $2.1 million haul.

A new study found that caffeine addicts don't actually get an energy boost from their morning cup of coffee; instead, it just mitigates their withdrawal symptoms. Bullshit. Okay, fine, whatever...I'm not gonna debate you this early in the morning. [Reuters]

Cancun Mayor Gregorio Sanchez was forced to withdraw his candidacy for governor of the state of Quintana Roo after being arrested on organized crime charges and accused of protecting drug gangs. Bloomberg doesn't seem so bad now, does he? [AP]

Feeling young and free while blowing lines in the bathroom of some glitzy LES rat hole? Well, you won't look young for long. Scientists are finding that 80% of impure cocaine in the US contains a chemical that rots flesh.

POP 2010 The Dream—featuring LiLo pal Steve Aoki and an Israeli trance band with the unfortunate name Infected Mushroom—drew 16,500 people last weekend. One man died and 70 were arrested for selling drugs. Wait… raves still exist?