Would you look at this: Somebody said something outlandish on CNN. Today’s heroes are the so-called “Stump For Trump” duo: Lynette “Diamond” Hardaway and Rochelle “Silk” Richardson, who rose from their YouTube channel to opening for Trump at his fundraisers and today went on CNN to offer the notion that Marco Rubio lived a “gay lifestyle.”

Donald Trump and Chris Christie today held a joint press conference, ostensibly to announce Christie’s endorsement, but effectively to roast the hell out of Marco Rubio.

Chris Christie today endorsed Donald Trump for president by giving a speech about Hillary Clinton.

Big boy (who is sick of being treated like a little kid!!) Marco Rubio is mad. So mad, in fact, that he spent a good four minutes of his stump speech this morning trying to rail on Donald Trump. This included—but was not limited to—reading Trump’s misspelled tweets from his phone, effectively calling Trump a spoiled wimp, and insinuating that Trump urinated on himself during last night’s debate. Welcome to hell.

If this whole “being president” thing doesn’t work out, Donald Trump’s company is ready to get the big man back in the casino business. A capital idea!

Exhibit 1:

Earlier this week, LawNewz.com unearthed a $125 million federal sexual assault lawsuit, filed against Donald Trump in 1997, which alleges that the real estate developer violated the plaintiff’s “physical and mental integrity” by touching her intimately, without her consent, after her boyfriend entered into a business relationship with him.

Very presidential.

After getting manhandled early in the debate, Marco Rubio finally found a way to get under Trump’s skin—by bringing up the defunct, fraudulent “Trump University.”

The final Republican debate before so-called next week’s “Super Tuesday” series of primaries got real rowdy real quick, with Marco Rubio attacking Donald Trump over his having hired undocumented immigrants to work on one of his real estate projects in the 1980s.

Donald Trump would—probably!—like you to believe that his constant tangential connection to racism is a coincidence, rather than a direct function of his presidential campaign. Alas, things keep happening that sure seem to point to the contrary.

As Donald Trump surges in the polls, Canada is trying to make it even easier for anyone, even a horrified American, to obtain Canadian citizenship—a total coincidence, I’m sure.

Donald Trump continues to shore up support in the coveted “openly white supremacist” demographic this week, as former KKK Grand Wizard (and former Louisiana state congressman!) David Duke urges his supporters to vote for the man with the orange face.

Late last year, on December 10, Donald Trump briefly slipped away from the public eye to give a closed-door, pretrial deposition in a class-action lawsuit filed against him in California, Yahoo News reports, relating to the now-defunct Trump University.

Speaker of literally dozens of words Melania Trump is her husband’s biggest supporter—despite the fact that she doesn’t seem to actually understand what Donald Trump’s platforms are. And apparently, it’s better that way. Because as Buzzfeed News reported earlier today, back in 2006, Melania Trump donated $2,000 to Clinton’s then-campaign committee, Friends of Hillary.

Representative Duncan Hunter (R-Calif.), the vaping congressman in the pocket of big vape, today blew a sick cloud of e-ndorsement over the Donald Trump campaign.

Back in May of 2001, culmination of our collective misdeeds Donald Trump called in to Howard Stern’s Radio Show to plug the upcoming Miss Universe competition. But when Trump learned that the day’s guest host was gossip columnist A.J. Benza (the same man whose girlfriend Trump had “stolen” several years back), what started as an innocent promotion quickly devolved into a disgusting display of dick-measuring. Donald Trump hasn’t changed a bit.

The future First Lady of the United States Melania Trump said some new words in an exclusive interview with her husband’s close personal friend and Morning Joe host Mika Brzezinski this morning. “It’s amazing what’s going on,” she said of the campaign. “We’re having fun.”

Donald Trump has won the Republican presidential caucuses in Nevada, the Associated Press reports. Marco Rubio and Ted Cruz are still vying for second.

On Tuesday, as Glenn Beck was speaking on behalf of Ted Cruz, Donald Trump barged into the gymnasium at Palo Verde High School in Summerlin, Nevada, to glad-hand and distract everyone from voting for anyone other than himself.