The strike is over! Everyone's back to work! As expected, the WGA voted overwhelmingly to dance off the pickets lines and back to their sitcom writers rooms, deadline-rushed screenplays begging for punch-up, and blank Final Draft screens, with 92.5% of its membership agreeing to usher in a new, internet-enabled era of peace, love and shared prosperity that will last between four months and three years, when an ugly battle over a yet-discovered content-delivery platform (we're thinking gamma rays will be involved!) once again shakes the industry to its very foundation. Variety solicits the post-strike reflections of dangerously charismatic CBS despot Les Moonves, one of the moguls credited with hammering out the deal with the Guild:

Is it possible to feel bad for a Hilton? Prior to this afternoon, the answer to that question would've been a resounding no. However, the way that Rick and Kathy Hilton are hanging poor little Barron out to dry is making us reconsider. In case you haven't heard, the Hilton parents are refusing to bail him out of jail under the auspices of Tough Love. This strikes us as being rankly hypocritical in the face of the support that they gave to their convicted felon of a daughter last summer. While we still firmly believe that Barron is a jackanapes and not really deserving of public sympathy, it's an abomination that Kathy Hilton is sitting at home painting her nails while her son sits behind bars. UPDATE (5:53pm): Barron just got sprung from the pokey by his friends, who managed to find a bail bondsman and drum up the $20,000 necessary to free him. [Pagesix.com]

Supremely confident that tonight's WGA vote will end the writers strike and finally free him of the three-month-long recurring nightmare in which he's forced to personally read the names of this year's Oscar winners to an empty Kodak Theatre while wearing nothing but a tattered tuxedo t-shirt, ecstatic producer Gil Cates triumphantly declared at today's production meeting that the Academy will put on its "A" show , officially scrapping plans for the clip-heavy, star-deficient backup ceremony everyone feared might take place.

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in often—the fate of the universe relies upon it! Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time Andy Dick asked if he could Adrian the Grenier out of you.

You didn't think Everybody's Suing Everybody Day was over yet, did you? It's time to ratchet things up a notch, and pit giant studio against giant studio! Fox has filed suit against Warner Bros. over Alan Moore's graphic novel Watchmen. Warner already has their version of the superhero story in the pipeline for 2009, directed by 300's Zack Snyder with a cast that reunites Little Children's Jackie Earle Haley and Patrick Wilson. Fox, meanwhile, claims they bought exclusive rights to the property in the late '80s, and that producer Lawrence Gordon never paid the full buy-out price that would have allowed him to shop it around. They want nothing less than the production to be shelved, with not even Zach's personal pledge that he won't "gay it up like my last graphic novel adaptation" enough to sway their made-up minds. [THR]

· Music round-up: Rufus Wainwright at the Wiltern; Drive-By Truckers at Avalon; Common at House of Blues; Rhett Miller at Largo ·Gather with several hundred of your fellow Janice Dickinson Model Agency fans (there have to be at least that many, right?) at Central Hollywood for the Official Season Three Finale Party.
· At the Hammer, celebrate Anais Nin's 105th birthday with a discussion of her cultural legacy led by a panel consisting of musician Bebe Barron, writer Deena Metzger and architect Eric Lloyd Wright.

Katherine Heigl is not a doctor, but she plays one on TV. Scratch that, we just learned that she plays one in real-life, too! The Emasculation of Joshua Tour never fails to disappoint, as evidenced by Joshua's admission to People that it was none other than Katherine who diagnosed him with Attention Deficit Disorder, thereby saving him from a life of scribbling doodles for spare change:

Steven Spielberg has long been attached to the 2008 summer games in Beijing, his wizardry over childlike wonder™ secured by organizers for their opening ceremonies. The decision greatly angered Mia Farrow, who blamed the Sudanese-backing Chinese government of helping to fund the Darfur genocide; in a now-famous WSJ op-ed from last March, she likened the Schindler's List director to Nazi propagandist Leni Riefenstahl for agreeing to work with a regime with so much blood on its hands. Minutes ago, news broke that Spielberg would be pulling out of the Olympics, citing Darfur as the reason. His statement follows after the jump:

Leave it to the ladies of The View to somehow connect the dots between Amy Winehouse, anti-Semitic poets, and something Joy has termed "Restless Arm Syndrome." Following Amy's big night at the Grammys, a spirited debate broke out regarding the age old conundrum of whether or not artists should be publicly lauded if they also happen to be drug addicts. While we are thankful that those questions never get raised about bloggers, Hot Topics such as these are tailor made to bring out the best — and by best, we mean worst — in this Hasselbeck-less stable of bittys.

To help celebrate the premiere of the The Real World's upcoming Hollywood-set season where the series can abandon the already-flimsy pretense its houseguests are there for any reason other than attracting the attention of personal-appearance agents who find mall-opening star-quality in their ability to fight with and/or fuck their castmates, MTV is throwing The Real World Awards Bash: Roast 'Em and Toast 'Em on March 29. It's an awards show! And a roast! And a...toast! Polling is now open on MTV.com, where viewers can vote for their favorite melodramatic phonecall that messily ended a long-distance relationship, drunken altercation with law-enforcement officials annoyed by the presence of a camera crew, and hot-tub orgy that threatened the reproductive health of all involved. (We're really pulling for the Vegas season's Steven, Trishelle and Brynn three-way for that last category.)

We now return to the Everybody's Suing Everybody Day festivities with the ongoing feud between Kathleen Turner and Nic Cage, the former having accused the latter in her upcoming autobiography of having several DUI and dog-snatching marks on his personal record. An irate Cage quickly issued a denial, out of concern that Turner's tales might render his many impressionable young fans incapable of separating truth from fiction: The last thing the world needs is a spate of renegade Chihuahuanappings, or, heaven's forfend, a troubling new trend in which confused teens light their heads on fire before embarking on stolen-motorcycle joyrides. Perhaps to fully hammer his message home, Cage has now filed a "defamaton, libel and slander" suit against his Peggy Sue Got Married co-star in British court:

· In what could be a dream match of creative team and quirky literary material, Joel and Ethan Coen will adapt Michael Chabon's The Yiddish Policemen's Union for Columbia, a "noir-style murder mystery in which a rogue cop investigates the killing of a heroin-addicted chess prodigy who might be the messiah" set in a Jewish settlement in Alaska. (Are we allowed to get pre-excited about this one?) [Variety]
· Though Ugly Betty was among the nine series ABC picked up for next season on Monday, the network ruined executive producers Marco Pennette and James Hayman's back-to-work party by dropping them from the show. [THR]

We hope it's not too soon to pronounce the once-flatlining Oscars fully recovered, tipped upright by an attending nurse, who then removed the IV needle that maintained his celebrity-malnourished frame from his golden arm. All this is wonderful news, especially in light of what was quickly turning out to be the most depressingly atrophied trophy season in Hollywood history—where something as trivial as a bored-to-drunken-action Sean Young being escorted out of the Hyatt Regency became the year's most discussed awards show moment. Young, of course, has since exiled herself to a hecklers wellness facility, but her spirit lives on, particularly in this LAT feature:

Following up his memorable turn in the Super Bowl's multimillion dollar crossover ad "Jackie Moon Enjoys A Frosty, Colon-Clearing Bud Light," Will Ferrell has taken the campaign for Semi-Pro to the pages of Sports Illustrated's Swimsuit Issue, confident that he can raise awareness of his latest arrogant-dumb-guy sports comedy by fondling a scantily clad Heidi Klum while wearing a variety of amusing 70s-era costumes.

We can barely keep up with the Barron Hilton DUI news! TMZ reports he had a blood alcohol level of .14, and that his father released this statement: "I haven't been contacted yet by either my son or the police. If what I have heard is true, it is very disturbing and I will have a lot to say- but it will be to my son not the media." The wealthy private school world, meanwhile, is abuzz, with Eastland Academy student Tootie Ramsey noting, "There's gonna be troubllllllle..." to which classmate Natalie Green added, "Make that doublllllle!" Developing... [TMZ, TMZ]

Everybody's Suing Everybody Day continues! Accusing New Line of employing the kind of "Hollywood accounting" practices that could secret billions of dollars of Lord of the Rings revenues in suspicious budget lines like "Hair/Make-up Hobbitscaping Services," "Elijah Wood Eye-Desparkling Effects," and "Hide all profits here! Sssssh!," representatives from J.R.R. Tolkein's charitable trust and the author's heirs have filed suit against the studio, looking to be paid their claimed $150 million share of the LOTR bounty: "I think that it's going to be extremely interesting to see how New Line is going to explain to a jury that these films grossed $6 billion and yet by their calculations the creators' heirs are not going to get even a single penny." Given that New Line was rumored to have paid previous profit-seeker Peter Jackson a $40 million settlement to keep their two The Hobbit films on track, Tolkien's heirs can probably convince the company to comb through their allegedly cooked books to shake loose eight-figures' worth of make-nice money before things devolve into ugliness. [NY Times]

18-year-old Barron Hilton has yet to really capture the world's imagination the way his older sisters Paris and Nicky have, his wealthy parents perhaps waiting until he turns 21 before gifting him with his very own orange-faced pet flack to encourage such profile-building. And while some suspected the Hilton family's dominant Shameless Famewhoring Gene may have skipped him entirely, the young heir may just have that Hilton magic after all, having been picked up this morning in Malibu for a DUI:

What is it about dirty, malnutritioned, skinny-jeans-wearing rockers that turns good girls bad? The latest victim to fall prey to this time-honored tradition is none other than Miss Hermione Granger herself, Emma Watson. She was spotted leaving a party in London with Razorlight's Johnny Borrell, best known Stateside for his sordid, screaming-match-filled relationship with recent rehab enrollee Kirsten Dunst. But considering what happened to Kiki once she hooked up Borrell, we are cringing at the very thought of Emma Watson trading in her summa cum laude Hogwarts education for an unpaid and involuntary internship at the Cirque Lodge. So how do we solve a problem like Emma?

Today's LAT picks the strike-weary brains of four TV showrunners who are returning to work after three weeks of agonizing about the fates of their series, storylines they were forced to abandon, and early-draft scripts they may soon need to rush into production, hoping to illustrate the back-to-work chaos facing a town scrambling to pick up where it left off in early November. My Name is Earl's Greg Garcia, for example, is publicly promising that anyone who fritters away their precious time with unproductive chatter about which agency's picket line snacks were the most delicious (the debate, of course, begins and ends with CAA's baby-filled scones) risks an immediate shitcanning. ("[T]hat's all I've heard about for the last three months. And now it's over. I'm not going to sit and listen to them talk about it now. If you say the word 'strike' and you're not talking about bowling, you're fired.") Meanwhile, Lost's Damon Lindelof frets that his staff's been laid off for so long that they may have lost their already seemingly tenuous grasp on what the hell is going on with their magical, polar-bear-and-smoke-monster-infested island: