Last week's killing of 17 people in northern Mexico was one of "several" carried out by inmates temporarily freed from prison using weapons on loan from prison guards. But the war on drugs should be over any day now. [LAT]

Despite conventional wisdom about high crime rates in hot months, New Yorkers are as likely to be victims of crime in October and December as in June and July. The takeaway: You could be murdered in literally any month. [WSJ]

Gawker once called the novelist Tao Lin "maybe perhaps the single most irritating person we've ever had to deal with." Times change. Here is Tao Lin's account of being arrested for trespassing at the NYU bookstore last week.

A guy in a Harry Potter shirt stabbed someone in the eye with a pen at Comic Con last night over a seat at the Resident Evil: Afterlife panel. Now he'll never get to ask his incredibly pedantic question![CBR]

A woman in California tried to run a guy over, then fled. When police pulled her over, she threw her urostomy bag at them, splashing them with urine. The cops dropped their guns and started going: eewww! (Not really.) [AP]

It's finally happened: A guy wearing a Darth Vader costume robbed a bank in New York. A mask: cape, chest-piece, everything. What's most amazing is that this didn't happen at Comic-Con.

In your forthright Thursday media column: Martin Bashir heads to MSNBC, the WSJ says its reporter was wrongly arrested in Chicago, the NYT Co's second quarter earnings, and an angry rant from a retiring sportswriter.

Murders are supposed to take place on dark inner city streets, or out in the woods. They are not supposed to take place in Beverly Hills, or—heaven forbid—in a holy place. Yet this week, they are.

A 29-year-old Californian named Travis Kevie was recently arrested after he broke into a closed-down bar and reopened it using six-packs he bought at the store. The best part? The police found out after the local paper published a profile.

Byron Williams, the suspect in an Oakland police shootout that his mother says stemmed from a hatred of the government's "left-wing agenda," planned to attack a group known to few outside of Glenn Beck's viewership. TPM reports on the connection.

The aging bandit who dragged an oxygen tank to his Madison Avenue crime spree—then died in his shiny black Cadillac during a high-speed car chase with the cops—was a career criminal and jailhouse preacher.

A Florida man broke into a church to steal its donations. But the box was locked and since he didn't have a crowbar, he was forced to improvise: He used the crucifix. Does that mean God was on his side?

WSJ reporter Douglas Belkin was arrested while covering the Blagojevich trial today. Don't touch security!

Just when Al Gore's "crazed sex poodle" masseuse assault allegations were waning, the National Enquirer digs up two more masseuses who say Gore propositioned them. Or, more precisely, "pointed at his erect penis and ordered her, 'Take care of THIS.'"

Billionaire Bill Clinton pal and vindictive perv Jeffrey Epstein completes his Palm Beach house arrest today, meaning he's officially done with his arduous sentence for paying tons of underage girls for sex. He's respectable again now. [Daily Beast]

Mike Bloomberg: wealthy druggie racist hypocrite (more or less).

An Air France flight attendant has confessed to 27 counts of theft after she took cash and jewelry off of passengers while they slept in first and business class. And authorities think that she's responsible for even more mile-high robberies.

Defarra Gaymon was a 48 year-old married father of four and CEO of the Credit Union of Atlanta. Last Friday night, he was shot and killed by a Newark police officer shortly after leaving his 30th high school reunion. Why?

This is Levi Detweiler, a 17-year-old kid arrested following a police chase last week and charged with possession of alcohol and reckless endangerment. And "overdriving an animal." See, he's Amish, and he was driving a horse and buggy.

Bad: a 17-year-old mother was arrested on Friday after surveillance cameras caught her trying to smother her four-month-old to death to "make life easier." Worse: she admitted to attempting it three previous times. Worst: she's barely being charged. More inside.