Is it, like...a ghost? A creative take on a drop cloth? A Grimace™? What the hell is Jackie Kennedy wearing?

On Friday, threatened authorities once again came for Christ, this time arresting the man known as "Philly Jesus" for soliciting tips at Philadelphia's LOVE Park.

Three days before Halloween, a man in a Tigger costume was busted having "full-blown sex" with a naked woman on the baby-changing table of a public restroom. The witnesses were a mom and a toddler, who had the door slammed in their faces by the bouncy-flouncy fucking couple.

Halloween: It's tonight. Glad you're excited—it's gonna be great. Since we're all here and it's Friday, might you stop by Kinja and tell us (or better yet, show us!) what you're wearing for Halloween this year? It'll be fun.

"Unruly costumed performers become global menace" is the headline of a story in the "News" section of a major metropolitan newspaper today. The story concerns people who don plush, oversized cartoon character costumes as a profession.

Halloween. It’s a great night for children who love candy and a great night for timid adults who struggle to get laid without costumes. Here we are on a cool October night, everyone just dressing up and trying to get something sweet, you know?

Halloween descended on New York like Hallowe'en upon a city Thursday, which meant the goons and goblins over at the Today show were up at dawn, peeling off their flaky reptile hides and stretching the skin of real people over their spikey, misshapen bodies. On top of that: a Halloween costume, as is appropriate for the day.

Earlier today, electronic music duo the Knocks posted a picture of far more famous electronic duo Daft Punk playing beer pong at the office of their record label, Columbia. Daft Punk are also known as Guy-Manuel de Homem-Christo and Thomas Bangalter, and also robots since they are almost never photographed without their trademark helmets.

This is the kind of story a natural disaster makes you forget is important: a couple Saturdays ago, Katie Holmes and her daughter Suri had dinner at Mr. Chow next to a group of fellow diners dressed up as Katie and Suri Freedom Fighters for Halloween. Also present: a guy dressed as Tom Cruise's character from Top Gun.

Welcome to Thatz Not Okay, a regular column in which I school inquiring readers on what is and is not okay. Please send your questions to caity.weaver@gawker.com with the subject "Thatz Not Okay."

One of the most difficult things about Halloween is trying to pick a costume that is sexier than your mom's costume.

Halloween party season will soon be upon us, which means, more importantly, celebrity Halloween party season will soon be upon us. Now that you've negged your way to the top of the celebrity dog pile, you've probably got more invitations than can fit inside a regulation sized plastic jack-o-lantern candy carrier (so bring a pillowcase, Jesus, plan ahead). Use this guide to plan your party route.

Kim Kardashian is that girl who takes iPhone shots of herself wearing a push-up bra in the dressing room of a Victoria's Secret, then texts them to all her male friends and asks, "Do u like my eyeshadow in dis pic?" Here she is dressed as a sexy peanut on a leopard print background. Do u like her eyeshadow in dis pic?

As of today, we are less than three weeks away from that night when the wretched souls of the dead stalk the living, rattling their miserable chains and demanding restitution in the form of blood or miniaturized versions of popular candy bars. Time to start rolling out Halloween costumes.

Elementary schoolers at the Uruti School in New Zealand helped dozens of dead possums achieve the goals they never achieved in life last weekend, and now people are giving them grief for it.

North America's two largest movie theater chains, AMC and Regal Cinemas, released statements Friday afternoon updating their policies on acceptable theater attire.

Unused flea-market typewriter Zooey Deschanel is very easy to dress in clothes, because "everything is so darn cute on her."

As the Romney clan scrambles to clean up its social media presence, Buzzfeed reporter and Mormon whisperer McKay Coppins highlights the "Mormon mommy blog" of Mary Romney, daughter-in-law of Mitt and wife of Craig. Mary made her blog private when Coppins came asking questions, which is really too bad, because now we don't the context of this 2007 Halloween photo. Apparently Craig is "dressed as his dad," but what the hell is Mary?

Working on his Halloween costume last night, big gross dick Chris Brown reminded the world that he also possesses a big gross dick.

Between all the fun you had in your costumes this weekend and the big news about Kim Kardashian, it's easy to forget that today is actually Halloween. Let's celebrate the best way we know how: with a costume contest and a cash prize!