Poor Jesus Christ only gets half the presents! This spurs Stephen Colbert to launch his annual "War on War on Christmas," in which he goes after sparring atheist-vs-religious billboards outside the Lincoln Tunnel. Watch inside.

Jon Stewart tread on familiar ground tonight, lambasting Senator John McCain for continuing his backpedaling and doublespeak on "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." Curiously, though, it was Joe Lieberman who got a tip of the hat. Watch inside.

Inspired by a story about STD detection on your iPhone, last night on the Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert introduced the iThrone, a device that allows you to check out a new sexual partner before it's too late. It's genius.

It's no secret that Congress stalls its progress leading up to an election day. But what about the few post-election, lame duck weeks? Tonight, Jon Stewart considered that while sarcastically opining on ambitious Democrats and... (legislative) cockblock-obsessed Republicans. Watch inside.

Tonight, Jon Stewart opened with the second segment in as many days regarding WikiLeaks' latest data dump (watch the first here). During it, Stewart went after WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange and his exaggerated martyrdom complex, exclaiming, "Stop the drama!"

Tonight, Jon Stewart opened The Daily Show with a bit about the latest WikiLeaks dump. After his sarcastic comments about the gossip-heavy nature of the leak, Stewart questioned the United States' curious relationship with questionably loyal Saudi Arabia. Watch inside.

Role playing is full of adventure! And cops. She'll call the cops on you. Because it's a game! No it isn't. Confused? Nick Swardson's Pretend Time poses the question, when is real too real?

Last week, Glenn Beck creepily revealed that George Soros was some sort of "puppet master" that Beck believes is set on overthrowing the American government. Tonight, Jon Stewart mocked the charade, and then turned the table on Beck. Watch inside.

Last night, Jon Stewart begrudgingly covered four Palin-related stories: Bristol's shocking DWTS upset (here) and her pro-abstinence PSA with The Situation (here), Willow's homophobic Facebook rage (here), and the whole family's ridiculous new reality show (here). The video, inside.

Manbird, the most difficult and least popular language on Earth, has over 500 variations of one particularly offensive phrase. It takes a firm grasp of deep throat resonance to get all the nuances just right. Lesson number one inside.

On last night's Daily Show, Jon Stewart addressed the ethics violations being leveled at New York State Congressman Charlie Rangel. Using Rangel's ridiculous justifications as a jumping off point, Stewart ripped him and his lack of accountability to shreds.

Tonight, Jon Stewart spent a few minutes discussing, in detail, just how ridiculous and archaic—not to mention ever-evolving—John McCain's stance on "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" is, marking Stewart's harshest critique yet of McCain's increasingly indefensible views. Watch inside.

Have you ever had a nightmare about getting married? How about having sex with you mother? Why not both! Thanks to a zombie roommate and a seriously freaky puzzle box: welcome to Mark Lilly's worst nightmare come true.

Tonight, Martha Stewart visited Stephen Colbert for quite the entertaining segment. Stewart talked about having her DNA taken/preserved and killing drunk turkeys with her bare hands—among other things—and also made gross hors d'oeuvres with Colbert. Video highlights inside.

As you've undoubtedly heard by now, a "mystery missile" was launched off of California's coast on Sunday night. Or was it just an airplane? At any rate, tonight, Jon Stewart handily mocked the media for their exaggerated reactions. Video inside.

Tonight, Jon Stewart discussed President Obama's trip to India. During it, Stewart questioned Obama's motivation for the trip, before—regarding Obama's dancing—saying, "You campaign with rhythm, but you govern like an old white man at a wedding." Watch inside.

While the rest of you have your eyes glued to the premiere of Conan O'Brien's new small screen effort, Conan, we at Gawker.TV were monitoring all of the other late-night shows for O'Brien-related mentions. Inside, video of everything we found.

Tonight, Jon Stewart discussed the various criticisms of his Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear—from Keith Olbermann (here), to Rachel Maddow (here), to Bill Maher (here)—and then offered them a little piece of his mind. Watch inside.

Tonight, Jon Stewart discussed President Obama's decidedly boring post-midterm elections press conference, reminding us of the fact that the media cared about two things: 1) does Obama know how much he sucks, and 2) does he "get it?" Video inside.

Yesterday on The Daily Show, Jon Stewart opened with a final (we think) segment about this year's insane midterm elections, from Meg Whitman's embarrassing defeat, to Carl Paladino's even more embarrassing concession speech, to the media's hyperbolic coverage, and more.