Last time a cash-strapped college girl auctioned her virginity, bidding reached $3.8 million. This week, cyberchick "Unigirl" accepted a paltry $30,000 for hers. Welcome to ECON202: Comparative Studies in the Pricing of Hymen.

Reading Tad Friend's New Yorker piece about protesting Berkeley students on the plane yesterday, I got to wondering: Why do college kids staging demonstrations piss me off so much these days? Am I stodgy and old, or is Revolution dead?

The New York Times reports today on colleges that are trying to make themselves less worthless when it comes to returns on the investment of one's higher education. How're they doing?

Capitol Records sued Vimeo today over copyright infringement concerning lip dubs. It's symbolic of how the music industry doesn't understand/can't catch up to the internet. As if on cue, the internet brings you a spankin' new Jackson 5 lip dub.

The Facebook privacy snafu really is the gift that keeps on giving (if you're a gossip blog). Here are the elect to Yale's Skull & Bones secretest society partying on their private island (we think) near the Canadian border.

A precocious high school student: upset, and writing into the Times! On college tours of schools like Harvard and Dartmouth, she heard comparisons to Harry Potter's magical school, Hogwarts. And she didn't like it. And people don't like her. Muggles!

After getting into Tulane, NYU, USC, Michigan State, an Ivy, a safety school, and whatever liberal arts school you threatened your Republican parents with actually attending, there's only one you really need to worry about: Cannabis College. Bongs away.

Governor Haley Barbour hit the Mississippi politician superfecta: he's proposed something that is at once racist, sexist, classist, and bad for education.

Campus shrinks say a record number of college students are seeking treatment for mental health issues and that their problems are more severe than ever. Are the kids alright?

The Journal of Studies on Alcohol and Drugs—the most popular journal—found that the binge-drinking and unprotected sex habits of students at America's drunkest colleges has barely changed since the early 90s. So what's the problem, right? High-five. [JSAD]

Arguably the best thing about the Colbert Report is the regular "Better Know a District" segment where Stephen interviews various members of Congress. Tonight he interviewed the openly gay Jared Polis of Colorado's 2nd district and it was hilarious.

The best college in the country? That would be the U.S. Military Academy (otherwise known as West Point), believe it or not—at least according to Forbes, which just issued its list of "America's Best Colleges":

Drug addictions and rehab trips have - as much drugs themselves - been trendy forever. But what about weed addictions? The Times' Sunday Styles' 'bout to get all High Times on us and investigate. Bongs out, bowls packed? Blaze away!

Ah, Columbia J-School, the antiquated educational institution where the young and naive go to chase their crazy Woodward and Bernstein dreams. Sadly, the students there are an unsanitary horde of crumb-infested vagabonds, according to a school memo forwarded to us.

Last month James Franco was supposed to deliver UCLA's commencement address, but he screwed the grads by backing out so he could go to a party—we thought. Now we know the real reason he didn't deliver the address.

Salon's Cary Tennis is a clinically insane advice columnist. Lately he's been hearing from recent graduates whining about the job market (Remember the Harvard grad who couldn't hold a fast-food gig?) Today it's an ice cream-slingling J-school grad.

Remember last week when James Franco canceled his UCLA commencement address scheduled for this Friday so he could attend a kegger or something? Well, the school announced Franco's replacement today and it's, well, just plain awful.

Noted sleep-deprived grad student/part-time thespian James Franco was scheduled to deliver the commencement address at UCLA next Friday (What, was Skeet Ulrich not available?), but he backed out today at the last minute, and now the Bruin Nation is weeping!

Princeton was on lock down because somebody saw somebody walking around with a gun! But now the "all clear" has gone out. It was just drunk dumpster-diving townies threatening the Ivy Leaguers with a squirt gun, as usual:

So this Tom Tancredo speechwriter/director at Tancredo's PAC got in a bit of trouble (arrested) a couple years back for calling a black woman "nigger" and then karate chopping her. Obviously, this two-year-old incident was just a youthful indiscretion. But guess who doesn't get to go to UVA anymore!