You try to eat healthy whenever you can, you go the gym every chance you get, and yet you still feel like you're not doing enough to stay fit. Relax! You're fine! According to a new study published in the American Medical Journal—and despite the constant patter of dieting and exercise advice—"physical activity and healthy eating rates are down, while obesity is up." Consider this a fine excuse to skip the gym this evening, if you'd like one. [NYDN]

Good news, gambling addicts with houses in the Hamptons! The Shinnecock Indian Nation is one step closer towards gaining official recognition from the federal government, a designation that would permit the tribe to open a casino. In Southampton. And they've already reached out to Gov. David Paterson to get the ball rolling!

• Rumor has it Richard Branson may be interested in buying Playboy. [ChiTrib]
• Two Boston Globe unions have agreed to concessions with the NYT Co. [E&P]
• Why did the Times pick Mexican billionaire Carlos Slim to invest in the paper instead of David Geffen? It seems publisher Arthur Sulzberger Jr. was "worried about Geffen's ambition to take over the company." [AllThingsD]
• Mayor Bloomberg plans to introduce legislation in Albany to extend the city's popular—but broke—film/TV tax credit program. [THR]
• Tom McGeveran has been named interim editor of the New York Observer. He'll take over for Peter Kaplan, whose last day will be this Friday. [NYO]

Is there a plot to deny Michael Wolff airtime on CNBC? For the second time in the last month, a technical glitch ended up interrupting one of his appearances, although we can't imagine viewers minded the fact that his image disappeared behind a blue screen for a minute or so while he droned on about Jon & Kate Plus 8, a show he explains at the outset he's never even seen before. (That's his shoulder sticking out on the right side of the photo.) The video is here; skip ahead to the 2:45 mark to see Wolff's magical disappearing act in action. [CNBC, previously]

Some experts are predicting that end of the recession is now in sight and economic growth will rebound in the second half of 2009. Not Bloomberg columnist Matthew Lynn! He's looking at the very different data set: "The one lesson we can draw from the global credit crisis is that all the traditional ways of measuring the state of the economy are about as useful as a bottle of suntan lotion in a snowstorm. So here are two benchmarks we should all be monitoring more closely: extramarital affairs and the price of Latvian hookers. Both are telling us that there is still plenty of trouble ahead." Latvian hookers? We won't even begin to guess what sort of first-hand research was involved on Lynn's part, but we would recommend a thorough check of his expense report. [Bloomberg via Dealbreaker]

"The CEO of the nation's largest linen company went berserk and brutally beat his housemaid in his posh Upper East Side apartment—leaving her with swelling on the brain, officials said. George Bardwil, 57, who runs Bardwil Home, was charged with second degree assault in Sunday's savage attack that left the maid unconscious in a pool of blood." Bardwil, whose wife left him two weeks ago and is currently on medication, originally denied involvement in the assault; he now claims he hit her after he caught her stealing money, as if that's some sort of excuse. For the record, the blood spatter print tablecloth pictured above is not manufactured by Bardwil's company, as far as we can tell. [NYP]

Ron Perelman already has a hand in the restaurant business: He's an investor in Graydon Carter's Monkey Bar and he also happens to own the building that houses Carter's Waverly Inn. But he has a new venture in the works! He's reopening the Blue Parrot, the margarita bar/restaurant in East Hampton that's been closed since 2006. Ralph Lauren had originally planned to take over the space; when his plans fell through, Perelman swooped in. And he's assembled quite the team to give the venue another lease on life.

There's a silver lining for couples struggling to procreate: The fertility industry, which has been hit hard by the abysmal economy, is now offering discounts! Faced with rapidly diminishing numbers of people seeking in vitro treatments, doctors are slashing prices and doling out coupons for their services. A year or two ago, a typical treatment might run $15,000 or more; now you, too, can have a child for the low, low price of $6,600. They're practically giving these babies away!

• Real estate prices are plummeting and deep-pocketed buyers are hard to come by, but that hasn't changed things at 820 Fifth, the notoriously picky co-op where 89-year-old socialite Jayne Wrightsman reigns supreme. Jeff Blau, the 41-year-old president of The Related Companies, had been willing to pay a whopping $31 million for developer Ara Hovnanian's fourth-floor apartment. But Blau and his wife Lisa were told to get lost even before they had a chance to interview (and despite an intervention by the mayor). At least they're in good company: Ron Perelman, casino mogul Steve Wynn, and oil heir Fred Koch are all past rejectees. [NYO]
• Stuart Parr—furniture designer, scenester, and boyfriend of socialite Allison Sarofim—has sold his condo at 25 Fifth Avenue for $1.35 million. [Cityfile]
• Poker champion Vadim Trincher has picked up a three-bedroom, 3,073-square-foot condo on the 63rd floor of the Trump Tower for $5 million. [P6]
• Kirsten Dunst's LA home can be yours for $1.7 million. [Real Estalker]

Viacom chairman Sumner Redstone turns 86 today. WNBC's Sue Simmons is turning 66. Former Secretary of State Henry Kissinger is 86. ABC News anchor Cynthia McFadden is turning 53. Actor Paul Bettany is 38. TV Chef Jamie Oliver is 34. Fashion designer Behnaz Sarafpour turns 40. The rapper Jadakiss is turning 34. André Benjamin (otherwise known as André 3000) is 35. Actor Richard Schiff (The West Wing) is 54. Lou Gossett Jr. turns 73. And Todd Bridges, your second-favorite adopted child from the '80s sitcom Diff'rent Strokes, turns 44 today.

• Are Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick planning to leave the West Village behind? That's what Britain's Daily Mirror is reporting today, although the story seems to be based on the fact a moving truck happened to be parked outside the couple's townhouse yesterday (maybe Broderick was just rid of some old furniture?), so you may want to take the news with a grain of salt. [DM]
• Mariah Carey had some issues with her stylist in Cannes last week. But she walked away with "millions of free diamonds" when she stopped off in Turkey this past weekend, so hopefully that made up for the inconvenience. [P6]
• Kanye West says he doesn't read books or have any respect for books. But he's just written one that he'd really like you to buy and read. [Reuters]
• Mike Tyson's 4-year-old daughter, Exodus Tyson, died yesterday following her treadmill accident on Monday. [Us]

The city's plan to turn parts of Times and Herald Squares into "pedestrian zones" went into effect yesterday. How did it go? Traffic wasn't disrupted very much, although officials pointed out that there were fewer cars on the street yesterday after the holiday weekend. Some groups—like cabbies and tour bus operators—were pretty displeased, although that was to be expected. And the crummy lounge chairs that now dot the city's most famous thoroughfare didn't do much to impress tourists passing through Times Square. When a woman from Germany was asked whether she thought "the lounge chairs were a bit, well, cheap for a major public space in New York City," she acknowledged that real wooden chairs and benches would have probably been too expensive. "But we do have them in Germany," she added. So NYC isn't Frankfurt just yet. But just give it some time. [NYT, AMNY]

• Following a similar move by Morgan Stanley last week, Citigroup and Bank of America are raising base salaries for bankers. It's designed to make up for the new limits on annual bonuses (and won't make up for the difference, by any means), so don't expect shouts of joy at either bank today. [WSJ]
• Bank of America has scraped together another $5.9 billion, which means it's now 76 percent of the way toward filling its $33.9 billion capital hole. [WSJ]
• New York State Controller Thomas DiNapoli is cutting ties with 10 hedge fund managers as part of the state's pension corruption investigation. [DB]

Rep. Anthony Weiner is officially dropping out of the race for mayor, a move he hinted at a couple of months ago when he announced plans to suspend his campaign. The move leaves Comptroller William Thompson in the unenviable position of having to go head to head with Michael Bloomberg (and his $80 million war chest) this fall. It also means the election will likely turn out to be a lot less entertaining. "Mr. Weiner is among the few political figures in the city who seem to rattle the supremely confident Mr. Bloomberg, and appears almost to relish antagonizing the mayor. His exit, in some ways, is a victory for Bloomberg campaign aides, who sought to knock him out of the race." [City Hall News, NYT]

• Mayor Bloomberg has declared Thursday to be "Burberry Day" in honor of the lighting of the Burberry logo atop the company's new HQ at 444 Madison Avenue. [FWD]
• It looks like the Gianni Versace CEO Giancarlo Di Risio will be departing the company after going head to head with Donatella Versace. [WSJ]
• Italian officials have accused Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana of tax evasion, and have threatened the duo with a $1+ billion fine. [Cut]
• You may want to think twice before you try and squeeze into a pair of skinny jeans. They've been known to cause a nerve condition called "meralgia paresthetica," otherwise known as "tingling thigh syndrome." [MSNBC]

"In doorman buildings, average apartment rents are down 6.9% over the last year. For non-doorman buildings the drop was 3.6%. The largest rent reductions took place in Midtown East, where rents for two-bedroom units in doorman buildings plummeted 21.3% from the same month a year ago, and in Murray Hill, where non-doorman one-bedroom units fell 20.7%." [Crain's]

• David Bouley has shuttered Secession, which he opened last fall (and which he'd hoped to save by hiring Christian Delouvrier as chef recently). In its place, he's planning to open a Japanese restaurant called Brushstroke. [NYT]
• Manhattan's Water Taxi Beach debuted this weekend. [GS]
• Noah Tepperberg's new "gastropub/ultralounge," Avenue, will open on June 1 with a party for Mandy Moore. In the meantime, Marc Jacobs held a 30th birthday party there recently for fiancé Lorenzo Martone. [NYM]
• Ruth Madoff is a fan of the steak at Donohue's on Lexington, it seems. [P6]
• The new Baja Fresh opened in Midtown today. [ML]

Moving to Chicago? Got about $10.5 million to spend on a new house? You're in luck! JPMorgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon's Gold Coast home—with 26 rooms and 15,700 square feet of space—is now for sale. Dimon hasn't actually lived there since he left Bank One to join JPMorgan Chase in 2004. But clearly he's timed the sale perfectly. [Blockshopper via Dealbreaker]

Given Social Life is "one of the most popular magazines in Manhattan and the Hamptons" and only covers "the hottest celebrity parties," it's a bit of a mystery why the mag's season opener at the "Social Life estate"—hosted by botorious editor-in-chief Devorah Rose—didn't attract any actual celebrities. Fortunately, "Real Housewife" Alex McCord and her hotel manager husband, Simon van Kempen, didn't have anything else to do and kindly turned up to add a little C-list glam, so the event wasn't a complete disaster. Devorah's big get after the jump.

It's been more than six months since Giuseppe Cipriani has stepped foot in the United States, either because he's "exploring new business ventures" in places like Turkey and Dubai, or because he's convinced he faces serious legal trouble if he returns to NYC, depending on which side of the story you choose to believe. But his fading collection of eateries hasn't been neglected, you'll be pleased to hear. Sons Maggio and Ignazio have stepped in to fill Giuseppe's shiny Gucci loafers!