How does "maverick" everyman John McCain stack up to "elitist" Barack Obama? Why, this handy charticle illustrating their assets in a side-by-side comparison speaks for itself. Spin this, you filthy rich basket case. Click through for bigger pic. [ProseBeforeHose]

Now that I've started getting Mad Men on Netflix, I plan to catch up with every other ad critic in the past year by cleverly inserting a reference to the show into each advertising-related item that I write. In this way we seduce you with a connection to a piece of pop culture detritus you enjoy, then use that as a catapult into our sales pitch, represented in this case by a plea for you to read the rest of this post, with the implied promise that it will be worth your while. So, remember that Mad Men episode where they're all marveling at the Volkswagen "Lemon" ad? That particular ad was a breakthrough just because of its honest, direct style. It was the opposite of Lucky Strikes' "It's Toasted" campaign—an equivalent would have been something like "Lucky Strikes—you'll die but you like them anyways." VW continued on a streak of spot-on advertising that spanned at least the next two decades. Look at this classic VW TV spot and ask yourself, has advertising advanced past this yet, idea-wise?

There's no question the auto industry-particularly the US auto industry-is currently in the toilet. There's also no question that bad times for the auto industry lead to cuts in car companies' advertising budgets, which hurts the print and broadcast media outlets that reap billions from automakers every year. That's not news to anybody. What is news is the revelation that prospects for the print media have grown so dim that they are now celebrating the fact of declining auto ads, as proof that they're at the mercy of temporary business cycles beyond their control. Wow, that's sad: Newspapers nationwide lost more than $130 million last year in auto ad sales. Car ads have gone from 10% of national newspaper ads, to less that 3% in just three years. That's terrible by any standards. Magazines are experiencing a similar decline. So how to put this disaster in a good light?

Max Mosley, the British auto racing boss who found himself in a scandal over his Nazi-or-maybe-prison-themed sex orgy video and embarrassed the world's luxury auto makers, has won his privacy lawsuit against the UK paper that published the photos, thereby killing the UK's gossip industry. Slate will find a way to make the whole thing boring. Jalopnik has the tape. Here's how Mosley won:

Showing off electric carmaker Tesla's first Northern California dealership, general manager Tom O'Leary pointed past the $109,000 Roadsters littered about the showroom and out the front windows to a Coastal Gasoline station across the way. The station's sign read: $4.49 for a gallon of unleaded, $5.15 for diesel. "People ask me about signage," O'Leary told the San JoseMercury News. "I'm thinking of putting a sign here that says, 'How's that working out for you?'" So far, some 1,100 deposit-paying buyers have already answered O'Leary's question with a resounding: "Not well. Now take my money." Alas for those lovers of Earth and speed — it's going to be a while before they get their autos. Tesla plans to build only four Roadsters per week for the next two months. Until production ramps up, buyers will have to sate themselves with images of shiny Roadsters — like the ones from the dealership's opening, below, courtesy of Brian Solis.

The government of France has officially forfeited all the liberal cred it's earned over the past 500 years: yesterday, French prosecutors raided the office of an auto magazine, confiscated its computers and files, and arrested a reporter for the crime of publishing a scoop. A scoop about autos, the subject of the magazine! Because in France, freedom of the press must take a back seat to the concerns of the almighty Renault corporation.

Black women these days: they're just not buying enough Toyota Camrys. The car company's ad agency rep explains the problem: "[Black women] think of it as suburban, not urban; as solid but boring. And for this woman, she doesn't see herself as boring." Ha, you go girl! Well, ladies, Toyota likes to think of all of its customers as "sisters." And it knows just how to get you elusive African-American females to buy more of their boring suburban cars—with a crazy online fashion espionage game! Coincidentally, there's a black woman in it. And a Camry!

Conscious intellectual hip hop star Common has announced the winner of his big "Lincoln Spotlight" lyricist competition with Lincoln—the car manufacturer that represents hip hop culture. The winner wrote a song based on "Lincoln's brand truths: advancing the American dream, exploring what it means to reach higher, daring to do more and taking pride in one's history." That is so exactly Lincoln. And hey, just last week Common landed a role in the next Terminator movie! My irrational haterade judgment of him as a tool continues to be confirmed and re-confirmed. For those of you curious about what it takes to succeed in hip hop in 2008, the lyrics of the winning Lincoln Spotlight entry are after the jump. Feel the brand truths:

Stanley Fish—public intellectual, Times blogger, and man of secret ethics—has been doing a lot of thinking about rental car ads, and their relation to cheating on your wife and/ or gay lover. "The genius of the commercials is that they foreground the sexuality that informs the relationship between the car owner and the object of his/her affection," Fish wrote. That's what I'm saying! Because many rental car ads play on the theme of leaving your old car for a new one, Fish believes they are deserving of deep deconstruction. About his favorite Avis ad, he concludes "Lust is lust and betrayal is betrayal, whether the relationship is gay or straight." Others might just like the part with the car, and the guy, and the joke. The ad, and his deep, sexy analysis of its genre, below.

Larry Winget: bald person, financial guru, Hyundai pitchman. He's one of several financial authors who appear incongruously in Hyundai's current ad campaign, which features some "normal" people who, upon seeing an anonymous man in a tie pop up behind them at a car dealership and offer advice, react by saying excitedly, "Hey! Aren't you [financial author] of [personal finance advice book]?!" Whereas a real person would probably kick them in the nuts. The funny thing is that bald financial guru and Hyundai pitchman Larry Winget now says he doesn't necessarily want people to buy Hyundais at all!

This is an admittedly very cool new ad for Audi, in which a whole bunch of "powerful Hungarian gymnasts" run through an impeccably choreographed routine of flips and, uh, other gymnastic moves that are meant to symbolize the inner workings of the Audi RS6's engine. The car costs over $150,000, so it better have some damn fine inner workings [Guardian UK]. Our only issue with the ad is that they could have gotten the break dance crew in Washington Square Park to do this entire routine for about $87, so if they paid the Hungarians more than that, they just got ripped off. Click to watch the automotive performance art.

If you've been following the real news, you'll recall that Max Mosley is the British Formula 1 racing president who is currently involved in a slight tiff over a video of him having an hours-long Nazi-themed orgy with five hookers. A bit embarrassing for him personally, yes. It's also caused some grumbling among the Formula 1 teams. And now, this sex scandal is reaching its absurd logical conclusion, as its ripples extend into the highest reaches of the world's corporations: BMW and Mercedes-Benz have jointly condemned Mosley's sexual taste as "disgraceful." [BBC]. Because they are the arbiters of morality in sexuality! They're also a bit sensitive about the whole Nazi angle, because, you know, they're from Germany themselves.

People don't buy cars to get them from point A to point B. People buy cars for a feeling, dammit! And this car ad inspires some serious feelings: existential torment, lost love, special moments, sheer beauty. It's one of most visually evocative ads we've seen in a long time; a powerful composition. But then you see it's for Ford Fusion, and you're like, "WTF? Isn't that car a piece of crap?" Then you see the tagline at the end and you're like, "Ha, I don't think so." Then you're like, "SO WHAT DID HE SAY TO THE GIRL, YOU BASTARDS?" So, yes, very evocative. The full ad [via Adrants] after the jump.

Insane fundamentalist Christian group American Family Association has declared victory in a two-year boycott against Ford Motor Company and its "significant support of the homosexual agenda." This, despite the fact that Ford says it negotiated no settlement, and is still involved with groups that work in support of gay marriage [Mixed Media]. It's the "Declare victory and go home" strategy, apparently. The AFA is very opposed to any ads "aimed at the homosexual community specifically." Except maybe ads for [jokey regular product with a gay reputation—suggestions?]! But the truth is that auto ads targeting gays have been standard for quite a while now, in America and internationally. After the jump, some of the most obvious examples.

"My brother did 3 tours in Iraq so someone could drive around in this!?!?!!?" That's what Rebecca from Minneapolis wants to know about this stupid Hummer. So she flipped the bastard off! Luckily for her, there's a website called FUH2.com, devoted exclusively to pictures of people flipping off Hummers (H2 version only). We judge this to be a good thing. After the jump, five pictures illustrating the different styles that patriotic Americans have used to give the gas-guzzling monsters the one-finger salute. May this be the first step towards justice in the world!

Important news for the carless! Car-sharing companies Zipcar and Flexcar announced their merger today, which doesn't actually mean much for New York Zipcar members unless they'd like to rent in one of the cities currently only served by Flexcar (like Philly, if you have some ugly friends to visit). Zipcar is totally awesome for things like impulse trips to the nearest Sonic or Dairy Queen, so we recommend it highly. [Zipcar]

Tesla Motors, the Silicon Valley maker of superfast electric sports cars, has fallen behind schedule delivering its first 100 cars to the Googlionaires, George Clooney and other buyers who ponied up $100,000 apiece. Today's New York Times report by John Markoff blames battery troubles, but Tesla's blog says no, it's problems with the cars' transmissions. I feel so much better now.

In a blatant bid for "most-emailed" status, the Times has published an article about whether some cars are more homosexual than others. Well, it's a step up from all those "College: Will Your Child Get In, Or Did You Fuck Up Your Life And Hers?" articles! Anyway, "Gay By Design, or a Lifestyle Choice" left some questions unanswered. So we asked them of a Gay.

No comment needed.

So that you wouldn't have to, Wired.com's Lore Sj berg sampled this summer's crop of breakfast cereal movie tie-ins, those boxed, promotional confections aimed at ensuring that the public is either breathing, eating, or excreting the studio's summer blockbusters at all times. Some of his findings: