"Everything about Debrahlee Lorenzana is hot. Even her name sizzles," writes the Voice in a profile of the hot banker fired for being "too distracting for her male colleagues to bear." Her lawyer even has photographic evidence of said hotness.

The President will speak at Cooper Union today, where he plans to chastise Wall Street while spelling out the details of his proposed financial regulation bill. Fearful of looking worse than they already do, some Republicans are signing on. [NYT]

JP Morgan's mortgage chief David Lowman yesterday told Rep. Barney Frank that he wanted people who were concerned about home foreclosures to "come to me." He had no idea he would be chased off Capitol Hill by an angry mob.

Maybe you can somehow forgive bankers for destroying our economy. But the lyrics of this rap, performed at a 2006 Washington Mutual "President's Club Dinner" in Hawaii, are unforgivable. They were revealed at a very awkward Senate hearing today.

The investment bank's CEO Lloyd Blankfein said in an annual report that while Goldman "held various positions in residential mortgage-related products in 2007, our short positions were not a ‘bet against' our clients." They just bet against everyone else. [BusinessWeek]

Rejoice, Americans in favor of education: business school grads are having an easier time finding investment banking jobs now. USA education reform= done! The other half of this plan is that regular (non-business) school kids now have 20% less school.

In the interest of balance, here's a quote from a New York Times article today that explains why the recession in New York will probably be a lot less severe than predicted, and the recovery quicker.

At an appearance in North Carolina, John Mack added that he still doesn't "think the industry gets it," according to Bloomberg News. And that ridiculous pay would continue as banks are scared of losing staff.

Greenwich, Conn., jewelry store owner, on a client who bought his wife a Mercedes S550 sedan (starting price: $91,600) this year instead of her usual Rolls-Royce, in a wonderful McClatchy story about bonus season in the banker enclave.

Oswald Gruebel (villainous name), Josef Ackermann (also scary) and... Brian Moynihan (Queens cop), the heads of UBS, Deutsche Bank and Bank of America had a shadowy meeting at the world economic forum. They discussed how to "reassert their influence with regulators and governments." Also known as taking over the world. [Bloomberg]

The Wall Street Journal digs under the surface of banks' fake contrition and finds loans that are deferred against share compensation or are 'forgivable' — which means they don't really have to be paid back.

According to estimates and figures the Wall Street Journal has dug up, anyway. They quote a man defending the payouts and using the textbook banker bonus defence.

There have been many not-very-nice bankers before. There have been many not-very-nice husbands too. But this man, Jason Meyers, is clearly gifted in both departments. His wife is suing him, and the details are gruesome.

The Way We Live Now: In prison. Although if we can hold on for a few more years of economic doom, the jail might crumble, from neglect! In the meantime: We stand in solidarity with our oppressed brethren, bankers.

Thriller: 15,000 Bernie Madoff masks have gone out for sale this Halloween.

The NYT Business section did a nice little Where Are They Now on some fallen banker komrades from Lehman Brothers. Are they destitute? Are they happier? Are they better than they were before? And: should we feel bad for them?

The Sunday Styles finally went to Fashion Meets Finance, an event where Manhattan banker-types and fashion slaves meet, consummate, and procreate certain genetics to create lineages of people you'd rather not know. Their findings are, while nothing new, nonetheless awesome.

Robin Katz, the 25-year-old Chase financial planner and Smith College grad accused of relieving one of her clients of $110,000, has redeeming qualities: The guy she ripped off is a poker-playing Wall Street broker. Also she drinks a lot.

The St. Regis Monarch Beach, the rich-people hotel that AIG executives partied at after getting all their bailout money, couldn't pay its bills and so now a bailed-out Citigroup owns it. And it's losing money. Your money.

Robin Katz is a "sexy 25-year-old financial planner working at Chase's Midtown headquarters," according to the New York Post, who allegedly ripped off a client to the tune of $110,000 so she could spend it "shopping" and "going out."