A couple in Hallett Cove, South Australia filmed themselves killing a wolf spider with a broom recently. Did they film themselves because they knew it would explode with hundreds of baby spiders, making for a brutal and terrifying video? Almost certainly. Should you watch it? Almost certainly you should not. And yet.

Surfing father Jorge Tirado took his 9-month-old son out for his first little surf recently, filming the adventure for posterity and, more importantly, the internet. Hmm. Should you take your infant surfing?

We've all been there. Where is there? The donut shop. What are we doing? Trying to find a good donut to munch. But, oh no—what if your shop is all out of Boston Cremes (the unanimous best donut of all the varieties)? You can be like this mom and forget your baby at the store to go find the right one.

A 7-month-old baby girl was found dead Monday morning in Chicago's Little Village neighborhood after her throat was apparently cut with a circular power saw, Chicago's ABC7 reports.

According to prolific Instagram troll 50 Cent, his 2-year-old son Sire recently landed a $700,000 modeling deal, a dollar amount roughly equivalent to 1.4 million his dads.

With songs like "Back to the Crib" and "Wet the Bed," Chris Brown has long alluded to his desire to become a parent, but a new report from TMZ says the singer got his wish a full nine months ago, siring a beautiful baby girl.

Mama, please. Hear my pleas. Feed your babies peanuts.

A troubling bit of phone footage showing a man interrupting a couple while they fucked against a subway escalator has gone viral after someone uploaded it to LiveLeak. It would be one thing to disturb two adults in the midst of mad, passionate rutting, but the shocking reveal comes when the woman stands up, pants around her ankles, and we see ... a baby.

Whoa there: After 18 hours of labor, a Florida woman reeled in this 14.1-pound whopper last week, one of the state's largest on record. Whatta catch!

Twitter personality Michael Wolff's girlfriend Victoria Floethe, a person from 2009, is pregnant, Page Six reports. Wolfe is 61; Floethe is 34. Congratulations to them both! Babies are wonderful.

The most badass woman in Utah basically delivered her own baby when her water broke as she was driving herself to the hospital.

From a great (best ever?) YouTube compilation, babies in their finest state: abject terror.

A Turkish official who was carried across a snowy patch in the Aegean province because he was not wearing sensible footwear has been suspended, the BBC reports, for his inability to comply with the "municipality's attitude of service, citizen relations and values." He had some local farmers carry him as to not get his feetsies wet.

The Hills' plastic surgery experiment Heidi Montag, who has otherwise been minding her own business lately, posted a photo of Clearblue's Advanced Digital Ovulation Test (#1 OB-GYN recommended brand) to Instagram yesterday. Does this mean that she and Spencer Pratt are trying to become parents?

Eight-and-a-half month old baby Wyatt (not this one) is in the zone. He's playing along with a Pantera song his mommy and his daddy put on in order to record a video for the Internet and he doesn't give one heck about anything that anybody thinks about it, or about the impossibilities re: a baby drumming. He's in the zone, man, and all he can do is smile. And drum.

Luke Harris, 50, and Daryl Lee, 41, a couple from Surrey, England, eager to get their family started, are going all-out on parenthood: They're expecting three kids via three surrogates between January and July of next year.

Baby lift up baby body. Baby lurch forward. Baby's baby arms collapse under weight of baby body. Baby lift up baby body. Baby lurch forward. Baby's baby arms collapse under weight of baby body. Tired of waiting for Baby, Puppy meet baby halfway. Puppy kiss. :)

It's hard to imagine a more annoying celebrity dad than Ashton Kutcher, but good news: God has blessed Justin Timberlake and his wife (who?) with a beautiful fetus. US Weekly reports that Timberlake is expecting his first child with Jessica Biel.

Ellen continued its week of showcasing cute kids from the Internet who are known for saying a word yesterday with the adorable, bow-tied "exasperating" kid. (He's still not terribly on board with the idea of having a new brother or sister, if you're wondering.)

Authorities are calling downtown LA the new Miami—as far as drug money laundering schemes go.