There's a precious moment in James Brady's most recent media column for Forbes. Jim hits up Hearst prez Cathie Black's holiday party and rubs elbows with the twiterati, running into a few old friends in the process.
As the year draws to a close, media organizations are busy putting together collections of lists and handing out gimmicky awards in an attempt to grab traffic and attention. (Yes, of course, we're working on ours.) A case in point is I Want Media's 2006 Media Person of the Year Poll, a venerable tradition going back all the way to 2002, when Martha Stewart took the title. So it's only natural that Rachael Ray, "the new Martha," (and conclusive evidence that we as a society are getting collectively stupider at an alarming rate) be included. Let's take a look at her qualifications.
Worried that you haven't seen former Seventeen editor Atoosa Rubenstein's name in the news in about five days or so? Fear not! The 'Toos has hired acclaimed PR firm Rubenstein Public Relations. WWD, which reports the story, snidely suggests that the 'Toos is in good company (the firm is "known for its crisis management expertise (as in the current Michael Richards brouhaha)"), but we're going to be a bit more charitable: the 'Toos has "lots going on" what with her early exit at Hearst. And who better to help her out than the other Rubenstein, described by one wag as
We're not sure when Atoosa Rubenstein became a figure of such renown that she merits a parody on Saturday Night Live, but this Maya Rudolph impersonation from Saturday's episode is probably the funniest thing that show has done in a decade. (And we know how desperate they are.) Extra points to the makeup people for not slapping on an oversized putty nose or arm hair. One quibble: no fried shrimp present.
There's an article behind the pay wall in today's Wall Street Journal about "destination elevators," buttonless cars programmed to arrive at specific floors. They're initially difficult to adjust to, causing confusion among the elderly (Rupert Murdoch) and the young alike. But,
Departing Seventeen editor Atoosa Rubenstein gives a quickie interview to AdAge wherein she discusses her reasons for exiting:
So who's gonna replace the 'Toos at Seventeen? One interesting name we're hearing from more than our usual single source is Amy Goldwasser, late of New York magazine, where she helped create "The Strategist," a sin which will no doubt haunt her for the rest of the days. Goldwasser would be an interesting choice, in that she's the anti-'Toos: Note her recent sale of a book collecting the essays of teenage American girls. ("My goal is to edit them like they're adult writers.") Adding credence to the rumor is word that Goldwasser, a freelance editor at Vogue is only committed to that title till year's end. Speculation here.
Memories:
Gawker can EXCLUSIVELY report that, as of this morning, Atoosa Rubenstein's myspace page still lists her as the EIC of Seventeen, making no mention of the fact that she's leaving the book. The Post EXCLUSIVELY reports that the 'Toos plans "to launch her own teen-centered Web business, write a book and start a consulting firm specializing in the youth market," while Jossip EXCLUSIVELY reveals that "Atoosa's contract expired in August... and she's been a free agent ever since. And that hasn't sat well with Cathie Black, whose Hearst house has been left in disarray ever since the 'Toos announced her impending exit."
Now this is just mean. We would never compare Seventeen EIC Atoosa Rubenstein to the character Jigsaw from the popular splatter-film Saw series, but they have no such compunction over at fourfour. It must be lonely to be an anonymous, bitter person who comes out from under a rock every so often to throw rocks at people who are legitimately out there, working hard and getting results.
Perhaps not unfairly, Gawker has developed something of a reputation for meanness, for going above and beyond the bounds of decency in our never-ending attempt to puncture the egos of our celebrity targets. Despite what you might think, this upsets us, and sometimes when we're crying ourselves to sleep we have a brief moment where we feel actual guilt about the unnecessary cruelty we inflict. This weekend we found ourselves particularly upset about the mean e-mail concerning Atoosa Rubenstein's arm hair. The 'Toos herself, ever the healer, was also upset:
From our venerable mailbag, a late-breaking development in the whirlwind career of Seventeen editor and self-promoting working girl Atoosa Rubenstein:
From yesterday's Page Six, an update on self-promoting Seventeen EIC Atoosa Rubenstein:
• Us Weekly "breaks the news" that Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston have split, noting that the relationship soured shortly after the late-June engagement. The same engagement that Us announced and Aniston denied, coincidentally. But who cares? Now there's meaty quotes from "insiders" and "close friends," and you can't argue with that sort of evidence. [Us Weekly]
• Paris and some other skank claw each other's eyes out. For the record, we fully support the yanking of weaves. [TMZ]
• If Kevin Federline and Britney Spears get divorced, he'll get $10 million. So unless Brit's 4-weeks pregnant again, expect K-Fed to be fucking Vegas hookers every weekend. It's win-win. How is that God so brightly smiled upon this guy? [Page Six]
• ABC shelled out six-figures in "licensing fees" to Crocodile Widow Teri Irwin, just so Barbara Walters could fly to Australia and piss off the locals. [R&M]
• Now that Jacob the Jeweler is facing charges of money-laundering, very few of his hip-hop clients are coming forward to support him. Wonder why. [Lowdown]
• Former Miss Seventeen contestant Brianna Burrows scored an internship with the magazine but left the gig "traumatized." She also claims EIC Atoosa Rubenstein threatened her, and 21-year-old Burrows is now prepping a legal team — just the kind of youth empowerment we like to hear about. [Page Six]
Today's Page Six reports — almost a month after the fact — that Seventeen editor Atoosa Rubenstein's legions are abandoning Big Momma because of her "impossible" demands and the "backbreaking" workload. Why are things so tough around the office? Because Atoosa, you see, is a star. Her dreams of fame and televised glory come first, and every last staffer will work without food or water until the 'Toos meets her goal.
