Kids looking forward to the annual Easter egg hunt in Old Colorado City will be disappointed this year: the popular event has been canceled. Sure, they can still celebrate the Jesus aspects of the holiday, but gone is the thrill of searching for colored eggs to earn prizes and candy. And it's not even the children's fault.

Director and science nerd James Cameron is making an attempt to travel to the Mariana Trench, the deepest part of the ocean. The last time someone tried this was in 1960, when Swiss oceanographer Jacques Piccard and Navy Lt. Don Walsh spent a weak 20 minutes at the bottom. Cameron plans on filming and exploring for six hours down in the trench, which is a staggering seven miles below sea level.

Charla Nash, the woman whose face and hands were ripped off by a friend's pet chimpanzee, is trying to sue the state of Connecticut. She claims that Governor Dannel P. Malloy — who was mayor of Stamford when the chimp first escaped in 2003 — knew about the danger and didn't do anything to prevent the attack.

To many following the Trayvon Martin case, racial bias seems clear. But in order to charge George Zimmerman with a hate crime, prosecutors would have to prove that the shooting was racially motivated. The best piece of evidence so far is Zimmerman's 911 call, during which he may or may not have said "fucking coons."

The United States handed over a total of $860,000 to the families of those killed or injured in Sgt. Robert Bales' shooting rampage: $50,000 for each person killed, and $10,000 for each person wounded. Col. Gary Kolb, spokesperson for NATO's International Security Force, said the money was to help the victims and their families, and not compensation for Bales' actions.

News broke last night that Dick Cheney received a heart transplant after 20 months on the cardiac transplant list. Cheney's old heart had been damaged by the five heart attacks he's had since age 37.

Evidently unaware that you can get The New York Times on the street, an "emotionally disturbed" man attempted to climb up the side of the New York Times headquarters because he wanted a copy of the paper.

It's been a while since we heard from the "Obama's a secret Muslim" lunatic fringe, but they still pop up from time to time. Like at today's Louisiana rally for Newt Gingrich, at which a man named Bob Nolan offered this stunning assessment of the president.

Once the news broke, many were outraged by Penn State's failure to act on allegations that Jerry Sandusky was sexually abusing children. The latest piece of information is even more damning — a 1998 police report that includes testimony from a psychologist who concluded Sandusky "fit the profile of a likely pedophile."

That movie no one will shut up about is setting new records already — The Hunger Games' $68.3 million opening gives it the biggest opening day of any non-sequel, and the fifth-biggest opening of all time. Midnight showings accounted for $19.7 million of the film's take, which gives you a sense of how devoted fans of this series are.

The internet was abuzz with outrage yesterday after comments national joke Geraldo Rivera made on Fox & Friends. In response to the murder of Trayvon Martin, he reflected, "I think the hoodie is as much responsible for Trayvon Martin's death as George Zimmerman was." The angry response he unleashed was warranted, but it's worth taking a look at what Geraldo was trying to say — and why he's full of shit.

It's been a bad week for Mitt Romney and a good week for Ohio Art: the latter produces the popular toy Etch A Sketch, which got a helping hand from the Romney campaign. On Wednesday, Romney strategist Eric Fehmstrom made an unfortunate analogy when asked about his candidate's ever-changing policy positions.

Turns out Arlen Specter, the Pennsylvania senator who jumped the aisle to become a Democrat in 2009, is a sensual man. "Arlen Specter's Memoir: The Five Steamiest Passages" is the headline of an Amanda Terkel Huffington Post article that really delivers. Excerpts:

German publication B.Z. has shed some light on the apocalyptic coming together of the Manilow*, Manson, Del Rey trio, pictured together at the Echo Music Awards in Germany: Marilyn Manson and Lana Del Rey are dating. B.Z. is supposedly in possession of photographic evidence that the once-rumored Wonder Years star and forever-rumored self-fellating rocker is having hotel sleepovers with Lana Del Rey.

Whitney Houston drowned, with cocaine fresh in her system, following a possible heart attack, according to her newly-released initial autopsy report.

What is it about Wall Street Journal editors that makes tech executives give horrible, self-destructive quotes? They got Google's CEO to say children will someday change their names to escape their Google hits. And now they apparently got the inventor of the Segway to say many women and minorities are more interested in "bouncing balls" than studying computer science.

Earlier this month, Upper East Side mom Anna Gristina was arrested and charged with running a high end brothel catering to "powerful men." So who were those powerful men? The first big name has leaked, and it is... utterly unsurprising.

Kraft Foods Inc. announced today that it plans to change its corporate name to Mondelēz International, Inc.

The residents of a small Wisconsin town have had their lives plagued by house-rattling underground booms for the past few nights. No one has yet been able to identify the source of the sounds.

Last Saturday, a few hundred protesters staged a demonstration in lower Manhattan's Zuccotti Park to celebrate the six-month anniversary of Occupy Wall Street. It was almost like old times: chants, arrests, a notable instance of police brutality against a young woman, and New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg scoffing at the whole thing the day after. Occupy's back! But the next few weeks will be crucial to see if it's still got it.