Elizabeth Edwards has been demanding that her interviewers not utter the name of that woman—Rielle Hunter—as a condition for granting interviews. And CNN, Oprah, and NBC News have all caved.

American Poultry Queen Oprah Winfrey gave the commencement address to the starry-eyed, chickenless graduates of Duke University yesterday. Her message to them: I really love my private jet!

Kiefer Sutherland was in a New York police precinct house for two hours, being charged with assault for headbutting someone at a Met Costume gala after-party. But he has yet to answer to Anna Wintour.

Joe the Plumber divorced the GOP this week, because he is in love with unwarranted attention. We should send him to Israel permanently, he could take down Likud in a month. [HuffPo]

Leave it to the tabloid sensationalists at the New York Times Co. and in the Boston Globe newsroom to make labor negotiations exciting. Their complex labor deal to save the paper is TOP SECRET.

Who is banned from entering the UK for reasons of extremism? Fred Phelps, KKK grand wizard Stephen Donald Black, neo-Nazi Erich Gliebe—and talk show host Michael Savage!

The New York Times Co. Sunday night said it would shut down the Boston Globe if its cost-cutting demands weren't met. As it's been saying for a month. The deadline came and went. And?

John Edwards' philandering has gone federal. It might soon hit the courts. And to think just last summer the scandal was penny ante: stuck in the tabloid swamps, save for a disappointing ABC finale.

The New York Times and Wall Street Journal are now in a full-blown pissing match over circulation. The name calling must be more comfortable for the newspapers than grappling with their real problems.

When Tina Brown looks at the closure of Portfolio, she must worry for her future. Publications are now expected to turn a profit? Time for the notorious spendthrift to panic.

Christopher Buckley's family tell-all has already made him some enemies. Will people look more kindly on the writer's crusade to break the news of his father's suicide urge?

Golden Girls star Bea Arthur, née Bernice Frankel, died at home in Los Angeles at the age of 86 today. She passed away surrounded by family members. She will be loudly mourned by the gays.

It's as impossible to imagine the New York Observer without Peter Kaplan as it is to imagine him without a paper to edit. As he told Gawker, "I love my paper and my staff desperately."

Somali teen pirate sensation Abduwali Abdukhadir Muse (today's spelling!) went to court yesterday, and guess what, he cried. Will this give the NY Post the chance to use the term "Priva-Tears?" Let's find out!

Why would a WASPy medical student, engaged to be married, start robbing and killing hookers? The going theory is gambling debt. The suspect's media handle is now "The Craigslist Sex Gambling Death Killer." Officially.

Call it the final wave of the American invasion: A passel of tech executives from Google, YouTube, Twitter, and others, squired by a Wired feature writer, are touring Iraq.

Abdiwali Abdiqadir Muse is the biggest young star to hit New York since the inimitable Lady Gaga! He's a teen Somali pirate; he's already famous; and he's about to be demonized for our collective amusement!

How many hot-buttons does the news that the NSA wiretapped Congresswoman Jane Harman involve? Let's count: 1) public corruption, 2) "Israel Lobby" espionage, 3) intelligence agencies spying on lawmakers and 4) Bush's hyper-politicization of everything.

Sarah Palin, who is an idiot and therefore just doesn't get it, proudly told a pro-life conference that she considered an abortion before choosing to have Trig.

New York Daily News publisher Mort Zuckerman unleashed a screed yesterday on the Huffington Post about how the media never covers how bad it is for Israelis dealing with Palestinian terrorism. He should know.