Watch this chip careen around a park on a Segway chased by a man in a matching outfit.

This monkey looks extremely human while puffing away. Can't say we blame him one bit.

Crazy Cat wants to know why it is you pester him so? He just wants to hang out in his suitcase all day, but this human knows just the way to push Crazy Cat's buttons.

A quarter couldn't fit through this hole, but an octopus can— talk about a flexible crustacean!

This little hamster is both smart and yearns for freedom. This must be one of the greatest jailbreaks of all time.

This family's house cat attacked a bear, demonstrating once again that there is a fine line between bravery and stupidity.

In this preview clip, BBC America took what was probably the most usable minute of footage and slapped it into their preview. And in exactly zero of these shots did the chimps think to use a tripod, focus the lens, or even take some quick establishing shots. Instead it just looks like a Michael Bay movie.

If humans spoke like this, would anyone take them seriously— let alone applaud and embrace their humiliating efforts? No. Then why are we accepting such horrible attempts at dialogue from our beloved dogs? It's time to set some standards.

During morning talk shows they usually show pets that are up for adoption. Mr. Flufferskins and Dr. Smooches are cute additions to anyone's family. But it takes a certain badass to adopt and tame the untameable beast that is Robocat.

Awww, dog! You are adorable! You are also quite big and powerful, as compared to the silly little lobsters. Yet, you are so scared. Awww, dog, you are the best!

Shepard Smith, America's best newsman, had one of the finest broadcasts of storied career today on Studio B. There was a puppy, stuck in the LA river. It was rescued by a helicopter. Shepard Smith talked America through it.

From Bow to Wow, the Today Show segment which details the desperate stories of a handful of shelter dogs before giving them glamorous makeovers, rolled out four new puppy debutantes this morning: Paisley, Bradford, Miles, and Lancelot.

This man has enlisted the help of his small child as he attempts to catch an absolutely enormous spider in his home.

How long it will take us humans to realize that spiders look scary for a reason? That reason is to deter us from foolhardy stunts like this one.

Japan continues its cultural dominance over the entirety of American broadcasting with a game show in which animals navigate through a racecourse of dominoes while humans look on and cheer nervously.

Every squirrel fisherman knows that the best squirrel fishing technique is to tie a peanut on a string. Alas, they won't be making any squirrel burgers tonight, as this very determined squirrel is hungry and up to the challenge.

Two adorable kittens are climbing up the stairs when one doesn't quite make it...falling the whole entire flight down! But at the base we see he is a trooper! A little shaken up, but eight more lives to go.

Today's AFV Clip O' The Day launches the ancient dog vs. cat rivalry onto the intertubes. Question: does this dog's behavior qualify as trolling?

This polar bear sure loves hugging its doggie pal. Don't squeeze your little friend too tightly, bear!

Bear attacks are serious and one way to scare people straight is stop motion animation. It's the "safe" stylistic choice for this video; Michael Haneke is the only filmmaker "real" enough to film a staged murder by bear. Enjoy.

This cat hilariously slips around the transparent ice trying to catch the goldfish swimming under it.