This is Dov. He finished third in our Douche of the Decade poll. Now ask yourself: do you really want to encourage him by viewing American Apparel's latest porny NSFW advertisement? If so, click through. If not, kudos to you.

Coca-Cola planted an ordinary-looking vending machine in a college cafeteria and gave the student body an awesome surprise. Coke, please install many, many more of these!

In your deathly Wednesday media column: magazines set to perish in 2013, Jon Landman defended, Ted Koppel treated like a common whore, and Variety for sale, cheap!

The glasses face-tattoo dude was a Ray-Ban viral ad. Still hope the tattoo was real.

UPDATE: Joe Revitte from Dollar Van Demos sent this note telling his side of the story.

Axe just released this faux infomercial in hopes of getting guys to scrub their nether-reigons with what's essentially a jazzed-up loofah. Well, if hot girls and immature euphemisms can't sell a nut-scrubber, then good God, what will?

Oh look, yet another advertisement is using the metaphor of multiple planes crashing as a visual representation of the seriousness of some other cause. Fiery death: That's Allstate's stand. Just, maybe, use a different metaphor? [Copyranter. Click to enlarge.]

Well if the big G have their way you may be able to, according to this story about a recent patent application. The idea is that their software trawls Street View, identifies advertising space in the images then sells it.

This Russian billboard shows four tires and a condom, and reads, "A complete set of the road rubber." It is presumably meant to advertise tires. Do you get it? I don't get it. [Copyranter; Pic via. Click to enlarge]

Now that it's extracted as much publicity as possible from its unauthorized Obama billboard in Times Square, outerwear company Weatherproof now says it's planning to take down its giant ad in Times Square. [AP]

First PETA used Michelle Obama in an unauthorized ad; now, Weatherproof has plastered Barack's face on a billboard just because he wore their coat once. What's next, telling you the Obamas read our blog daily? No, we respect their privacy.

• It's a new day at Condé Nast. The mag giant's chief exec, Chuck Townsend, has gone from firing staffers to giving them motivational speeches. [NYO]
• In Touch's editor quit yesterday, reportedly because he wasn't happy that his bosses wouldn't agree to increase his $750,000-a-year salary. [NYP]
• Is MSNBC's Ed Schultz thinking about running for Senate? [HP, The Hill]
• A draft of the script for the third Twilight film has been leaked online. [WSJ]
• Fox's latest reality show, Our Little Genius, is stirring up controversy. [NYT]
• It looks like Sam Mendes will be directing the next James Bond movie. [MTV]
• Advertising: Hanes is pulling its TV ads featuring Charlie Sheen. [People]
• Taylor Swift's "Fearless" was the No. 1 selling album of 2008. In other Taylor-related news, Taylor Lautner is now the highest paid teenager in Hollywood.
• "Newspaper reporter" is officially one of the worst jobs in America. [HP]

In your wintry Wednesday media column: More and more and more Dana Milbank, short is good, freelancing sucks, and just let the NYT sell its ads, you ungrateful bastards.

Good news, cigarette fans: A judge (in Kentucky, of course) ruled that tobacco companies can use a wide array of colors in their cigarette ads. Bad news: Also full-color will be the graphic, mandatory "You will die" warnings, complete with nasty photos. Good news: Phillip Morris is willing to work with the FDA to gently guide you, the cigarette fan, towards a healthier lifestyle replete with a variety of smokeless tobacco options. For your health.
Bad news: "A cigarette manufacturer is not a physician."
[Pic: Copyranter]

Guinness rang in the new year—and their 250th anniversary— by airing this live fireworks display at 17:59 local Ireland time. Why 17:59? History states that Arthur Guinness signed the brewery's 9,000-year-lease on New Years Eve in 1759.