What's the fake crap word that corporations are using now to push the subtle psychological buttons that force dumb Americans to buy their shitty products? "Artisan." FYI.

For people whose job it is to turn unsuspecting suckers into corporate-advertising zombies, there's no better sight than a bunch of fresh-faced 18 year-olds moving boxes into a dorm room, ready to take on the world. Yeah, take on the world's debt. Don't forget your college-branded credit card and whatnot, suckers young adults!

In your bleary Wednesday media column: the WSJ's European publisher is forced to resign, paywalls come to college papers, Jennifer Granholm gets a TV show, a money back guarantee for advertisers and "Brother" Bill O'Reilly.

Yesterday Canada's National Post newspaper ran this rather questionable ad which alleged teaching children about gay and transgender tolerance would turn them into crazy schizophrenic homosexuals who don't know what gender they are. They have now apologized. Kinda.

We all know that newspapers decide which ads they'll run and which ads are inappropriate, right? Well a rather misguided ad was allowed to run in Canada's National Post today. This is just sad.

Americans have long been subjected to the fun, rapey Axe Body Spray ads, which attempt to demonstrate to awkward males that all they need to mate with the right girl is a little body spray, and maybe some roofies.

Check out this Wormrot video. You haven't seen hardcore until you've seen Wormrot, amirite? The most hardcore part of all: they are fully owned subsidiary of the Toyota corporation.

Not only are advertising professionals constantly making embarrassing racist faux pas, to our delight; the entire ad industry has a long and dismal history of failing at the most rudimentary "diversity" initiatives. It's run by white guys, like everything else! So the industry is taking baby steps towards true racial integration. Step one: Give Ourselves Awards.

Facebook is on track to take in several billion dollars in advertising revenue this year, which is weird because we have never actually clicked on a single Facebook ad ever. But liquor giant Diageo ran a study that found Facebook ads for two products in particular make people leave their computers and run to the store: Smirnoff and Baileys.

Here's a cute ad the Winklevoss twins made for Roll Global pistachios. The self appointed Facebook nemeses have been spending a lot on lawyers, and their big Facebook settlement was paid in illiquid private stock, so let's hope they got some real TV dough for this spot. YouTube money isn't going to keep anyone in Tucano murses. [AllThingsD]

Want to know what's wrong with kids these days? Good. I'll tell you. In my day, we had a concept known as "selling out." These days, there is new concept, called "selling out." Kids love it!

I bet the whole first half of this ad isn't even Tom Brady's feet. I bet he was like "Look, I'll do your UGG ad for a billion dollars but no way am I actually putting a pair of UGGs on my feet, even though I am the world's biggest metrosexual. That's not even manly enough for me, and look at my haircut." Also Mos Def changed his name immediately after doing the soundtrack to this ad, for obvious reasons.

Ad hominem adultery harassment site Cheaterville.com is incensed. They wanted to run the above advertisement in the Toronto Sun during the Toronto Film Festival, but the Sun rejected them. Why ever would a newspaper reject a crude doodle of a stick-man butt-fucking a startled stick-lady atop a rectangular void with his giant club-shaped dick?

Norwegian terrorist Anders Behring Breivik — a big fan of wetsuits, hazmat suits and Lacoste sweaters — has enraged iconic French fashion brand Lacoste by mentioning the company in his manifesto and wearing it repeatedly outside of jail. In fact, the unwanted attention is getting so bad that the company has written to Norwegian authorities to ask that they stop letting Breivik wear Lacoste. From the Telegraph:

In your soggy Wednesday media column: More Reuters poaching, a PR liar called out, America's Most Wanted returns, ad spending forecasts decline, and Felix Salmon does more stuff, somehow.

Food conglomerate ConAgra, maker of all remaining food, hired the PR firm Ketchum for a fun promotional stunt: it would invite a bunch of food bloggers to a fancy dinner at an Italian restaurant, then reveal that they'd actually been served frozen ConAgra food-like products instead of real food. Mirth and delight would ensue! Alas, ConAgra and Ketchum should have watched the old Chris Farley skit more closely.

Yesterday, the New York Times noted that now that almost a decade has passed since 9/11, some advertisers are trying to dip a toe into the "9/11 ads that will not automatically create an outraged uproar" waters.

Twitter is partnered with Apple, so maybe the microblogging service can get some advice from Steve Jobs on effective advertising. Or maybe it has; Twitter's new earthquake ad looks like nothing so much as a cry for help.

One funny thing that happened recently was when Nivea ran that ad that straight up said that Afros are not civilized. Remember that? Haha, those ad guys were on so much crack cocaine, I guess? Well now they've apologized!

Major fast food chains generally prefer to have kiddie touchers for mascots. But trend-setting Burger King has had enough with its "creepy" king. Get ready to experience what one expert calls "the Whole Foods effect":