Donald Trump has a big, bouncing beautiful set of economic plans—just see for yourself.

Tonight Donald Trump told the world that “Anyone who endorses violence, hatred or oppression is not welcome in our country and never will be.” Trump, of course, has never endorsed violence, hatred, or oppression—as you can see in the above video.

Jeb Bush—a man whose campaign has, one imagines, not followed the trajectory he hoped it might—has a new talking point: his daughter, Noelle, and her struggles with drug addiction, a subject he once explicitly requested the media not report on.

The campaign manager and communications director for the Ben Carson campaign have resigned, after Carson sort of promised to fire them, and then didn’t, earlier this month.

·The GOP establishment will probably learn to love Ted Cruz, a man every Republican in Washington currently hates, when and if they determine that they have no other options. (Marco Rubio isn’t just stagnant, but actually falling in recent national polls.) But they’ll fight him until they are absolutely sure they’re stuck with him. The opposition research has been coming at a furious pace. And so far, it’s a huge whiff.

Are you up to date on the election’s newest micro-controversy? Yesterday, the Washington Post published a cartoon depicting Ted Cruz’s daughters as trained circus monkeys, a reference to a recent political ad released by his campaign that uses Cruz’s admittedly adorable tots as, arguably, props. Later that night, after widespread condemnation [citation needed], the Post decided to pull the cartoon, drawn by Pulitzer winner Ann Telnaes.

Is Senator Marco Rubio running for president? Is that a stupid question? After all, there he was on stage last week in Las Vegas, speaking more than any candidate besides Cruz (he beat Trump!). He was, according to FiveThirtyEight, the most-attacked Republican candidate, too, which usually indicates frontrunner status. Except Marco Rubio isn’t a frontrunner in any poll, in any primary state; his popularity remains primarily theoretical. Is he actually doing anything to change that?

Donald Trump’s most important purely political skill (that is, one not directly related to his abilities as an entertainer and performer) is his ability to intuit what the great angry mass of movement conservatives wish their gutless leaders would say, and then say it. Other Republicans dogwhistle. Trump dispenses with coded language and simply says: We should deport all the illegals. We should ban all Muslim immigration. And now, on Vladimir Putin: “He’s running his country and at least he’s a leader, unlike what we have in this country.”

It’s only been a few minutes since the Trump campaign called for an open, sweeping policy of institutional bigotry at the federal level, and already his Republican rivals are chiming in.

At a campaign rally in Manassas, Virginia, yesterday, Donald Trump hoisted a young boy into the air so that he could ask a darling little question: “What will the wall be made out of?”

Donald Trump, who is currently leading Republican primary polls by saying things like, “I would bomb the shit out of ISIS,” revealed today more of his nuanced plans to combat the terrorist network. In a call to his fans at Fox & Friends, he said he would “take out the families” of ISIS members, too.

At a Democratic presidential debate in Iowa last month, Hillary Clinton was challenged to account for the fact that a large proportion of her campaign fundraising haul has come from the financial sector. She responded with a non sequitur about 9/11. Asked to elaborate, she seemed to argue that her popularity in the finance sector is primarily a result of personal relationships developed in the aftermath of that tragedy in lower Manhattan.

Donald Trump, a man known for accusing Megyn Kelly of having her period, cherishes women—oh yes. But did you know he cherishes men, too?

It is a fact that Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign, like her previous political campaigns, is funded in large part by donations from the finance industry. Bernie Sanders has criticized her for this—or, at least, he has pointed this out, critically. At tonight’s inconveniently scheduled Democratic debate on CBS, Sanders was asked to reiterate that criticism. Clinton’s response was, well, memorable.

In one of Seinfeld’s most memorable episodes, George spends the entire 30 minutes telling his friends about the great comeback he would have employed against an insulting coworker, if he’d thought of it at the time. At the end, he travels halfway across the country and painstakingly recreates the original situation just to tell the guy “The jerk store called, and they’re running out of you!” A sick burn that Ben Carson’s campaign almost landed on Donald Trump last night was kind of like that, too.

Rafael Cruz, father of Republican presidential candidate Ted, is the subject of a New York Times investigation which alleges that maybe he wasn’t quite the Molotov cocktail-tossing Cuban revolutionary he’s made himself out to be. Woe is the man whose dad’s tall tales become a matter of public concern.

There are only several hundred more days until the 2016 presidential election—have you picked your favorite candidate yet? No? Well, perhaps it would help to imagine each one of them, who are all so confident that they should be the next person to run this country into the ground, as a dog.

“I just think there ought to be a no-Twitter rule for candidates after 8 o-clock!” Jeb Bush told DailyMail.com yesterday. “There just should be, like, a rule.”

Ben Carson’s campaign continues on today, albeit without Ben Carson.

If Jeb Bush became a Democrat, I’m not saying he’d win the nomination, let alone the presidency, but he’d have a better shot at either than he currently does in the Republican Party.