What does this fuzzy little stumblebum—apparently named Munchkin—want? I don't know, but she's coming right over, fast.

Two people were struck by a train while hiking on a trestle hundreds of feet off the ground on Saturday near Lynchburg, Virginia, according to ABC News. One man was killed and his female friend was injured.

Months ago, I suggested starting a Building Implosions Reviews subblog on Gawker.com but was swiftly and permanently denied. In the months since good implosion content first hit our webspace, the implosion game has been upped—by a four-year-old kid.

Kabibe, a 15-month-old western lowland gorilla, was killed Friday when she darted under a closing hydraulic door at the San Francisco Zoo.

One of two students who drank punch at a Brown University frat house in mid-October has tested positive for date-rape drug GHB, the Providence Journal reports. Brown representatives sent out a campus-wide email announcing the test results on late Saturday, in compliance with the Clery Act.

Boston transit police have identified a man who stole the phone of a woman who was killed by a subway train on Thursday, reports the Boston Herald.

Today marks the 25th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall, and while brave brands attempt to commemorate the beginning of the end of the Cold War through native advertising online, citizens of Berlin gathered along the wall's former path and at Brandenburg Gate to memorialize the historic anniversary.

A member of the Saratoga County Sheriff's Office has been suspended without pay after a video surfaced online of the officer striking one civilian and threatening another during an otherwise peaceful interaction.

According to The Palm Beach Post, a 53-year-old Florida woman is facing criminal charges after, authorities allege, she stabbed her boyfriend for threatening her turtle.

An 88-year-0ld man—bless his heart—was robbed on Halloween night after openly counting out his casino winnings and then being followed by a crook who was greedy for the cash. Did the robber sneak up behind the man as he was leaving the casino? Why, no. He followed the guy for ten miles.

More than 18,000 nurses in California are planning to strike for two days beginning Tuesday over concerns about how prepared they are to deal with Ebola. According to Bloomberg News, the strike would affect 21 hospital and 65 clinics, all owned by Kaiser Permanente.

What little girl doesn't want a sparkling pink princess wand that holds a dark suicidal secret?

Two crust-coveting assholes succumbed to their inner Noids Wednesday night, brutally attacking a man for the crime of having some pizza, Scotland's Daily Record reports.

Bed bugs, used condoms, Ebola. New Yorkers now have one more reason to fear the subway: naked dudes. According to the New York Post, this naked dude was spotted earlier this week taking swigs from a bottle of Jack Daniel’s on the E train.

What looks like Mountain Dew, tastes like Doritos, and sounds just awful? If you guessed "Dewitos," a new soft drink concocted by the food criminals at Pepsi, congratulations, you're qualified to be an executive at America's largest food and beverage company.

You probably won't regret taking a few seconds to check out this chill owl's cute face. (No promises, obviously.)

It was supposed to be a night to remember. According to The Oregonian, after meeting online, Jeffrey Mack was planning to take the love of his life, Heather Dureen Hegre, out on their very first date.

On Saturday, President Obama named New York federal prosecutor Loretta Lynch as his pick for the next attorney general. If confirmed, Lynch would be the first African-American woman to hold the position.

Robin Williams had no alcohol or illegal drugs in his system when he died on August 11, according to details released by the Marin County coroner yesterday and reported by ABC News.

Beyoncé and Jay Z are allegedly planning on spending next year living in a French chateau, where they "hope to conceive their second child." Allons-y!