It's also really terrible, in a way that veers on high camp, but doesn't quite cross the border.

Rick Warren, the evangelical pastor who's made himself palatable to liberals grossed out by most idiot bible-thumpers, will give the invocation at Barack Obama's inauguration, proving that the President-elect is not the anti-christ, probably.

When did Ellen DeGeneres turn into such a yenta?

12/16 — When I was going to my parking garage after work, I saw a pristine Chevy Tahoe in Valet awaiting an entourage of scenester short dudes and EVAN RACHEL WOOD dressed like Cruella DeVille. They were dining at Chaya Venice. Swanky." [Hollywood PrivacyWatch is written by and for Defamer readers; send your sightings to tips@defamer.com.]

The FBI says the Chicago Tribune's Dec. 5 ROD BLAGOJEVICH scandal scoop didn't affect the timing of their Dec. 9 arrest, as had earlier been reported. That dude was so dirty they could just arrest him pretty much whenever, okay? [WSJ]

We've already enjoyed a hearty laugh at Variety's expense for confounding the two crazy Tracys. A slightly gaucher gaffe, however, comes to us via EW.com, who accidentally went live with Lena Horne's pre-written obit.

Should the New York Times Co. sell its stake in the Boston Red Sox? Some people say yes. But this clever Monopoly metaphor says NO:

An ode to our Hopey President-elect from a recent Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco; pic by anthonysanfrancisco via SFist.

Times are tough at what was Silicon Valley's hottest startup last year. So tough that one Facebooker is auctioning off a company-issued Jack Spade laptop bag.

Invest in Caterpillar! Obama's gonna nominate his second Republican, and it's Illinois Rep. Ray LaHood for Transportation Secretary. Which is eh and kinda lame.

We'll admit to having trouble ourselves keeping Tracy Morgan the very real blueberry muffin enthusiast separate from Tracy Jordan, the virtually identical interactive-porn magnate he plays on 30 Rock.

[Ponzi schemer Bernie Madoff, who's on partial house arrest until he faces trial for robbing everyone of billions of dollars, takes a leisurely stroll through the Upper East Side this afternoon; image via Getty]

Woo, the feud between Conrad Black and Michael Wolff—an incarcerated media mogul fraudster and a self-absorbed media gossip—is heating up! Which of these two ridiculous men is more deserving of your scorn? Let's see:

Rocco DiSpirito used to be a critically-acclaimed chef, but then he did that show the Restaurant and then Top Chef and The Biggest Loser and finally Dancing With the Stars. Now nobody respects him!

America got its first glimpse of Ryan Seacrest reality brainchild Momma's Boys last night.

• That was quick. After making a splashy debut in NYC back in May (and after paying Nicole Richie to come to Moscow two weeks ago), 16-year-old Russian heiress/designer Kira Plastinina now says she plans to close most of her 12 locations in the U.S. [FWD]
• In related news, retail sales in Russia are reportedly down 30 to 40 percent. [WWD]
• Coco Rocha's new look. [Fashionologie]
• More on Betsey Johnson's "smaller, friendlier" plans for Fashion Week. [WSJ]
• Sadly, this week is likely the last for Bill Blass. [NYT]
• Kate Moss has re-signed with Topshop for another three years. [Telegraph]

Why did crooked governor ROD BLAGOJEVICH'S fancy lawyer Ed Genson take the case? Because "it's fun"! For him, at least. Click to watch this silver-tongued master of sophistry woo the press, stupidly.

You know what we just noticed? The 'Bernie Madoff Robs Everyone and Alienates His Family' story is kind of similar to that of the Bluth family from the brilliant-but-canceled Arrested Development. Let's do a who's-who comparison!

Last week we wondered if First Niece Lauren Bush might want to think about doing something new and exciting with those burlap FEED bags she's carrying around to every party she's attended for more than a year now. We're thrilled to see she seems to have taken our advice to heart: A FEED-branded Baby Bjorn strikes us as the perfect way to demonstrate her concern for both world hunger and little kids. Nicely done! [GoaG, previously]

The director of Pirates of the Caribbean is planning Second Life: The Movie. Too late! The lonely virtual world lost its buzz two years ago. Why is Hollywood always so behind the times?