[One of the famed Oscar Meyer Weinermobiles crashed into a Mount Pleasant, Wisconson house yesterday evening after losing control. Nobody was home or injured. Report via AP. Caption via pubb13.]

Fresh after this week's sobering slideshow of our troops in the Middle East, Matchbox toys comes out with an oddball ad campaign to spark kids' war fantasies of returning home draped in the American flag.

Setting an example for children of royalty, everywhere, Megan McCain wants people to know that the help should stick to being the help after explaining what depths Joe The Plumber should intellectually excavate next. Hint: It's near his plumber's crack.

Where Tom Cruise and Beyonce meet in the middle. Where Jennifer Anniston terrifies West Villagers with her half-speed biological clock. Where Jon Gosselin's girlfriend terrifies virginal high school boys. Where Andy's Dick's Little One speaks. Your Saturday Late-Edition Gossip Roundup:

If they only had a heart. Upon seeing this week's spine-tingling video of Michael Jackson's '84 Pepsi ad accident, Pepsi and vid director Bob Giraldi don't give a shit. The international moment of dead pop star respect is officially finito.

Feeling sprightly after recovering from wrist surgery yesterday, Pope Benedict the &!# gives that corrupter of innocence Harry Potter and flagrant 'mosexual Oscar Wilde the thumbs up. It's another loony episode of "That's Our Benny!"

Is Amazon.com just trying to be creepy? It's already headed by a "chuckling maniac" being sued over defective Kindles and swindling newspapers on the e-book reader. Now his company is quietly deleting people's Kindle books. It's Orwellian. Literally.

Walter Cronkite, the longtime CBS News journalist and trusted anchorman, has passed away, his family said. He was 92.

Do you feel that? Those are George Carlin's acid tears falling from heaven. There are some mainstays on the millionaire funny-man list. But there is one depressing shocker. Can you guess who?

This week, junior mogul Jared Kushner found love, no one found work, and a teleprompter and a local artist died.

Meet Barbara Lavandeira, or, as she's known online, PerezHilton.com. She's actually pretty normal, when not pretending to be her brother.

A major challenge in Harry Potter 6 is that the teenage wizard had the ability to get a boner. So how did the kid-friendly franchise deal with the prickly issue of teenage sexuality? Splendidly! But perhaps in an unintended direction.

[Jim Behrle's Kreepie Kats investigate Sonia Sotomayor's judicial temperament. Klick to enlarge!]

Biz Stone is selling his two-bedroom home in the Berkeley Hills. The Twitter co-founder didn't say why "it's time to move;" maybe to live closer to Twitter HQ in San Francisco, or maybe he's just outgrown this artist's hovel.

Have some exciting info you'd like to share? Email tips@cityfile.com.

Oh, god. The White House just announced a prime time press conference for next week. And they announced it on Twitter! Hey @whitehouse, that is rly stupid.

• A group of 21 stores on the Lower East Side are coming together to offer a weekend of discounts in honor of the (capsule) trade show that's currently underway. [Pipeline, Cut]
• Modeling rates really must falling: A Hugo Boss model has been charged for taking part in the robberies of 15 gas stations and delis. [NYP]
• Eddie Bauer will survive, after all. A private equity firm is buying the company out of bankruptcy for a whopping $284 million. [BN]
• Rihanna half-shaved her head this week. Exciting! Don't think for a moment, though, it was an original move on Rihanna's part, says an outraged Joe Zee of Elle. [People, Twitter]

[Boba Fett! Playing an accordion! On 10th Ave and 20th Street! Whee. Image via Holly Northrop's Flickr]

We finally know how much aspiring Hollywood mogul Jay Penske has agreed to pay industry blogger Nikki Finke: according to the NYT's David Carr: $400,000 a year for the next eight years. Pretty good money, but not $14 million.

There's a war on. You probably knew that, in the sense that you read somewhere about a major offensive in Afghanistan. But if you're like us, you haven't seen many photos. It looks like Vietnam over there.