It must pain Jann Wenner to see his other properties start succeeding where flagship Rolling Stone squandered possibilities and descended into irrelevancy: online. Now that US Weekly's site has heat, Wenner's finally starting to line up RS's strategy of "whatever."

Gawker guest editor Natasha VC, doing retrospective reviews of bar/bat mitzvahs she's been to.

There's a line in a song: "All the freaky people make the beauty of the world." And then there's this: a blog taking photos of Wal-Mart patrons. Cruel? Yes. Hysterical? Absolutely. But fascinating. And somehow, art.

Journalism continues staggering pushes forward on an otherwise ordinary Sunday! In the great "tradition" of mixing up people like Matt Lauer and Meredith Viera with public drunks like Hoda and Kathy Lee, The Today Show's newest hire? Jenna Bush. Whee!

Remember George Gombossy? He's the longtime Hartford Courant reporter who was fired after filing a column exposing the shady practices of the Manny Noriega-esque mattress retailer, Sleepy's. Well, the Courant's looking for his replacement. Future of consumer journalism, your qualifications:

So, L.A., apparently, you're on fire, we hear? 3,000 homes on the northeastern edge of the city are currently being evacuated after 20,000 acres have already been burned. Want to see what it looks like in 24 seconds?

After winning $1B in settlements, as they claim, you'd assume the law firm that Erin Brockovitch was based on would be solvent. Wrong! Masry & Vititoe filed for bankruptcy after being sued by the estate of the dead namesake partner.

So, Mediaite's Rachel Sklar did a piece about cars. What? Yes: cars. Ray Wert at Gawker Media car blog Jalopnik posted on it. Sklar dove in the comments. Car people are insane. What do you think happened? Results pictured. Enjoy.

Old guys: Jon Gosselin's still around, Paul McCartney still has lady problems. Brody Jenner, Joe Francis: small penises. Pattinson, Stewart, and the sacred word. Fire Island, the East Village, Africa: we are the world. Presenting your Sunday Morning Gossip Roundup:

Remember that shoe-throwing Iraqi journalist who tossed one at Dubya in December? Muntadhar al-Zeidi's being released from prison early, for good behavior. Meanwhile, don't know about newspaper economics in Iraq, but the Baghdad Expos: still need a good splitter. [MSNBC]

Two lucky souls hit the Mega Millions jackpot last night: one of them lived in the South Bronx, and the other one in San Gabriel, California. Looks like the West Coast winner (update: isn't) an Alt-Porn goddess named Annaliese Nielsen.

Not that trailer parks aren't already established as traditional American targets for tornadoes, domestic violence, and meth labs, they're crossing the threshold into killing grounds. In Georgia, a slaying left seven dead and two critically injured, with few details known.

While America's medical debates rage on, many of its significant members, of all colors and sizes, limply, quietly weep to themselves: penises. But! This is one health care package making serious progress: flaccid penises demand innovation, as the Times discovered.

The South Bronx, the South South Bronx is where one of two winning Mega Millions tickets were sold. The other one was in San Gabriel, California. Each winner receives $166.5M, and neither will invest in a Josh Harris startup. [NYT]

Calling Glenn Beck an easy target's calling a spade out by its raw materials. Duck tests of his M.O. are so painfully obvious, even he's openly talking about it now. Contained herein: Psychiatrists, bullies, his Heavenly Father, and attackers!

Curious about what it's like to be shot in the head? Here you go.

Josh Harris—the Silicon Valley O.G. who washed up when the 1.0 tech bubble burst—had his second life profiled by the Sunday Styles. Harris is the ultimate Where Are They Now? of the tech scene. And where is he?

Not that it's much consolation, but a Scientific American piece going viral explains that those suffering from depression are at an "evolutionary paradox" and are more evolved thinkers than happy-go-lucky types due to their analytical nature. Viva Wellbutrin. [Scientific American]

Ted Kennedy's funeral is underway, and so is the full court press barrage of media. Obama's delivering his remarks now. What do attendees, Twitter, Free Republic, and others have to say?

Well, if Gus Van Sant's rockstar suicide porn Last Days wasn't vicarious enough for you, you can now play as a Kurt Cobain-like character in Guitar Hero 5, replete with the infamous Daniel Johnston shirt. Via Fimoculous, game trailer below.