The finale of Fox's Hell's Kitchen was last night. We won't tell you who won the competition, but "Most Awkward" prize goes to now-dead Gourmet magazine, which was prominently featured in the show! Click to watch the painful highlight clip.

Many in Hollywood media wondered how Nikki Finke would play up or ignore yesterday's much heralded release of "The Brown List" of Most and Least Liked Execs compiled by the Hollywood Temp Diaries.

If you're going to eventually catch swine flu anyway, you might as well perform a little volunteer work in the process. Earlier today, Mayor Bloomberg announced a "Flu Fighters" program, which will recruit 800 volunteers to help the city spread the word about getting vaccinated for both swine flu and seasonal flu. Among other things, volunteers will be asked to help "manage the flow of people in and out of weekend vaccination centers that will be set up around the city." This will bring you into contact with thousands of totally random (and possibly infected) New Yorkers, and you'lll ost likely fall ill a few days later. But the city will thank you for your service. And at least you can now coordinate your H1N1 infection around your busy schedule, which isn't such a bad thing. [NYC.gov, AP]

The Wall Street Journal uses an astounding 30 to 60 staffers to produce an underwhelming webcast knockoff of CNBC, says Business Insider. (Update: WSJ says closer to 10.) That would help explain the rumors that the newspaper is hemorrhaging money.

Well, there was an interesting life. Nat Finkelstein, Factory photographer, is dead, at 76.

A&E purchased the reality show The Jacksons: A Family Dynasty which will feature appearances by the late Michael Jackson's three kids, Prince, Paris, and Blanket. Thankfully, at least one Jackson thinks this is a bad idea.

Where was CBS on that whole David Letterman affair scandal, hmmm?? Oh yea: They were airing hours upon hours Letterman's own explanations of it. Which were masterful. Now, CBS News wants to get to the bottom of it. Meh. Don't.

Firings, sell-offs, suicide stories and Joe Pesci's leftovers; It's a bummer of a day for everyone in Hollywood who is not locked into the role of James T. Kirk.

Those low-flying helicopters that have been hovering over Manhattan today? They could be connected to a movie shoot last week that involved helicopters. But they could also be up to something else. Either way, though, the NYPD would like you to know they they're totally cool with it and it's all above board, so don't freak out and call 911, 311 or whatever hotline you're technically supposed to call in cases of mysterious, low-flying helicopters. [NYT]

What's on Mike Bloomberg's schedule today? Oh, he's heading to Staten Island to campaign for Borough President James P. Molinaro's reelection, with his good friend Rudy Giuliani! He loves Rudy again!

Who hasn't invited a crazy lady home, hired her as a publicist, or worked for her as a high priced hooker? Everyone! We've seen how these things end, and it's with Amanda Woodward saving us all from boredom.

People magazine's "inside story" about Padma Lakshmi's pregnancy doesn't address the big question, namely who it is who impregnated the Top Chef hostess and ex-wife of author Salman Rushdie. (The fact that she got pregnant even though she suffers from endometriosis isn't all that uncommon, as the doctors quoted in the article point out.) In fact, People doesn't even speculate as to who the dad is, except to say that it is not her cousin. (Gee, thanks, People!) Nor does it make any mention of the man she's been dating the past year or two—and who we strongly suspect is Padma's baby daddy—elderly billionaire Teddy Forstmann. Which is especially weird considering even Forbes is comfortable mentioning their relationship (and Forbes isn't usually in the habit of being more gossipy than People.) But then the magazine gets even more ridiculous and examines how Padma is going to survive as a single mom. Raising kids isn't cheap, you know!

This "The Internet" thing is nice, but we often think: What it really needs is a self-proclaimed arbiter of its cultural relevance to undertake the preposterously impossible ambitious task of explaining the entire internet. In a book. Hello, Virginia Heffernan!

Oct. 13 @ 4pm Laughing, walking toward her trailer. Penn Badgley was walking ahead but I totally missed him because I am an idiot and was so taken aback by her beautiful presence. [Submit Gawker Stalker sightings to stalker@gawker.com]

[Vanity Fair editor Todd S. Purdum tries really hard to agree that Tina Brown looks just like Princess Di when the two toured the "Diana: A Celebration" exhibit in Philadelphia yesterday. Image via Getty]

The Conde Nast trickle continues: Layoff day at Vogue today? Email us with any news.

Sam Sifton, the New York Times' brand new restaurant critic issued his very first review today! DBGB, the most recent addition to Daniel Boulud's dining empire (and "one of our more gregarious and intelligent restaurateurs, according to Sifton) landed a solid two stars from the man chosen to succeed Frank Bruni. Do forgive him, though, for starting off the review with the words, "Hey, ho, let's go!" He's new around here and probably pretty excited about his new gig, which makes him the city's most powerful food person. But he should calm down after he eats his way through the first 100 meals or so. [NYT]

If you didn't get married to someone you don't know in a sea of 20,000 cult members yesterday, you may have missed your chance. It looks like the Reverend Sun Myung Moon has performed his final mass wedding.

JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon shared some delightful news this morning. As expected, the bank posted super-solid earnings for the third quarter, generating $3.6 billion in profit based on $26.6 billion in revenue, results that were considerably higher than what Wall Street analysts were expecting. The House of Dimon also revealed that it's set aside $8.79 billion for compensation and benefits for the first nine months of 2009, just about enough to pay out $353,834 to each JPMorgan Chase employee. But don't think that's a good thing. It isn't! Because Goldman Sachs set aside $386,429 per employee for the first half of the year, and will likely put JPMorgan to shame when it reports earnings tomorrow. If you were thinking this world was unjust because millions of Americans don't have decent health insurance and a billion children around the world live below the poverty line, do yourself a favor and head over to JPMorgan HQ on Park Avenue later this afternoon and observe the people streaming out of the building. That, friends, is the true face of misery. [WSJ, Bloomberg]