John Mayer getting his hair cut at Sally Hershberger's salon in the meatpacking district ... Celine Dion getting into an SUV ... Chris Noth walking to the set of Sex and the City 2 ... Michael Douglas working out on a treadmill at the Equinox on 77th Street ... Naomi Watts walking to her apartment building in NoHo ... Ivanka Trump signing autographs after an appearance on Regis & Kelly ... Alessandra Ambrosio shopping with her daughter in the West Village ... Taylor Momsen talking on her cell phone while standing on the Gossip Girl set ... Hugh Jackman and wife Deborah Lee walking in SoHo ... Ed Westwick and Jessica Szohr arriving at Ed's apartment ... Tim McGraw getting out of an SUV ... Edie Falco shooting scenes for Nurse Jackie ... Usher walking outside ... Penelope Cruz leaving her hotel en route to JFK ... and Rihanna heading into a recording studio downtown.

Even as the magazine industry has crumbled in the Great Magazine Die-Off, publishers have always been able to assure themselves: "At least we're the only ones who can win National Magazine Awards." ¡No mas! Now, even we're eligible.

Today, Pulitzer-winning New York Times political columnist Maureen Dowd answers the question, "what would you hear if Dick Cheney put you on hold?" The answer may surprise you!

Did you watch the debate between Mike Bloomberg and Bill Thompson last night? Or did you conclude it would be a big waste of time since the election was predetermined before the campaigning even began and you figured that if you did tune in and you happened to find yourself enamored with Thompson, it would only lead to heartbreak next month when he's clobbered at the polls?

Behold the power of three: two married stars are constantly inviting "guest stars" over, another couple broke up because of a third, and a knocked-up actress is in a triangle with two fathers. On the count of three...

A tiny baby kangaroo named Skippy was abandoned by his mother in a Louisiana wildlife center, but a lady raised him herself and he's just fine. Skippy's now chief marketing officer of Procter & Gamble. [Pic of similar organism: AP]

• Whoopi Goldberg has gone into contract to sell her two-bedroom loft at 101 Wooster Street. The comedian, actress, and View co-host put the apartment on the market for $3.99 million back in June and closed on the purchase of a home in West Orange, NJ just last week. [Cityfile, Sotheby's]
• After going into contract (and falling out of contract) multiple times, the triplex penthouse at 895 Park that belonged to the late movie producer and clothing entrepreneur Charles Evans has finally found a buyer. The four-bedroom apartment, which was first offered for $29.5 million in 2007, was purchased for $15 million by Robert Weisz, the CEO of the commercial real estate company the RPW Group, and his wife Cristina. [Cityfile]

It's a big day for Jewish fashion designers from the outer boroughs, clearly: Brooklyn native Isaac Mizrahi turns 48 today; meanwhile, the Bronx's very own Ralph Lauren is turning 70. Others celebrating today: Usher is turning 31. Yankees manager Joe Girardi turns 45. Actor Roger Moore is 82. Marc Jacobs' longtime business partner, Robert Duffy, is turning 55. Natalie Maines of the Dixie Chicks is 35. Czech model Daniela Pestova is 39. Sports radio host Jim Rome is turning 45. Writer Katha Pollitt turns 60. Wrestler/actress Stacy Keibler is 30. And Madonna's daughter, Lourdes Leon, who looks like she's turning 21, is actually turning 13 today.

• After another wild day in court, Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook settled their latest round of legal issues yesterday. But not before Brinkley called her ex an "extreme narcissist," and Cook returned the favor by telling reporters she was an "angry, bitter, vindictive woman." At least it's nice to know they still have feelings for each other, though! [NYP, NYDN]
• As easy as it is to picture Courtney Love sitting in front of her computer punching numbers into an Excel spreadsheet, it turns out she may not be the best financial planner in the world. Love owes $300K in back taxes, according to the government. [TMZ]
• Michael Lohan says he knows who Lindsay's drug dealer is and he plans to reveal all in an effort to "save" his daughter. So who is he? "He has no job. He does nothing. All he does is supply everyone in LA." Call us crazy, but supplying "everyone" in LA sounds like a pretty good job to us. [Radar, NYDN]
• Get ready to see a lot more of Megan Fox dressed in, well, not much: Giorgio Armani has tapped her to star in his new underwear ad campaign. [WWD]

War and profit have long been pals. Governments and corporations make scads of dough on invasions, attacks, contracts and such. So why shouldn't some of that profit help recruit a record amount of new, financially strapped soldiers, right?

Child labor activists are aiming for Pam Anderson. Rush Limbaugh, shockingly, loves racist clubs. Jon Gosselin no doubt hates giving up $180,000. And Ashton Kutcher was mean to January Jones. Good morning! It's your Wednesday morning gossip roundup...

If imitation's the highest form of flattery, what's the action figure? The pint-sized likeness, once dominated by the likes of G.I. Joe, has become playground to the political elite. And now Michelle Obama's joining the plasticine ranks.

Struggling movie mogul Harvey Weinstein and his brother Bob are selling off their controlling stake in the struggling social network aSmallWorld, according to the LA Times. (The buyer is Patrick Liotard-Vogt, an heir to the family that founded Nestle.) Clearly the site and Weinstein boys have both seen better days, and with the Weinstein Co. now focused on getting out from under a mountain of debt, presumably even a hundred-dollar bill for a site that hasn't been relevant in half a decade is better than nothing. But the saddest footnote to the story? In the three years that Harv owned part of the social networking site, he never found time to set up a profile, it seems:

Facebook commands 60 percent of the social networking market, up 200% from last year.

"Volare" singer Al Martino who played the Don's godson, Johnny Fontane in The Godfather, has died at the age of 82. Friend Jerry Blavat described Martino, who got his start in 1952, as "the last of the show business legends."

Kids these days sure know how to keep us horrified. Just when we think the little bastards can't get any more psychotic, five middle school boys have been arrested for setting a 15-year old classmate alight. Why?

Roman Polanski's finishing his final movie from his jail cell. What a hard worker!

Murderous scientists have proven that animals slaughtered for Jewish and Muslim religious sacrifices feel the pain, but stunning the animal first terminates the torture. So, animal rights activists, it's time for a whole new type of holy war. [New Scientist]

Weinstein Company is selling its exclusive social network for rich people to a Swiss heir, the Los Angeles Times is reporting. At last, circumstances have forced the company to do what it should have done years ago.

Obama's ideological opponents are grasping at straws here: they've carved "I Swastika Obama" message into the grass at a country club, institutions that were once bastions of American racism. This should be a perfect inflammatory storm, but it's just bewildering.