Haiti still dominates the front pages. As do slightly racy-looking images of President Obama stumping for Martha Coakley in Massachusetts. Either Obama is consistently about to make out with her, or picture editors find it amusing to imply it.

According to a University of California study, anyway. They found that of 156 female students the blondes were "used to getting more attention and being treated better by others." Which made them more aggressive and determined when things went wrong.

Page Six report that Coulter's ex, Andrew Stein, defended her against allegations she looked emaciated by saying:

Amy Winehouse's self-destruction takes an unexpected turn into bimboland. Jersey Shore's stars get greedy and want fake boobs. NBC infighting escalates. LaToya Jackson has a new shot at fame. Tila Tequila takes aim at Megan Fox. Jai ho, Monday gossip.

Rich, powerful people who are sent to jail for insider trading when their friends wear a wire for a year are famously forgiving. They'll probably just shrug off a WSJ article outlining the Donnie Brasco-esque ways they were betrayed.

Before she was a bubblegum bad girl, Ke$ha was just another silky-haired teenager wedging herself into camera frames with Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie, building a reality show spectacle in a Nashville-based Simple Life episode with her mom.

Jay is just being "a good soldier" in the debacle between Conan, NBC and he, says a longtime producer. The chin is an innocent victim here. [AP]

A song made famous by a 62-year-old American Idol auditioner too old to qualify for the show has reached the exuberant ass-slapping hands of the NFL's oldest quarterback. No, he does not grasp the irony.

Rep. Steve King on illegal Haitian immigrants: "If they are deported, Haiti is in great need of relief workers, and many of them could be a big help to their fellow Haitians." Maybe Royal Caribbean will give them a ride?

Paul Dano got his start in the super indie film "L.I.E." Then he did bigger things like "Little Miss Sunshine" and "There Will Be Blood." Now he returns to his indie roots with what sounds like the indiest indie ever.

Royal Caribbean says sipping mojitos and working your tan mere miles from places where corpses are piled in the streets is America's humanitarian duty. We all have our crosses to bear.

A moment of silence for Azaria Jagger, whose long-time Flintstone multivitamin pill addiction culminated in a sugary-sweet calcium-fortified death today. In her final moment, she tweeted:

During Michael C. Hall's walk to receive his Golden Globe, the camera panned to Bill Paxton. Rumors on the internet claim he appears to be saying "I knew he was going to beat me. I got beaten by cancer." Yikes.

In what is perhaps one of the greatest moments of all time, Bill Hicks singlehandedly decimates pop music culture and defines the meaning of a punch line. They don't make then like this anymore.

Are you experiencing slight queasiness, back pain and/or ineffable sadness? It's not those oyster shooters: You missed the Golden Globes! Lucky for you, we've got your back. Here are all the best heart-tugging, funny, and weird moments from tonight's festivities.

On Friday—one day after the last-minute cancellation of her concert—Lady Gaga stopped by Oprah to perform a medley of her hits and chat with the Queen of Daytime. Here's what you can take away from the appearance.

Daily Intel's Gabriel Sherman posted a report today with sources noting that the New York Times is "close to announcing" the return of an online content paywall. Questions, then: Is it true? Will it work? And will it matter?

That's right, you celebrity-obsessed awards show junkies, we're virtually crashing the Hollywood Foreign Press Association's drunken dinner party, and we're going to be talking bad about it all night. Please come join us. We'll give you a trophy!

In these times of economic woes and terrifying natural disasters, it can be easy to forget what really matters in life: Pretty dresses! So we here Gawker will, as a public service, be providing photos from tonight's Golden Globe awards.

N. R. Kleinfield's piece about laundromats in today's Times NY/Region section is pretty great, fun reading. And also, hysterically, fairly poetic. First two lines: "At the laundromat, irregular things happen. People square off over washers - mine; no, mine." [NYT]