On the same day Farrah's mother was arrested for choking her, Teen Mom happened to air a brand new episode. Is it possible to look at their relationship objectively anymore? Absolutely, because it's been crumbling for weeks now.

You could have stayed at home to watch horrific, bloody scenes of human misery unfold on TV. Or you could have jetted over to Milan, where the espresso is better and this week's menswear shows have been all about death and violence. Before you go and ask whether some members of the fashion industry are a little out of touch with what's going on in the world—is it really appropriate to send models down the runway covered in fake blood when every news network is broadcasting images of bloody survivors of the earthquake in Haiti?—keep in mind that war and other forms of human tragedy are actually good for the fashion biz. After all, they stimulate creativity! As Guy Trebay of the Times explains it:

Artie Lange visited Late Night in November 2008, as Conan O'Brien prepared his move to Los Angeles to take over The Tonight Show. Lange did not want O'Brien to leave, and his words about it then ring eerily true today.

A porn star and a stripper are trying to beat prostitution charges on a grammatical technicality after prosecutors put "and" in a document where they should have put "or." Luckily for the women, they have a lawyer who—solely on the basis of the following quote—we picture (correctly, it turns out) to be a hilariously stereotypical sleazoid attorney:

This week's episode marked the directorial debut of cast member Neil Patrick Harris and was the 101st episode of the show. It also may have had some fun at the expense of CBS's very own Julie Chen. Uh-oh!

Gossip is already flying about Fire Island, the getaway for New York's A-list gays. Long-time monopolizer Eric von Kuersteiner—who owns practically everything in the community—has sold all his properties to a mysterious 23-year-old gay kid.

How desperate are New York Times employees? A tipster tells us that a thief recently stole 27(!) laptop computers from the NYT's headquarters—and some think it may have been an inside job. The sordid details:

Someone must be playing a joke on the Fox and Friends anchors: dead air time, cuts to videos that don't exist, and a text overlay saying "The People's Seat Senate Shocker" at the same time Gretchen mentions a "major blow."

In the wee hours of the morning our Deadspin brahs launched an important investigation: Was Venus Williams wearing any underpants at her Australian Open match yesterday? A frame-by-frame analysis for those who dare, lies here.

The place to experiment with your account.

Pranksters have tricked the host of a Christian call-in show into expounding on the spiritual implications of The Fresh Prince of Bell Air and Star Wars.

In which a born-and-raised, dyed-in-the-wool Boston liberal (transplanted to New York) tries to make sense of the big old hulking electoral mess that is his home state right now.

A new documentary about superfamous/ semi-anonymous street artist Banksy is reportedly screening at Sundance this year, and Banksy pieces (another photo below) are popping up around Park City, Utah. After Mali and New Orleans, we guess he deserves a vacation.

With Scott Brown's stunning, come-from-behind victory over the boring lady who hated baseball in Massachusetts, the Democrats must admit defeat. Please welcome our new unstoppable Republican Superminority.

It isn't just conservative lawmakers who are worried about New Jersey's new medical marijuana law, which gives people with debilitating diseases the right to purchase up to two ounces of marijuana each month. Pot dealers are concerned, too! "It's going to cut a lot of the bridge-and-tunnel customers," one dealer tells the Daily News, adding that if he tried to compete with the legal stuff based on price, he'd lose "hundreds of thousands of dollars a year." If you're out of work and were thinking about dealing a bit on the side to pay the bills—not such a bad idea, at least up until now!—you make want to think about some other way to make quick cash. [NYDN]

Cold season is one of the worst times of year. The good news is that it gives you a perfect excuse to make the cold remedy mom never wanted you to know about: the Hot Toddy.

Michelle Obama surprised a White House tour group and it is streaming on the internet! And Bo is there!

Former Manhattan District Attorney Robert Morgenthau retired at the end of 2009 at the tender age of 90. Did you expect him to move to some sunny retirement community and play golf for the rest of his days? Pen a memoir and reflect on his 35-year career as DA? That isn't his plan. Morgenthau reports he's joining Wachtell Lipton, the notoriously aggressive corporate law firm that represents some of the biggest banks in America. [BW]

Colbert, obviously a member of Team CoCo proper, joins the party of NBC bashers before getting up close and personal with speed skating record holder Tucker Fredricks. The unimpressed athlete challenges Stephen to race his mother.

Arthur "Young AG" Sulzberger XVIII, heir to throne of the New York Times paid online internet empire, hath tracked down yet another important story in his ongoing quest to become the Metro section's most quirkiest cub reporter who will be everyone else's boss one day. Here is what Young Sulzberger learned in the course of his routine perambulations: a certain oafish ruffian has been terrorizing the law-abiding residents of the Village of Greenwich as of late. Notable in and of itself? Sadly not; the streets of our fair city have become alarmingly less safe since the immigrant gangs made their way of Five Points.