Target stores are basically run by Hamas. Andrea Peyser explains.

Here is Chris "much dumber son of Mike" Wallace on the Don Imus show hoping that Sarah Palin sits in his lap this Sunday. You know what? People who want to be taken seriously should really stop doing Imus!

This morning, on Good Day New York, Rosanna, Greg and the crew of SkyFoxHD, the Fox 5 newscopter, were mesmerized by a buoy in the Hudson River. What is it doing there? Investigate that, Fox 5!

Zac Posen lost his shit because Harper's Bazaar wanted him to stand next to Sesame Street's The Count in a fashion shoot. It was the only way he could get into the magazine "as a non-advertiser," EIC Glenda Bailey said.

Yale's endowment has recently plummeted to a marginally less insane multiple of billions of dollars. In addition to layoffs and salary freezes, the nobles of New Haven may soon find themselves subjected to an agonizing bout of extreme survival training.

This Shiba Inu has obviously been boning up on his Dale Carnegie, because he's figured out that a genuine smile is the key to success. Get it, "boning up"? Sorry, had to do it.

Kate Winslet shopping in SoHo with her son ... Jonathan Rhys Meyers walking into the Mercer Hotel with girlfriend Reena Hammer ... Bono and wife Ali Hewson at a bakery on Madison Avenue ... Channing Tatum getting in an SUV at JFK ... Ashley Olsen arriving at ABC studios for an appearance on Good Morning America ... Blake Lively carrying her dog inside her coat on the set of Gossip Girl ... Paris Hilton getting out of a car in front of the Late Show with David Letterman ... Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz attending a Knicks game at Madison Square Garden ... and John Travolta leaving the Plaza with Kelly Preston and daughter Ella.

This video featuring kids going crazy for "Violin Hero" seems like something the Trans-Siberian Orchestra would produce after a three day bender of Pop Rocks and YouTube videos.

Apparently this little boy only likes his mom when she gives him cookies.

Peggy Wilkins is an average heterosexual 45 year-old Chicago woman who had to rent an entire apartment above her own to hold her massive, encyclopedic Playboy collection. Gurl U no U always B our friend. [Chicago Reader via Romenesko]

We all need a hobby and logging a library of fetish films is just as valid as knitting. This singer lost all her money thanks to her husband's extra-curricular boyfriends. This actor's spends his off-time creating on-set drama. Relax, everyone.

Lost fans are rabid, but there are just as many people who haven't seen it at all. So Newsweek decided to have their employees who have never watched it before try to explain what's going on. And it's hilarious.

[Sex person Cynthia Nixon in The City yesterday; image via INF]

The six-foot high 1960 Alberto Giacometti sculpture "Walking Man I" sold yesterday for $104.3 million, the most ever paid for a work of art. Unless you consider credit default swaps to be art, in which case this is trifling. [WSJ]

You know how two things are funnier than one? Well, two things screwing up simultaneously is even funnier still.

• Actress/TV producer Polly Draper and her husband Michael Wolff, the jazz pianist and composer best known as the bandleader on the Arsenio Hall Show, have put their full-floor apartment at 43 Fifth Avenue on the market. The 13-room, five-bedroom spread is listed for $25 million. [Curbed, AW]
• Texas-based restaurant kingpin Bradley Blum, who's headed up operations at Olive Garden and Burger King and now serves as CEO of Romano's Macaroni Grill, has picked himself up a pied-à-terre. Blum paid $3.7 million for a two-bedroom apartment at the newly-renovated 141 Fifth Avenue. [NYO]
• Paul Greenwood, the former money manager and Islanders co-owner, has put even more property in Westchester up for sale. In addition to the 16-acre estate in North Salem that he listed last month, Greenwood, who was accused of securities fraud last year, is also looking to sell his 300-acre horse farm nearby for $29 million. [NYP, V&W]

The White House Press Pool is getting crazy! This morning, Roll Call was the print outlet scheduled to cover Obama's movements today. But Roll Call was a no-show. And they paid for it.

"Just in time for Fashion Week, a top male model is facing criminal charges after allegedly offering sexual favors to Arkansas cops in return for his release following an arrest for public drunkenness and disorderly conduct." [TSG]

Can you guess what movie this image comes from? Check back for the answer at 4pm today.

• As if Lindsay Lohan didn't have enough problems in her life, it seems she's a "secret hoarder," too. In an interview with the Style Network's Niecy Nash, LiLo's shows all her "stuff," which includes a bedroom filled with shoe boxes and a living room that's been turned into a giant closet. On the plus side, if Sam Ronson ever goes missing, at least the police will know where to start looking. [Us, DM]
• Tiger Woods is supposedly leaving sex rehab in Mississippi by the end of this week, which means he's changed his ways or he's planning on playing in a golf tournament in Arizona in two weeks and he's not going to let his compulsive sexual habits get in the way of that. Elin Nordegren has already flown down to pick him up. Just so there isn't an incident involving a flight attendant in the first-class lounge on the way home. [Radar, NYP]
• Season three of the Real Housewives of New York debuts next month and now word comes that creepy couple Alex McCord and Simon van Kempen may be booted before season four. It's supposedly because "viewers don't have a positive reaction to them" and Simon threw a fit when he found out he wasn't going to be paid as much as the housewives because, well, he's not a housewife, although you're excused if you thought otherwise. [NYDN]
• Precious star—and Academy Award nominee—Gabourey Sidibe would really, really like for Justin Timberlake to be her Oscar date. So, Jessica Biel, if you could step aside and make it happen, that would be great. [People]
• Jon Stewart sat down with Bill O'Reilly last night. Highlights here. [Gawker]