Offensive as always, Daniel Tosh challenged himself to make as many jokes about this viral video of a woman with a gigantic ass. He succeeds in making us laugh with jokes about John Mayer, Kim Kardashian, Sir Mix-a-lot, and fudge.

Stephen Colbert's show persona relishes his ultra-American identity, and the real Colbert has been vocally proud of his Irish Catholic ancestry. On Faces of America, Henry Louis Gates Jr. turned Colbert's world upside-down when he revealed his hidden heritage.

Summit update: Someone's phone went off, and Senator Dodd is doodling.

Assailing PR man/humble website proprietor Dan Abrams, a known bald man with a hair-system of some kind, on last night's Countdown, thick-maned pirate Olbermann employed some very subtle wordplay. He used coded language and punnery to mock Abrams' shameful chromedomedness.

Internet everythings Gabe Delahaye and Max Silvestri have taken it upon themselves to show this year's Oscar hopefuls how it's done, showcasing their emotional range while name-dropping every film up for consideration. Watch yourself, Clooney.

Governor Paterson's few remaining allies are calling on him to not run for reelection. He also just had his first resignation. Update: And now no one knows where he is! Update2: They maybe found him!

For some mysterious reason, Jimmy Kimmel and Tracy Morgan (aka "TrayMo") teamed up last night to rap about C-section scars, OBGYNs, and fertilizing your eggs. Jimmy Kimmel's T-Pain impression: Questionable. TrayMo's lyrics: LEGIT.

Everyone's getting vajazzled! Well, okay, maybe just Jennifer Love Hewitt and some chick who got it done for free and blogged about it. (Slightly NSFW. Also, ew.) But what do dudes think about this latest trend in private part adornment?

This guy was just doing what he had to be doing—working—when he suspects that something is on his roof.

Sure, we tried to protect the children by overlooking the teacher pep rally lap dance scandal that is rocking Winnipeg like a Red River tidal wave. But now a second comical teacher booty grind video has surfaced and, okay, here:

Jason Goldberg didn't have trouble with his bankers back when he was the "Terrible Tyrant" of boring old Jobster. But now that Goldberg's flamboyantly broken free from his buttoned-down, heteronormative look, Citibank's giving his gay lifestyle business a hard time.

The stakes are high as a man runs from the police, but little do they know about his secret weapon: The power to surf cars! Will he surf his way to freedom? Watch and find out.

The geniuses at Everything is Terrible have gone and tracked down a copy of the dreaded late night scourge's 1989 film Collision Course and it is embarrassing. It's mostly one long ching-chong Chinaman (from Japan) joke. Yikes. Poor Pat Morita.

In your niveous Thursday media column: an Atlanta editor is a character, Dave Eggers pontificates, Jann Wenner is a joiner, ProPublica is unstoppable, and a sad poor end to a gay publishing empire.

In celebration of Jay Leno's return to television next week, we thought we'd give you another reason to hate the guy: his performance in 1989's Collision Course. He plays a Detroit cop with a love of cars and racial slurs!

Wendy Williams attempted a long-standing Project Runway tradition: imitating Tim Gunn's distinctive voice, a sartorial siren song. Gunning down the gentlemanly guru's hard-earned status in the fashion community, Williams praised the Kardashians' clothes. Shows what she knows....

Sweet Jesus. See this plexiglass tunnel surrounded by Dubai killer sharks? It sprang a leak and flooded. The shark tunnel flooded. One day after the killer whale killed the Sea World trainer. And the ants escaped. We are outta here.

[Kate Moss (pictured), Naomi Campbell, Daphne Guinness, and Stella McCartney joined McQueen's family for his funeral earlier today at St. Paul's church in London. All were in black, many were in McQueen. A fitting tribute, indeed. Image via Flynet]

If you're not into violence—particularly in the form of drunken bodies of Real World cast-mates falling onto concrete after being rolled off a balcony(!!!)—you may want to skip this clip. To the brave—onward!


[via Inside TV]

Do you know Ina Garten? If not, you should, and the following videos will prove why. Garten hosts Barefoot Contessa, the wildly popular, wildly insane Food Network program, and she's not afraid to let her quirks shine. Inside, a tribute.