I'm bringing back Saturday Night Special one more time. Here's tonight's open thread: I'll be out and about in the comments. J-Lo's on SNL, or something! But first, I need to give some Google Alerts their due diligence.

#NotAfraidToBeCervixey, indeed. First came The Article. Now, here's The Footage. I'm not sure who this woman is, but she might be on the brink of stardom. Because she got her Vagina Vajazzled. For science. Or something. Via Buzzfeed, there's this.

If you wrote a piece for the Huffington Post entitled Do You Really Need an Editor at a Publishing House?, you'd make a strong case, right? The answer, as evidenced by Knopf editor Carole Baron, is a resounding absolutely.

That scary Tsunami that scared me and made CNN's Rick Sanchez freak out? Yup, it's canceled. Also, don't worry, the cast of Lost is going to be okay. Even the fat one. Also, stick around! More fun to come tonight.

Sarah Silverman, brash as always, comes up with a new theory about who killed Jesus.


[via YouTube]

Since this is my last weekend on the site until I return, begging for a job as James Del's assistant, I've invited some friends to jam with me. Joe Coscarelli is a young writer with Things To Say. Joe?

Hellooo! So, the bad news: tonight marks the end of competition for the XXI Winter Olympics. The good news, though, is that it should go out with a bang—the figure skating Champions Gala is tonight! Come in, nerds.

I couldn't abandon ship without saying goodbye to Julia Allison. Her birthday party was last night! And I know, I know: you're so over Julia Allison, Why do you keep posting about her? I'm tired of hearing about her! Etc.

Kreepie Kats, long a staple of this website, died earlier this week at the hands of their creator. They were burned to death. It was bittersweet and gruesome. Creator Jim Behrle was unavailable for comment as a ghastly video surfaced...

Diane Robina, head of programming for TV Guide Network, stopped by the Gawker.TV offices yesterday for a lively chat with our editor-in-chief, Richard Blakeley. Discussed? Non-linear TV watching, programming for Millennials, and Sunday's "25 Biggest TV Blunders" special. Video inside.

Bloggers are now noting CNN's Rick Sanchez, while covering the Chilean earthquake and oncoming tsunami in Hawaii, acted in a manner befitting "an ejaculation that should have been swallowed." If you have video of this, shout. Update! We've got video.

Hey, Gawker! Haven't been around these parts in a while. Nice digs! Actually...nice traffic. Man, last time I posted here I ripped on Remy Stern and something called "Media Bistro." Anyway, young Foster popped over to Deadspin for a second.

Here's a blog strictly of politicians and world leaders appearing to discuss penis size.

So, maybe you heard that Chile is slightly shaken up as of this morning. An 8.8 earthquake some are noting as "100 times more powerful" than Haiti's hit this morning. Damage and deaths are still being assessed. Meanwhile, in Hawaii:

Since this is my last weekend on the site until I return, begging for a job as James Del's assistant, I've invited some friends to play with me. Matt Ealer is the proprietor of Rendit Dot Tumblr Dot Com. Matt?

Time for my first cigarette! Please rock the following jam on repeat until we return in like, ten minutes, which really is probably 30 minutes for you. 2009 had some pretty great #chairdancing songs. This is 2010's first great one.

Tumblr's boy genius founder David Karp (pictured) doesn't just have a blogging platform rife with media people, a nice office, and a big dick*, but he also is way skinny and feels bad about it. He writes:

A woman blisses-out in her villa, searching her closet for the perfect flapper dress (spoiler alert: it's puce!) and ritualizing make-up on a chaise lounge before walking a pack of Borzois into the proverbial sunset.

If you live in New York, you know Central Park is - despite smog-spewing cars blazing through it, kids who shit everywhere, dogs who shit everywhere, tourists who're everywhere, and facepalm-worthy Beatles tributes at Strawberry Fields - pretty magical. But!

Anyone in New York politics who's ever felt like taking a rhetorical piss on David Paterson for their pleasure (and constituents' collective bloodthirst) is seizing the day and whipping it out. For example, enlightened charmer Ruben Diaz went to town!