Dr. Phil finally strangled the caterpillar that has been taking residence above his upper lip for the last forty years. The transition was done on stage at Radio City Music Hall during Oprah's live show in New York City.

Sunday is Mother's Day, guys. Did you forget?? Well don't worry, you still have two more days to get something nice for the lady what made you. Here are our guaranteed-to-please gift ideas.

TONIGHT: The Season 4 premiere of Friday Night Lights has me all atwitter. There might not be anything else to watch and I simply will not care. Clear eyes, full hearts can't lose, people!

Real Housewife Bethenny Frankel reportedly went into labor early this morning. Her baby was due in early June, which is when her new show debuts. Way to ruin all that free publicity by showing up early. Stupid baby.

Some data fiend decided to see how data on drinking habits correlated with all sorts of other fun factors like religion, education and politics. Educated godless liberals with large vocabularies, it seems, enjoy a beverage more than most.

Mavericky ex-Gov. Sarah Palin attended the Time 100 gala earlier this week—thrown by the mainstream media—and tried to justify her bizarre views on the press. She did so in a forthright and, well, utterly confusing and garbled way.

It seems that Faisal Shahzad, the man who tried to detonate a car bomb in Times Square, followed Anwar Al-Awlaki — the radical Islamic cleric who inspired the Fort Hood shooter and the Christmas Day underwear bomber.

Congratulations to corrigenda1 for being the first and only person to answer today's Freeze Frame, it was a really tough one. Click through for the answer.

Thanks to Christian anti-gay activist George Rekers and his Boy Friday, Lucien, everyone is talking about male prostitutes. What should you do if you want to hire a hustler? A handy guide below!

Today marks the second day of Wall Street jitters, with the Dow Jones Industrial Average dropping 350 points this morning before rebounding somewhat this afternoon. It doesn't compare to the freakout that unfolded yesterday, though.

Parks and Recreation did some charitable work last night at Pawnee's all-night telethon for diabetes and discovered that love is like a busy switchboard - some connections are made while others are lost (the beep-beeping of broken hearts).

"Lord Jesus Christ suffers minor injuries in downtown Northampton crosswalk mishap," announces a Massachusetts paper after a car hit a fifty-year-old with the legal named Lord Jesus Christ on the corner of Main St. and Strong Ave.

Are We Winning? is a laugh-out-loud yet ultimately moving love letter to baseball—and to the fathers and sons who share the game—from Will Leitch, one of today's hottest young sports writers.

In a delightful appearance for charity, Will Ferrell showed up at the stadium of the Minor League Round Rock Express as disgraced Venezuelan pitcher Rojo Johnson. He's out of practice, but he definitely brings the gusto.

Scientists were surprised to find that the remnants of neanderthal man live on in more than Geico ads. Between one and four per cent of their genome survives in some individuals, depending on whether their ancestors slept with one. [BBC]

Last night's episode was all about partying and fighting, fighting and partying. It was the most violent episode yet and, sadly, had an actual death toll. Let's remember what happened together, shall we?

Times Square has been evacuated because a "small, white cooler" was left on the sidewalk. So, if you left a cooler in Times Square... go get it. It's the second suspicious-package call of the day. [ABC, photo] Update below.

Since the failed Times Square carbomb, and the arrest of Pakistani suspect Faisal Shahzad, a Pakistani man was ludicrously prevented from buying garden fertilizer. Others, according to Reuters, are now posing as Indians to try and avoid increased stigma.

Getting in shape for any movie is hard. But the preparation for Iron Man 2 undertaken by Gwyneth Paltrow and Robert Downey Jr. was like a NASA experiment. Gwyneth ate only Kale; Robert hit truck tires with a sledgehammer.

This will be possible! The Vice co-founder has sold a collection of stories to Scribner, which he describes as "a big pile of bar stories." Marketing the book will involve making sure you can never find it anywhere, ever. [Observer]