A Google-connected startup misdirected up to 96 genetic-test results, telling people their children were not their children, that their ancestors were not their ancestors and even that they were a different gender. Then came the panic and tears.

Joe Lieberman loves publicly agonizing over which candidate to support for Connecticut's other Senate seat. What about Republican Linda McMahon's trashy history in pro-wrestling? "I'm not gonna hold her accountable for anything she did in the past." Huh?

The hosts have mixed reactions to a trend in China of dyeing dogs to look like other animals. Most seemed both amused and confused, but all Ann Curry wants to know is what happens when the roots start to show?

In your standoffish Tuesday media column: Robert Thomson is talking trash nonstop, Michael Isikoff's liberal bias exposed, CNN is giving up on news, Good Morning America goes into the magic business, and shameless Onion regurgitation of the day.

If there's one thing Whoopi Goldberg doesn't want, it's someone messing with her shrimp. Or so she said today on The View, during an angry tirade against BP for its perpetual failure to stop the Gulf oil leak. Video inside.

Heyyyy science!! We are just facting up a storm today. First it was totally gay jungle cats, and now it's a study that proves that gay dudes are skinnier than straight ones. And lesbians? Well, they're heftier than straight girls.

While MTV encouraged its celebrity guests to swear up a storm on stage, it was clear that the censor guys behind the scenes weren't as ready to bleep. Mediaite put together all of swears that made it on the air.

We were far too busy watching the season finale of Nurse Jackie to attend the Council of Fashion Designers of America Awards last night at Lincoln Center. But fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern was there taking plenty of notes!

Last night on True Beauty, Penn & Teller judged the contestants on their magic trick skills, and their ability to keep a secret. But the magicians seemed far more interested in external assets rather than internal qualities.

Vogue editor Sally Singer is the new editor of the New York Times' T Magazine.

Debrahlee Lorenzana is about to cause a second financial crisis with her hotness: Allegedly fired from Citibank for being too hot, Debrahlee says new employer Chase may fire her, too, if she "keeps talking." If that happens, customers will rebel.

Yesterday, we asked you, the economically astute people slacking off at work, how Britain could save some money, lest it be mired in pauperdom for "generations." We've culled hundreds of comments into five ideas that could work. Pay attention, Brits.

According to Rosanna Scotto and Security Specialist Robert Strang, you might become a terrorist if you were a "loser" in high school. So watch who you bully—they might become rich, famous, or a terrorist in the future!

The release of those comical pictures of White House reporters having Super Soaker fights with White House employees at Joe Biden's mansion this past weekend has launched a raging ethical debate.

Because "everyone knows it's the President's job to appear angry—otherwise we don't know what we feel," Stephen Colbert decided that it was up to him to show Barack Obama how to appear ready to kick some BP ass.

These hunks relabel the men's locker room as the women's. Then they undress and wait for the unsuspecting women to enter.

Important scientists have long been spraying perfume and cologne on rocks and trees at zoos to interest big cats. In their time they've discovered that Calvin Klein's Obsession for Men gets the creatures the most interested. No one knows why.

In the futuristic year of Twenty Aught Ten, what is it that high school students want? Haunting new evidence confirms: they want to tap that.

Everyone loves free swag—and 2010 Webutante Ball Prom Committee member Arthur Kade is no different. Here, he explores what's inside his exclusive Webutante Ball Prom Committee gift bag and takes us along for the ride.

Michael Lohan, a person talented and accomplished enough to have had a daughter who was famous for a while five years ago, is opening up a nightclub in the Hamptons called, pathetically, Controversy. Don't worry! They'll screen for drugs there.