After LeBron pissed on NY sportswriters' sense of entitlement, the backlash has begun.

Who: The extremely cloying and incredibly pretentious lit star is best known as the author of 2002's Everything is Illuminated. He's also the husband of author Nicole Krauss.

Apparently upset about the price of a pair of shades in a Chelsea boutique, a man yesterday brandished a knife and stabbed the store manager. He stabbed more people outside before being subdued by a Salsa DJ and his crew.

The 43-year-old Iranian woman who was convicted of having an "illicit relationship" outside her marriage, Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani, will not be stoned to death, according to authorities there. They did not say whether the death sentence had been lifted.

[The solar-powered HB-SIA prototype airplane after its first night flight attempt in Switzerland. The experimental plane landed safely after completing its first 24-hour test flight. Pic via AP.]

Looks like our Russian spies are going back home as part of a prisoner exchange. Too bad! They seemed so fun! But why are we trading them for Western spies, when Russia has so much more to offer?

What would you name a dinosaur species, if you'd had a couple drinks? Probably something like "Buttheadsaurus" or "Danielle Staub Rex" or "Walter." These paleontologists, meeting over beer, decided to name their find "Mojoceratops." I like "Walter" more. [MSNBC]

Fifty people have been arrested in Oakland in protests following the involuntary manslaughter verdict for BART cop Johannes Mehserle, according to Oakland police. Hopefully OPD can tell the difference between their tasers and their guns. [Pic via ABC7]

A new NSA surveillance program (contracted to Raytheon) will monitor for cyber-attacks on critical infrastructure. Sounds okay, right? So why is it called "Perfect Citizen"? And why did Raytheon send an email reading "Perfect Citizen is Big Brother"?

Federal district court judge Joseph Tauro struck down the Defense of Marriage Act on Thursday as unconstitutional. The Justice Department might appeal, but till then you can gay marry all you want and the feds can't touch you. [Boston Globe]

Tonight on Bethenny Getting Married, Bethenny... got married! But there were some hiccups. Namely, Bethenny decided that she had to go to the bathroom—at the last minute/while in her wedding dress—and opted for a trash can. Video inside.

LeBron James announced on ESPN tonight that he's joining the Miami Heat this fall. Some people really care about this, and they filmed their reactions for all of the Internet to enjoy.

If you happened to turn the channel to CBS around 8:20pm tonight you may have seen thirteen grown men and women in bike shorts zip-lining across their backyard on giant, slippery hot dogs. That's right. Big Brother is back.

Freakishly good ballet dancer (and judges' favorite) Alex Wong was sent home tonight on SYTYCD thanks to an equally freakish injury that's going to leave him recovering for three months. Naturally, plenty of tears and words of inspiration followed.

Tonight's Futurama provided us with a hopeful look into the future of Gay/Robosexual/Horse-and-Ghost Marriage, although there are still haters. It's good to have Bender on the side of equality.

Tonight, Jon Stewart executed an [adjective meaning brilliant/funny] opening segment about Arizona's immigration bill. In it, Stewart threw a right hook at John McCain, a left hook at Fox News, and delivered a knockout against the bill itself. Video inside.

[Real Housewife of New York Bethenny Frankel, during an appearance on CBS' Early Show. Photo via Pacific Coast News]

Once in a while—remember this?—a music video that naturally lends itself to parody is released. The most recent one is Katy Perry's "California Gurls," and—in the parody war—there are two contenders: gays and grandpas. Inside, video of both.

Certain talkshows and Internet commenters are practically race-rioting over Obama's new 10% tax on tanning salons. See, only white people tan—which means the tax will only be paid by white people. Reverse racist tax!

Perez Hilton claims this song, entitled "Too Young to Die," is a leaked Lindsay Lohan track: "Crashing my car coming flying through the windshield... I'm oh I'm too young die." Where did this stunning display of tone-deafness come from?