Ladies and dudes alike are going crazy over sexy not-gay politician Aaron Schock. And we've covered the Republican congressman extensively due to his hotness, thus supporting science's new theory that hottie politicians get more media coverage.

Steve Carell and Jane Lynch, who are apparently friends and that is awesome, were both guests on The Tonight Show last night, where they reminisced on the latino folk songs Jane used to serenade Steve with.

Supreme Court justice Clarence Thomas and family are "outraged" after his nephew was allegedly punched, pulled and tased at a New Orleans hospital, after a possible suicide attempt. The taser put him into a "massive epileptic seizure." Video below.

Political writers across the mid-Atlantic watched LeBron James' incredibly shameless decision last night, searching for a "political angle." Hats off to the Atlantic's Josh Green, who wrote a savvy thing called, "How LeBron's Move Helps the Tea Party." Snappy! (Huh?)

The United Arab Emirates' top religious authority has issued a fatwa against those annoying plastic horns everyone blows at the World Cup, citing possible hearing damage. Praise Allah. Is it grammatically correct to say something has been "fatwaed?" [AP]

OMG you guys, the soaps are so hip these days! Observe as these pretty young things on All My Children name drop metalelectronicacore band Genghis Tron as well as music venues The Mercury Lounge and The Knitting Factory.

Since there aren't any more Snuggie jokes to be made, Americans have moved on to ironically loving a new ridiculous product: the TV Hat. Can we all agree to stop wasting our money on this crap?

It's no secret that Jason Segel is on a rabid press tour for Despicable Me. He was interviewed by a little kid and married a couple on the Tonight Show—but we think he saved the best for last.

Kristin Cavallari of "The Hills" dropped by Chelsea Lately last night, and the pair gabbed about being bitches and the mysteries of Brody Jenner. Is it just us, or does it look like Kristin is trying to become Chelsea's doppelganger?

Bruno Souza, a popular goalie, has been arrested, along with his wife and several friends, for murdering his 25-year-old mistress, chopping her up, and feeding the pieces to dogs. He says he will "laugh at all this" later. [via, Image:AP]

More details are emerging about the case of Wikileaker Pvt. Bradley Manning and they are… Gagalicious. Manning's plan to download and leak thousands of classified documents to Wikileaks hinged on lip-syncing to "Telephone".

Behold, the blurb that launched a thousand mocking blog posts: "Very rarely, a few times in a lifetime, you open a book and when you close it nothing can ever be the same..." Book blurbs: Old media's version of linkbaiting.

If you missed the Community marathon that NBC aired last night, we've totally got you covered. The bad news? The hilarious duo failed to get a laugh out of us in these cheesy, laugh-track-filled spots.

[Meredith Vieira pays tribute to Lady Gaga's smoking sunglasses during Gaga's Today Show performance at NBC Studios. Image via INF.]

Daily Profile: Jonathan Safran Foer

Democrats are going to lose pretty badly in November. Because it's four months away, and the unemployment rate is 10 percent. It's that simple. And as a new poll shows, they're losing the message battle in some horrible ways.

A disinterested Lamar Odom and unusually subdued Khloe discuss the Kardashian family bond and their lack of a honeymoon. If these two last at least another year, we think anybody can make it.

Gawker.TV Trivia, a daily question & answer game that tests your knowledge of television—past and present. Do you think you that you've got it? The answer to today's question, inside.

Ticket sales for all the concerts in the country combined has dropped to a new low, and many big-name acts are under-performing. How could this happen? Maybe because all the bands are old and no one wants to see them.

Here's a trailer for Jack Goes Boating, Phillip Seymour Hoffman's directorial debut, based on the Off-Broadway play he starred in a few years ago. It could also be called Sad, Lost Losers In Love.