A Florida man broke into a church to steal its donations. But the box was locked and since he didn't have a crowbar, he was forced to improvise: He used the crucifix. Does that mean God was on his side?

TONIGHT: We've got new episodes of Big Brother 12, So You Think You Can Dance, Top Chef, America's Got Talent, The Real World, Work of Art and much, much more. Plus, Steve Carell on Fallon and Bill Murray on Letterman!

In honor of what will mercifully be the end of Blago's corruption trial, Shepard Smith donned his finest cape and berated the disgraced governor for not testifying at his corruption trial. Is Shep Smith secretly Dracula?

The Administration has begun its grueling cleanup process after the hasty firing of USDA official Shirley Sherrod, following Andrew Breitbart's latest idiot nonsense. At today's White House press conference, press secretary Robert Gibbs apologized on behalf of the administration.

WSJ reporter Douglas Belkin was arrested while covering the Blagojevich trial today. Don't touch security!

About half of the people in a recent survey said the schmaltzy happy endings of chick flicks have ruined their idea of a perfect relationship. Remember this when you have to weasel out of seeing a shitty Katherine Heigl movie.

CNN, the network that brought us the hologram interview, once again innovated news today. Shirley Sherrod, the woman wrongly accused of discriminatory behavior and fired by the USDA, was brought in to watch Robert Gibbs's press conference on the topic.

After getting a ton of bad publicity for canceling Fresh Air last week, Mississippi Public Broadcasting follows it up today by firing a reporter who leaked a memo about the show's cancellation. The journalism instinct, it's strong there. [via Romenesko]

Today at Gawker.TV, Jon Hamm teases the new season of Mad Men with a new clip, Mark Wahlberg is a total douche, Flight of the Conchords' Jemaine Clement, and Steve Carell exposes his past life as a colonial fifer.

Congratulations to Lazarou for being the first person to answer today's Freeze Frame. Click through for the answer.

Michael Waldron was born with a congenital malformation that left him without four fingers on his right hand. Struggling to fit in—and function—his entire life, 18-year-old Waldron found new hope with a brand new bionic hand. Video inside.

Her powers are getting stronger by the day! Also today: a very interesting expose about the behind-the-scenes goings on of Chuck, Sam Raimi makes a bad choice, Sharon Stone is old, and George Clooney is a hero.

Michigan congressional candidate Bill Cooper is serious about deficits. Riffing on the legendary 1964 LBJ scare ad, "Daisy," Cooper promises to repel nuclear weapons of debt headed directly at children. What about real nuclear weapons, though? Will he repel those?

The Way We Live Now: with uncertainty. The only thing we know is that we don't know what we may or may not know. Who knows? Maybe this thing will blow over. In the meantime, you're fired. (And evicted).

Pennsylvania's Department of Labor ruled today that even though children under seven aren't usually allowed to work on TV shows, Kate Gosselin's six-year-old sextuplets are not being "unlawfully exploited." Sadly, there's no board to determine if they're being "morally exploited."

Is your child hungry? Like, really hungry? The most caloric kids meal in America is reportedly Friendly's Mac & Cheese Quesadilla. With the drink and dessert that come with it, the meal has 2,300 calories.

Meet Autom, a new robot who promises to kick start your quest for a healthier body. She'll cost $500, so it might just be easier and cheaper to get a friend to nag you for free.

All that drama from screwing a bunch of hoochies only cost Tiger Woods $10 million, apparently. He's still atop Sports Illustrated's list of highest-paid athletes, having raked in $90 million last year. Elin must be thrilled to hear that, no?

Minnesota's greatest, Michele Bachmann, and several other patriotic congressmen held a presser today announcing the launch of the House Tea Party Caucus! Her office also released a list of inaugural members — some of whom didn't know they'd signed up.

[Justin Timberlake and his beautiful magician's assistant Evelina Pereira film Gawker's new favorite movie (sorry, "Something Borrowed"), "Friends With Benefits", in Central Park today. Image: INF]