It's only Monday, but Senate Republicans have already found a new part of the Constitution they want to amend. Sen. Jim DeMint and others plan to introduce a balanced budget amendment in September, just to wow their base before November.

Everyone thinks that fast food joints and chain restaurants in New York must be disgusting while five-star eateries are as spotless as their white tablecloths. New York City's Department of Healthy has found the exact opposite to be true.

Rock star adman Alex Bogusky abruptly retired from advertising this summer, saying he wanted to pursue other, more righteous initiatives. Has Burger King's greatest pitchman really had a change of heart? Or is his narcissistic personality disorder acting up again?

Shepard Smith spoke about the menu at the new Pop Tarts Cafe that opened today in Times Square. He turned his nose up at the various diabetes inducing concoctions that will be gleefully vacuumed into the mouths of fatty tourists.

TONIGHT: Lots of TV! We've got the Teen Choice Awards, the series premiere of Bachelor Pad, the season premiere of Dating in the Dark, the season finale of Last Comic Standing, a new Real Housewives of New Jersey, and more!

Aviarios Del Caribe in Costa Rica is the only established orphanage for sloths. Although we previously got a brief look at the sloths, this more in depth video will send your heart over the edge.

Today at Gawker.TV, the Kids in the Hall warn us of the dangers of child pageantry, Jason Bateman talks about the time he kissed Dustin Hoffman, and a Today Show anchor reports the weather while stuck inside of an elevator.

Congratulations to GitEmSteveDave for being the first person to answer today's Freeze Frame. Click through for the answer.

Captain Steve may have saved these peoples' lives but don't expect him to become an overnight American hero. He did manage to kill our threatened national symbol in the process. Captain Sully is not impressed.

She's shameless!! Also today: Keep Marcia Gay Harden away from your kids, some great news about the death of an HBO show, and news of man of the moment Will Ferrell.

The Way We Live Now: in enslavement to repayment. Our salvation? Reparations. Or—damn it—at least a sandwich.

On last night's Hung, Tanya attended her mother's birthday dinner and did/said something we would all love to do when our parents become a little overbearing. Make it rain Tanya, make it rain.

Coming this fall to a Cartoon Network near you, The Looney Tunes Show! Yes, brand new episodes of our favorite nature dwellers in 'toon form will grace the small screen once again with famous voice actor, Jeff Bergman, taking on Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck for the first time in nearly a decade.

Mel isn't the only ranting Gibson. His Holocaust-denying father Hutton—who belongs to a fringe Catholic group—recently went on a radio rant, calling Pope Benedict "homosexual" and half the Vatican "queer." Hutton's so far right, he's almost a leftist.

Are you ready to feel old? Thomas Lennon, of The State and Reno 911 fame, turns 40 today. In this clip, Tom is serenaded by his very Weird BFF and a gaggle of rambunctious Canadians.

As the Battle of the Cheetos moves into its sixth week, there is no end in site. Every day, more armies are created, and more battles are waged. With every passing moment, new battalions take command of websites while others are overthrown. Will you be victorious, or just another name in the long line of the defeated?

Do a million great ads offset a crappy product? Not quite.

There's a melodramatic "war" brewing between Facebook and Google, and Facebook's CEO is seizing the opportunity to squeeze more work from his engineers, declaring a "lockdown," keeping the office open on weekends, and putting a neon sign on his door.

On the season finale of Friday Night Lights, Coach Taylor and his family host Thanksgiving dinner the night before the big rivalry game. As is the case with any family get-together, nobody looks too thrilled to be there.

Like me, you've probably always wondered what it'd look like for a sign language interpreter to perform lyrics like, "My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely lady lumps," at a Black Eyed Peas concert. Here's your answer.