Losing California gubernatorial candidate Meg Whitman will pay back wages to her former housekeeper. Guess she had some money left over.

Musician Patti Smith won the nonfiction National Book Award on Wednesday for her memoir Just Kids, while Jaimy Gordon's Lord of Misrule came out of nowhere (well, Kingston, N.Y.) to win the fiction prize. Everyone was very surprised! And drunk.

Good news, everyone! Sarah Palin is "seriously considering" running for president in 2012. Don't be nervous for her, though—she believes she can beat President Obama.

The Arnolds are having a baby. Unless the public votes to have the child aborted. Meet the couple behind Birthornot.com, where "you can vote and choose whether we abort or keep our unborn child."

In order to create a grandiose multi-course tasting menu for the finale, Just Desserts enlisted the help of famous pastry chefs. In this clip, watch Morgan piss off his sous chef, Claudia Fleming, and other chefs one last time.

Click to viewAdmit it: You've always wanted to hear the Harry Potter kids say "mozzarella sticks" in an American accent. And now you can, thanks to this MTV video! (Recommended: Watch Emma Watson's face as she says "Olive Garden.") [via Vulture]

Manbird, the most difficult and least popular language on Earth, has over 500 variations of one particularly offensive phrase. It takes a firm grasp of deep throat resonance to get all the nuances just right. Lesson number one inside.

Amazon is launching Amazon Studios, a website that they are hoping will turn into a viable production label for producing feature films. Whose movies are they going to make? Yours! Well, maybe.

In a paper today, scientists from Switzerland's CERN lab reveal they created and trapped a form of antimatter for the first time ever. There's no practical use for this except, you know, figuring out why the universe exists.

On this week's episode of Modern Family, everyone struggles to get to Manny's birthday. First up: Gloria must wield a (b.b.) gun to get Frank and Manny moving.

A Miami doctor is suing Hillstone Restaurant Group, parent of the Houston's chain, after a bad experience with an artichoke. Apparently Arturo Carvajal ordered the off-menu special of "Grilled Artichokes." Then he ate the entire thing, leaves and all.

Being Shannon the Cannon in grade school was not magnificent. But in this clip where Jenks tries stand-up following his comedian subject Dan St. Germain (whose divorced dad dancing joke is a win), he reveals an even sadder moniker.

West Virginia Senator Jay Rockefeller wants both MSNBC and Fox to disappear. Has he ever watched CNN?

Nutria are really nasty creatures, like a mutant gerbil crossed with a subway rat. So it was only a matter of time before nutria fur became a fashion trend. But did you know it's the most "guilt-free" of all fur?

The Air Force recently warned troops about the "devastating operations security and privacy implications" of location-based social networking services like Facebook Places and Foursquare. In other words: Don't check into your spy plane as it cruises over China. (Image via)

What could be cuter than three cozy kittens all taking a nap together? OMG! a secret, even cuter kitten hidden underneath all of them!

[A leaf blower clears off the plaza in front of the U.S. Capitol, where new members of Congress are in the middle of freshman orientation. Image via Getty]

This "fluid dress" made out of knitted tubing that has black light reactive chemicals flowing through it is something that must be seen to be believed.

If you were only inches away from a wide open soccer goal, do you think think you could kick the ball in? This guy thought so too.

As people who are obsessed with television, you have probably noticed the decline of the soap opera, and if you are like Chelsea Handler, this is very upsetting for you. Watch Handler remind us why they really are so amazing.