Kentuckian Mark Cothren shot this hairless animal earlier in the week because he "feared what it was, since he did not recognize it." Mark! It's definitely a chupacabra. You know, a goat-sucker? They have them in Texas now, too.

Scientists have discovered bits of cooked plants in the teeth of Neanderthals, contradicting the conventional wisdom that they only ate meat, and proving that the hominids hadn't yet developed sophisticated toothpick technology.

Norm MacDonald finds that we accept things at a restaurant that we wouldn't quite do at home, like getting excited about bread before a meal. Plus, when did ordering desserts get so complicated?

Floridian Lawrence Gauthier, who's called 911 16 times since November to "request business cards," called the emergency hotline on Sunday and "told the dispatcher he wanted the media arrested." Which is totally frivolous! But, yes, please, arrest those bastards. [via]

This June, TNT will begin airing Falling Skies, an alien invasion series starring Noah Wyle and produced by Stephen Spielberg. It seems like a gritty tale of survival, though it could just as easily be a total cheesefest. Who knows.

[Sure, some people were trapped inside, stranded at the airport, or forced to shovel, but others still managed to have some fun in Central Park with all the fresh snow. Image via Getty]

Lets all take a moment to remember all of the most popular songs of 2010 that we'll all be ironically dancing to in five years. Happy almost New Years everyone!

Here's some amateur video that was taken today in New York City's Brooklyn Heights neighborhood. Watch as sanitation workers attempt to free a snowbound front loader—and destroy a nearby Ford Explorer in the process. 2010's blizzard claims another!

What do little kids see when they look through viewfinders? Stocky Canadian gudios promising that they are going to make them come tonight... over to their house of course!

Today we checked out the swanky new stucco digs — fresh out of the foreclosure mill — that college-bound Bristol Palin bought in Maricopa, Arizona. Our Arizona real estate experts then weighed in: Is Maricopa a "good" place to settle?

I'm torn on this new teaser for season three of Toddlers & Tiaras, which announces the return of Makenzie, a "diva" who is wonderful (and horrifying) television. Here, she is weirded out by doing her nails on "that show." Sadface?

Where has the honorable Governor Sandwiches of New Jersey, Chris Christie, been during this snowpocalypse? In Disney World, eating sandwiches. And the lieutenant governor literally fled to Mexico! So a Democratic acting governor is running things, and probably raising taxes.

John Warhola, Andy Warhol's older brother, died on Christmas Eve at the age of 85.

"Because he sings horrible." Would you take a look at that, America? We have a non-conformist on our hands. It's the best present she can give her family: not liking Justin Bieber.

The meaning of grades, explained! Hurdles, hurdled! Teachers, sexxxily harassed! Science fairs, endangered! Manga, fake classes held! Science, professionalized! Books, criticized! Data, supersized and atomized! It's your Monday Education Watch, where we watch education—because it's a free country!

Outsize fashion personality Karl Lagerfeld is currently starring in a commercial for special editions of Volkswagen's Polo and Golf models. Please, Uncle Karl knows nothing of playing golf or polo shirts. Just look at him!

TONIGHT: Not much going on, but we've still got new episodes of the Closer and Men of a Certain Age and a big NFC South battle on Monday Night Football. Plus, something called the American Chocolate Championship which sounds incredible.

[Famous rappers cannot resist the obligatory "shoveling snow" picture that your dad takes every year. 50 Cent tweets, "I want a hundred dollars per house. I bet anybody ill make a grand moving snow today. Lol." Via @50Cent]

We approach this cat lounging, window-side, on it's chair. The cat somehow takes this as a cue to put on the rabbit costume / hat that has been designated to him. Ta-da! He hates us all.

McDonald's is "running ads to remind customers that it still sells Big Macs and Quarter Pounders." In case you forgot.