Wal-Mart, unsated by every last drop of Middle America's lifeblood, plans to break into the NYC market, whether we like it or not. Today, the company rolls out its all-powerful propaganda tool: a website! Bow before its persuasive powers!

An obviously deranged man killed six people with a legally purchased and legally carried pistol on Saturday, and the only thing we're arguing about is whether he was listening to Sarah Palin.

Laura Prepon (from That 70's Show fame) has always wanted to direct, so she took up guerrilla film-making and created a Web Series called Neighbros. Inside, one of our favorite episodes (which feature Greek's Scott Michael Foster.)

Former GOP House Majority Leader Tom Delay has been sentenced to three years in jail for money laundering and conspiracy.

Larry Page just bought a $45 million, 193-foot, helicopter-ready superyacht from a New Zealand businessman. Apparently the Google co-founder and recent father wasn't content with his jetliners and fighter plane. Pics of the yacht below.

Oh dear. Mattel has gone and made a doll-promoting product-placement reality series called Genuine Ken: The Search for the Great American Boyfriend, hosted by Whitney Port. They've rolled out a preview clip and a fascinating website introducing the boytestants.

Who is this anonymous author, with "vast" White House insider knowledge, behind the upcoming O: A Presidential Novel? Publisher Simon & Schuster released more information today! But now it seems more like a hoax.

Take one horse and buggy, one rope, one pair of skis, and one incredibly eager Amish person, and what do you have? Amish skiing, y'all. Inside, see the most fun this guy's had, well, probably ever. Who needs electricity, anyway!

We've all seen a dirty car that said "Wash Me" on the back, but some pranksters in New York City took it a step further. Oh, to be literate and delinquent at the same time!

The Great Migration of black Americans from South to North is reversing itself.

At the end of last night's Family Guy, we're treated to an unusual appearance by "President Obama." He comes out in an Elvis-like suit, singing "You Gotta Be Sincere" to a screaming audience of adoring females.

Meet Tucker! Tucker is a Schnoodle and one-and-a-half years old. In this video, Tucker jumps up onto his owners' piano bench, plays a few notes, and sings along. Why does he sound so... tortured, though? Is Tucker depressed? Watch inside.

There's a new member of Fox's Sunday night comedy block. Bob's Burgers premiered after The Simpsons last night to mixed reviews. Mainly, it left us wondering how a cast filled with such funny people be so ...unfunny? We investigate!

In your wary Monday media column: Newsweek has a "sweeping redesign" coming, Ed Rendell vs. 60 Minutes, Piers Morgan will have at least one good week, post-"Giffords Dies" soul searching, and The Daily is nearly here.

Matt Le Blanc is back and he's playing himself on the new Showtime series Episodes. Is this show, about a British show being adapted for American TV, worth getting excited over?

After a demo version leaked last week, Britney Spears' dry-humping anthem "Hold It Against Me" is officially out.

It started with Pajama Jeans, the eye-searing fashion hybrid that's taken over our TVs. Now comes Jumpin' Jammer'z. Yes, they're footie pajamas for adults. Listen up, people: It's time to put down the sleepwear and start wearing real clothes again.

Steve was just cruising down the road in his skyjack, having a beer. Naturally he plays a game of "Maybe I'll come down...MAYBE I WON'T" with the cop that pulls him over.

The big MySpace layoffs are reportedly happening tomorrow and 550+ employees may be affected. That's like half their users!

[Members of Congress, their staffs and others gather on the steps outside the House of Representatives during this morning's national moment of silence for the Tucson shooting spree victims. Photo via Getty.]