CNN anchor Don Lemon has a new memoir out. In it, he admits that he is gay—something that was widely known within the news industry already. Let's parse this quote that Don gives to the NYT:

With the stroke of a single attempted rape charge, IMF chief and French political bigwig Dominique Strauss-Kahn has successfully pushed Osama bin Laden out of the top spot in the world's news holes, after more than a week. Here's the very latest morning updates on Strauss-Kahn, a.k.a. "the great seducer."

Stephen Hawking says: "I regard the brain as a computer which will stop working when its components fail. There is no heaven or afterlife for broken down computers; that is a fairy story for people afraid of the dark." Ooooh.

In a landslide vote yesterday, the Swiss decided to keep in place a 1941 law that allows assisted suicide, as well "suicide tourism" for foreigners. Conservatives and evangelical religious figures in the country tried to have the practice banned through a referendum. Liberal and even some right wing parties opposed the ban.

Did you know that it's a crime to "noodle" a catfish in Texas? Oh, you don't know about noodlin'? Also called "hogging" or "grabbing," it's when you reach your hand into an underwater hole, jam your fist into a catfish's throat, pull the sombitch out of the water and then do whatever it is you do after catching a fish with your bare hands. The crime is currently a misdemeanor in Texas, and could come with as much as a $500 fine. But that could soon change.

The Post reports that the Port Authority Bus Terminal is swarming with "hucksters" who help travelers to their gates and then ask for a "$2 to $3 tip." Whoa. Next they'll say bus stations smell like urine or something.

Two mayors in Massachusetts are livid over brownies called Lazy Cakes, that contain 8mg of sleep aid melatonin, saying the cartoon on the package is a scheme to attract children. The mayors of Fall River and New Bedford now want them banned. One doctor called the Lazy Cakes marketing scheme "heinous," while one mayor called it "despicable." So much anger, man. But the company told the Boston Herald that Lazy Larry, the budget brownie version of Sponge Bob, isn't meant to attract kids at all:

The head of the International Monetary Fund, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, arrested yesterday in New York for alleged sexual assault on a hotel maid, is also known to many as "the great seducer," for his "reputation with women" as the AP points out. The guy is 62 years old. That's gross.

An influential former supporter of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Ayatollah Mohammad Taghi Mesbah Yazdi, told the Iranian magazine Shoma that the president has been acting "unnaturally" due to a spell that was cast by his main adviser, Esfandiar Rahim Mashaei.

The body of Jerry William McDonald, a 68-year-old man from Oregon, was discovered by Forest Service rangers on Thursday, tucked inside a sleeping bag in his truck. With him was the homemade calendar on which he chronicled his activities for the nearly 70 days he survived after a heavy snowstorm on Valentine's Day trapped his vehicle just four miles from the nearest town.

It pretty much goes without saying that Renee Graziano is the star of Mob Wives—I mean, come on, she followed up one bar fight with a second bar fight—so naturally, the highlight of tonight's episode features her. Is it just me, or is there something different about her face?

Yesterday, we brought you the very worst (and therefore the best) offering from the 2011 Eurovision contest: Moldova's entry "So Lucky," which wasn't so much a catchy pop song as it was a command performance by the Satan-worshipping garden gnomes living inside David Lynch's small intestine. Today, we bring you the very best (and therefore the very worst) that this surreal music competition has to offer. It's this year's winner, "Running Scared," from dark horse competitor Azerbaijan. If you can make it past the two-minute mark, you're rewarded with cascades of hellfire.

A half-billion people on the planet, or 1 in 10, are obese, and despite Beyoncé's best efforts, that number is growing. Many of them will go on to develop obesity-linked illnesses, like heart disease and diabetes. But the dotted line between the two has never been fully understood — until now. Scientists in England have isolated the gene that acts as the body's "master switch."

Here's one of the scattered pictures of the smiles Arnold Scharzenegger and Maria Shriver are in the process of leaving behind. It was sent to us by photographer Brad Elterman, who snapped the couple back in 1977 at a Las Vegas charity softball tournament hosted by Kenny Rogers. As Elterman recalls, "He was totally cool and loved the attention of my camera, but Maria made a hissy fit about having her photo taken."

A veterinarian in Grand Rapids is offering a $500 reward for anyone who knows who shot his new friend, Bow the Cat, with a bow and arrow. A what? Yep—as it turns out, this sort of awful thing happens fairly often.

Remember Erik Prince, the creepy former CEO of mercenary firm Blackwater (now called Xe), who fled the United States for the United Arab Emirates after selling his company? What's that zany dude up to now? Oh, just forming a mercenary army at the behest of the United Arab Emirates' autocratic crown prince, with the tacit approval of the U.S. government.

If you think America's criminal justice system for humans is bad, the system set up for sea lions is even worse. For sea lions, just eating too much can earn you the death penalty.

Here in New York City, we are awed and frightened by hailstorms, which seem to us as eclipses must have once seemed to premodern humanity. In Indiana, one-and-a-half-inch hail just means you have to put your t-shirt over your head while you mow your lawn, as this gentleman demonstrates.[via I Heart Chaos]

After the online vigilante group Anonymous attacked his websites last October, KISS bassist Gene Simmons promised to hunt the perpetrators down and "sue their pants off." In an interview this week he struck a much softer tone.

All around the world people have started planking—lying face-down, stiff, and expressionless across cheerleaders, their pet camels, and other weird and dangerous places, then posting pics of their stunts online. It's pretty fun, when nothing terrible and tragic happens.