The prototype is incubating, but still under wraps. A recent picture of Larry Page's wife reveals that the Google CEO is expecting a second child. Just don't expect Page, the taciturn computer scientist, to reveal much about the baby.
Florida Gov. Rick Scott is terribly unpopular in his state after turning down billions in federal transportation dollars, requiring public employees to take drug tests at the drug-testing company he founded, being an asshole, and so on. How will he ever get his approval ratings out of the 20s? He won't do a thing. You, however, will send pre-written letters to the editors of seven Florida newspapers, and you will do it right now.
In your musty Monday media column: paywalls infest the iPad, The Onion wants a Pulitzer, Ed Henry goes to Fox News, Spin magazine fires its editor, mommy bloggers get their own talent agency, and reporters are harassed in Egypt.
Last night's episode of A Tan Too Far was all about the sibling feud that is shaping this entire season. So finally we tapped into the juice! The Giuce! Still, though, nothing really happened.
This morning, the anchors of the Early Show were caught off guard when the show accidentally cut to two men doing something.
Former ambassador to China and Utah governor Jon Huntsman Jr. is gearing up to run for president! That single human being in Iowa, at least, is pleased as punch. What do we know about this blossoming mute? According to this ad, he's the "candidate for president who rides motocross to relax." Nifty! That Oval Office fridge better be stocked like the dickens with Mountain Dew Code Red.
Last night both HBO's Game of Thrones and The Killing had their season finales. One was brilliant and the other a huge letdown. Here is what Thrones did to kill The Killing.
Arizona has been having some troubles again, this time with massive wildfires torching the already barren hellscape. You know why? Because it's a desert. All you need is, say, a golf club nicking a rock, or some other painfully simple action, and boom: death flames everywhere. Or you can just blame the illegal immigrants in their pyromanic fly-by-night encampments, as Sen. John McCain has.
Canada's answer to a question nobody asked has rolled out his big superhero picture and it's not quite a hit. Meanwhile, another Canadian, name of Jim Carrey, isn't faring so well either.
The Supreme Court has just ruled that what would have been the largest sex discrimination suit in history—more than a million women suing Wal-Mart—cannot proceed as a class action suit. The women are all free to sue the company separately, but the mega-humongo class action suit would have been a serious financial threat to the company, while various isolated lawsuits will not be.
Gwyneth Paltrow gets pulled over by the NYPD. Heidi Montag works out 14 hours a day and has "shooting pains" in her breasts. Beyonce's mother is a diva. A new Miss USA is crowned. Monday gossip fought the law.
Not even Viagra will help this actor's serious case of whiskey dick. This actress got pregnant with her best friend's boyfriend's baby. And this actress is trying to convince the press she's dating a man everyone knows is a closet case. The only secrets anyone ever has are in the bedroom.
Patriotic Americans everywhere rushed home from church yesterday afternoon in order to tune into the "U.S. Open" golf tournament, knowing that god, in his infinite beneficence, would understand that enthusiasm for the "U.S. Open" is part and parcel of doing His work. Imagine their shock, then, when the NBC broadcasting network failed to include the words "under god" in their introductory segment for the "U.S. Open"—which, naturally, was a sickeningly sweet montage of pseudo-patriotic images up to and including American soldiers toting around carefully folded U.S. flags, as schoolchildren reverently recited the Pledge of Allegiance. Sickeningly patriotic, yes; but not sickeningly religious. To recap: Innocent, golf-loving American children were subjected, against their will, to a television montage of relentlessly patriotic symbology that did not include the words "under god" in its rote reenactment of our national indoctrination rites.
The trial of deposed Tunisian president Zine El Abidine Ben Ali begins today in absentia, since Ben Ali is yukking it up with Saudi royals on his extended vacation there. Today's trial is the first of many, but this one is pretty juicy. Ben Ali is charged with theft, as well as drug and weapons possession, and the case is built on evidence recovered from two of his palaces outside of Tunis.
A seriously disturbed bridegroom, upset over the tab for his wedding at Peckforton Castle in Britain, allegedly took matters into his own hands over the weekend by lighting the place on fire after everyone had gone to sleep. The Daily Mail reports that over 100 firefighters responded to the blaze that started at around 4:45 am. Some 70 wedding guests were sleeping at the time and a man, presumably the bridegroom, was arrested.
